To not know what to do anymore

[Hoopenonia]

Name changed as don't want this to be on my posting history. Son is 16 and in year 12. He's always had bad behaviour since year 7 with disrupting lessons, fighting and Being rude to teachers etc. He almost got excluded last year. Since year 7 the headteacher has tried to be fair with him. On Wednesday he went to punch a girl because she made him angry. And he was in isolation for the rest of the day and yesterday. Today he was in normal lessons and at lunch time he punched a boy in the eye. Since the start of the school year he's been in trouble 5+ times. I don't know what to do! Can I have some advice.

His headteacher told him today that if he punched someone and it was out of school the police would be involved.

I don't understand why they aren't involved just because he's in school. He's in first year of sixth form now, not year 7. His behaviour is getting worse. If someone attacked my child I'd be called the police. Being at school makes no bloody difference 😕

My son is 16 and if he came home having been punched by a boy of the same age, I would be reporting it to the police as it is assault.

I spend my life in nursery trying to explain to under 5's that violence isn't allowed and talking about kind hands and feet and why we shouldn't hurt others.

This needs stronger intervention as his anger sounds out of control.

No I'm not with his father I've been a single mum since he was 1.

His behaviour is good at home. I've tried alot of things since year 7 by taking his xbox off him, reminding him to do homework (he used to not complete it), grounding him and taking his phone etc.

No he doesn't do any sports.

His behaviour was good the end of year 11.

I hate to label, but might he have ADHD or something? Outbursts are really common with this and MAY explain his rather erratic behaviour. Go to the GP for help and to the school. They should have a record of everything and there may be a pattern. School should be helping you to get to the bottom of it. Good luck.

Since year 7 I knew his behaviour was bad but I've tried everything but nothing works and he says he won't misbehave but he does.

I have no idea why it started as he would occasionally misbehave in primary school but when he got to year 7 he started not doing his homework, being late to lessons, disrupting the lesson and being rude to the teacher. And then in year 9 he started fighting and swearing at the teacher.

I feel so sorry for you OP, my brother was and still is similar.

Does your son ever show aggression towards you?

This may sound like a daft idea but here goes.
Take him to the local gym / boxing ring/wrestling ring and he can vent his frustrations out in that type of environment where it will be managed.
Also point out to him that one of these days you are going to get a taste of your own medicine if you keep this shit up.
Good luck.

No he doesn't show aggression towards me and his behaviour is fine at home

This doesn't add up at all. I just don't get why he was offered sixth form if he had a history of fighting and swearing at teachers. Prepare yourself for him leaving school in the next week or so.

You do need to get him some psychological help asap. So easy to keep thinking 'next term things will change' and 'he's got the summer holidays to get over this' but he hasn't. You know there is something very wrong there and you have to grasp the nettle.
I am cross with you because you're putting other students at risk in order that you can keep pretending everything is ok with your own dc.
I am also scared for you because if you let this continue you will be on the receiving end one day. That stands to reason because sooner or later there will be only you left in his life. His uncontrollable anger will result in No school, no college, no job, no friends....only Mum.

I think the school thought he would change his behaviour as he did the end of year 11.

I'm not pretending his behaviour is OK.