to not go out anywhere with 3 DC

[Backtobacktoback]

I have run out of ideas and am so tired of the fighting and the shouting (me) when I take them out to cafes or restaurants, or anywhere really. I make sure they are fed and rested and and have somewhere to run off some energy yet any moment they are not eating or playing they are fighting or complaining. 3 DC under 8, I don't remember it being this bad a year ago but then again I was a year younger!
What strategies have you wise mumsnet parents got for me to manage the bickering and teasing?

Are they the same if taken to soft play or play parks? Just thinking that in cafes and restaurants they don't get much opportunity to split off and do their own thing/interact with other kids (rather than their siblings).

I wouldn't take my 3 to a restaurant.
Parks, soft play, woods, child centred activities yes. Restaurants no. Unless very child friendly and quick

Just don't stop feeding them when you're out. This comes with it's own problems but the peace is wonderful! My toddler got through a whole packet of crackers on the walk to the doctors the other day because it was raining, we had no car, the double buggy was elsewhere and he loves a good whine. Worked a treat and he's still alive having not being killed by either the cracker overdose or his mother.

Take them places they can run and explore, woods, foot paths, parks, fields, beaches. I disagree with this constant feeding thing. I don't see the need.

So I am obviously expecting too much for them NOT to bicker while I drink my coffee/eat my sandwich/use the restaurant toilet.

I have to admit, that's a bit s*. I don't know what possessed me to think otherwise.

No advice but sympathy! My eldest of 3 just turned 4 and I’m finding it veeerrrry hard-going atm, it’s the constant whining and bickering that really does me in too. I can’t imagine how I’ll cope when the baby is old enough to join in too!

I do agree with the advice to avoid cafes, restaurants, etc. in favour of more “child-friendly” activities, for now. I know you shouldn’t have to but why make it more stressful than it needs to be? At least in a child-centered place staff/other customers will have seen it all before and will understand!

Is it any good setting your expectations clearly before you go out, then reinforcing them before you go into a cafe, or are they to young to understand?

'Today, we are going to x, on the way there you will walk nicely. when we get there I will tell you what we are going to do.'

On arrival, 'We will go into this cafe and sit quietly, we will choose what we'd like to drink, then we'll sit still, have our drink, then we'll leave and walk to x'

On arrival at x, we will ... etc.

Would that work or are they too young? I only had one, so whilst that worked for me, it may not apply for you.

Thank you all x, will give some of these strategies a go.
For those of you going through the same