Ex DH and I have been separated for 3 years now, DCs are 5, 8 and 11.
He lives 3.5hrs away and lives with his parents, he doesn’t pay anything and I haven’t hassled because he declares poverty so what’s the point. He has them on some half terms and 2 weeks in the summer. All just for me to work as obviously I use my annual leave to cover the rest of no school time (have to pay expensive holiday club for the rest). He comes on the occasional weekend in between but only with a few days notice and only ever for about 4hrs as he has to drive there and back.
Anyway I would like him to do every other weekend, they would love this as they miss him. I’ve offered to take them half way, pay his fuel, rent an air bnb anything! To make this happen.
I think he should come on a Saturday, stay at my house (I’ll go elsewhere), and leave Sunday evening.
His argument is staying here with the children will confuse them as this should be my home with them.
I think this is bollocks to get out of it!
Who is right?
Oh and 2nd AIBU he won’t sign the no fault divorce papers, I waited 3 years as I didn’t want to hurt him with the list of unreasonable behaviour (like shagging my friend) and wanted to stay amicable for the kids, hence never pushing for money.
But if he won’t sign then I’m going to have to take it to court and spend a fortune anyway so may as well chuck in financial arrangements and custody at the same time! Hence asking the 1st question.
Yes BTW he’s an idiot because he will force me to make things acrimonious and get the custody/financial issues that he says he doesn’t want to have by not signing. He’s creating the situation 