To think coming to work sick is selfish

[Leopardprintchicken]

I'm sure this thread has been done to death at some point but I'm so annoyed right now.

Colleague came to a meeting on their day off (it was not compulsory they came but they had a vested interest in the meeting outcome) and were clearly ill, complaining of cold sweats and horrendous sore throat and cold. Of course both me and another colleague at the meeting caught it (symptoms appeared the same day so not a coincidence) and now I'm spending the weekend feeling dreadful.

I'm a SP and have to fit in all of my chores/life admin stuff on my days off and barely got any sleep last night. I'm barely coping with work/home life anyway and this has pushed me over the edge.

I know people get sick but AIBU to think if you can avoid coming into work when you are contagious you should just stay at home?

Not changing my story, I just didn't make my first post very clear.

Skype would have been a good idea. We didn't know they were ill until they showed up.

I totally get that its difficult if you have no choice but if you do have a choice then surely it would be better to stay at home? I could have fed back the meeting outcome.

You definitely can't win. Taking time off is frowned upon by employers and colleagues resent having to cover for you.

I went in with glandular fever having been told by a nurse at my GP surgery that it was hay fever and to take an antihistamine. Not ideal but I managed it even if I didn't realise what I was doing.

I see your unwell colleague and raise you a toxic toddler at a birthday party - to the point where the parent actually requested calpol from other parents! I’ve been dealing with an unwell preschooler all week as a result

I think it's so unfair companies don't pay sick pay. I'm public sector and get full sick pay - up to 6 months if needed.

And yes whilst I've heard over the years of people taking the piss and going off with a bad back for 6 months in reality that doesn't happen. Occupational health deals with whether you are to sick to continue your job and if you are they find you a different job in a different dept if needed.

There is a nice working atmosphere and within my team we mostly enjoy our job. If one of the team is ill they can take time off to recover and get nothing but sympathy from us.

YANBU. but as several other posters have said, some of us work for employers that heavily penalise absence. It’s not just a lack of sick pay - I’d get sick pay, but absence above a certain level means that my actual salary would be cut.

Well I wouldn’t get sick pay, I can’t afford to loose a days wage unless I couldn’t actually get up.

Maybe employers should change protocols and people may be more inclined to stay home.

Last year l had a severe allergic reaction, and 2 very bad stomach bugs.

We have a rolling programme of 3 absences per year.

So l couldn’t be off, as l would face a disciplinary. Maybe that’s why they are in?

I think it varies if there is no sick pay, my view is someone should still not come to work but I can understand why they do. We have the ability to work from home and very very generous sick pay. My director doesn't like working from home or allow it. She came to work in early September smothering with a dose for nearly a full week. Guess what happened the following week?? I almost had to postpone a hysterectomy that had been scheduled for five months as I caught it.

I've been in that situation before too @Fox and it sucks. Hope your LO gets well soon. That'll be next, my DC will all catch it from me so even more fun to be had.

There is a diarrhoea element to this bug too (sorry if TMI). Other sick colleague thought it was a stomach bug at first.

I know I could have caught it from anywhere but let's face it, you wouldn't actively sit next to a stranger with streaming eyes and cold sweats if you could avoid it. It's different if you are sat at a meeting and cant get away.

YANBU but you can understand it where some places have draconian sickness absence policies and/or don’t pay for sick pay.

I get a cold about every 2-3 months. It usually takes me about 7-10 days to feel better. I'd be sacked if I had that much sick leave. Simples.

YANBU, although some employers are more understanding and sympathetic than others. I've just had two weeks off work due to sickness which is more time than I've had off sick my entire 20 year career combined. My employer has been great and told me to WFH until I'm fully recovered, which could be another 3-4 weeks or even more. Not everyone has that luxury.

Also as others have said, when my illness was contagious I didn't even know I had it and I did go into work during that time.

In the situation you describe though the sick person should have stayed at home and dialled into the meeting or not joined at all.

Life can't possibly stop for a cold. If she hadn't been in work she may have been somewhere else where someone could catch it: a supermarket, a cafe, doing the school run. Or should you not do any of that with a cold, either?

If I had time off work every time I had a cold then, given the small ball of contagious disease that is my toddler (and all other children who go to nursery/school), I'd be off for four months a year. Primary schools would just have to close in winter, as all the primary school teachers I know get an awful lot of colds!

I wouldn't come into a meeting that wasn't compulsory if I was ill. I wouldn't come into work if I had D&V.

But if I had a cold and sore throat, I'm coming into work, sorry. I don't get sick pay in my job, I'm single with a child and I can't afford to lose a day's wages never mind 2 or 3.

I do think companies should change their policy as it costs more in the long run if everyone eventually gets sick. Not everyone handles a bug in the same way and I get really ill when I catch anything because I'm stressed and run down.

I have huge sympathy for those who have to come in and face losing a days pay. I have come in on days where I probably passed on a cold but this situation it was not their scheduled work day and the meeting was not compulsory (the meeting was about something unrelated to their job role but it would benefit them career wise).

Depends on the culture of the workplace. Where I work, anyone who takes time off is given lots of platitudes but some (senior) staff members then slag them off behind their backs.
I had a fortnight off about 4 years ago with a condition which could have potentially been very serious and one person still talks about how she had to cover for me (which she actually didn’t as I did the majority from home and other (nicer) staff covered some other bits).

Staffing is far worse now and that's why I go into work sick sometimes, because if I don’t my colleagues will have to cover my work as well as their own and it doesn’t feel fair. There’s also the sense that certain people will just never let it go.

YANBU. I have a colleague who comes into the office announcing that she's just been sick in the toilets and has been feeling terrible all day but refuses to go home. She's always back in the next day as well complaining she's tired because she's been sick all night. We've got a good sickness policy and no Bradford? Scale so no excuses really.

Yet she complains if I turn up with a sore throat and says I'll infect the office and shouldn't be in

Its the ones who pitch up complete with snotty hankies when they could Skype in to meetings who really irritate me. I dread catching colds (which inevitably happens when my colleagues travel in the winter especially) from being in pokey meeting rooms.

I've been off sick recently and I felt dreadful. I felt so guilty being off but couldn't have coped with being there.

If it's just a cold I would go in. You could catch a cold anywhere and from anyone I don't see the point in hiding indoors I think you just have to get on with it.
D and V then you should stay off and for 48 hours after.
If it was flu you wouldn't be able to get out of bed to come in.

How can I be off ill with a cold if you get a "supportive" meeting for more than a few absences?

Also, if I am off work I still have to set cover for all the lessons I teach anyway - and come in the next day to missing equipment and several classes worth of crap work.

Of course I would rather be off. It's not worth it.

But would you go in when you didn't have to @Wine?

That's exactly what happened, they were complaining about how dreadful they felt, cold sweats, fever, no sleep as if it were some badge of honor.

I wouldnt mind as much if it was a slight cold or bit of a cough but this one is an absolute bastard and they knew it!

In this instance I would not have expected colleague to come to a meeting that wasn't during work time if they were ill, I do think yabu to expect sick people to stay off work just so you don't get infected, at my work there is no sick pay, sick days go against your end of year appraisal, I havent had a day sick in 24 years for this exact reason!

Yanbu, your colleague was very selfish and didn't need to come into work.

Every cold I get turns into a chest infection, I ended up in hospital last year.