To be disturbed by this?

[Disturbed500]

Family member had weekend guests round the house - a couple and their child of 7/8. Child was shouty and excitable. Heard who I assume to be the father threaten child with “a spanking” and then taken away into a room. From what I could hear child was fine and not hurt & parents at end of tether - seemed fine soon after. I feel really disturbed by it though, seems quite Victorian and stern. I am a very soft touch and will be the first to admit child was being really hard work - running about, screaming, being silly - but feel weird

Bump

So you think the child was actually spanked?

Dont like the word spanking either. Perhaps he just spoke to him sternly though if you didn't hear any other noises, screams or similar and you say he was fine afterwards.

Yes he was as I heard whimpering and similar and (I think?) slapping sounds.

Well obviously that’s completely awful and unacceptable.
You have to ask?
And now illegal in Scotland if that helps.

It wouldn’t worry me. As a child ‘Do you want a smack?’ Or ‘you’re going the right way about getting a smack’. Was pretty much shorthand for ‘you are pushing your luck far too far!’ I think I was actually smacked twice in my life 🤣

Pulling - yes agreed. Those are my thoughts too. I am just processing it now, I feel strange

do you want a smack dc? no df, do you want one when i'm bigger than you ?

Oh just read your updates

From your OP it seemed like he hadn’t actually been smacked.

Well of course it's wrong!!

If the child was actually smacked then that would be wrong but the threat on its own it’s OK. We were sometimes threatened with corporal punishment as kids (Dad saying I will get the special belt out of the wardrobe) and that was enough for us. My Dad (or Mum) never ever raised his voice at us and never ever hit us, yet we knew when we are about to cross the line. Neither me, nor my brother ever shouted or hit own own children and they are well behaved.

Branster - yes he was

I think (could be wrong) that it's only illegal if a mark is left? I'm guessing we dont know how hard he was smacked, if at all. You say you heard whimpering (not screaming as I would expect, or even yelps), and slapping noises? Slaps dont sound as harsh as smacking?

That’s true. To be honest I tried to block it out really.

I am neither for or against smacking children, I think if a parent smacked their child taking their anger and frustration out on them it is wrong, however if a parent smacked (tapped) their child as a last resort and the only way to stop the bad behaviour then so be it

So a child plays up when a guest in someone's house, parents at end of tether take it off and give a good bollocking and possibly a slap and you feel weird?

I don't agree with smacking, slapping, tapping, hitting or any other form of corporal punishment for any person regardless of their age but two things are clear here, you said you only 'think' you heard slapping and you also said child seemed fine and not upset after.

So what now? Are you going to tell the parents they shouldn't have disciplined their child? Never see them again because you are so disturbed by it? Or, more likely, nothing at all?

If you aren't going to say anything there and then there is nothing more to do.