To not want another child

[applebe]

Just that really.. I would have and still would love a big family.. but I'm currently suffering with postnatal depression/anxiety and I don't want to potentially put myself through it again in the future.

DP thinks I'm being incredibly selfish as he wants more children and thinks it's a stupid reason to not have anymore.

AIBU?

YANBU

YANBU.
Your DP is being incredibly selfish.

So he doesn't really care that you are suffering with your mental health right now after having your baby? He'd rather you were just a brood mare and fuck that PND nonesense? Hmmm....and he thinks YOU'RE the selfish one?

How old is your baby

@Waveysnail DC is 6 months old

Even if you didn't have anxiety/depression, there is nothing wrong with electing to only have one child.

You’re baby is 6 months old - why are you even discussing this now ? Give yourself some time.

If you later decide you genuinely don’t want another baby, that’s fine. Anyone is free to make this decision if it is right for them.

But if you do want another baby but fear is holding you back, then I’d suggest trying to determine what the fears are and look at ways to overcome them - counselling etc... Just because you had PND once doesn’t mean you’ll get it again, you might be better placed to cope with it if it does happen having been through it once, you might decide it was worth the hell of PND once you’ve recovered - it doesn’t last forever although it can feel that way when you’re in it. Who knows how you’ll feel in the future.

If your husband is pressuring you now while you’re suffering from PND, then someone needs to point out how unreasonable (and frankly unkind) he is being. I wouldn’t want another baby with him either if he’s that unsupportive.

However sometimes depression can colour how we react to things - is he meaning to pressure you or do you think he’s trying to help you to overcome you depression and find a way to get the big family you say you have always wanted (albeit in an ill thought out, ham-fisted way). Only you know what he’s like.

Does he think he’s helping (even if he isn’t) or is he being a twat ? Difficult to judge from one paragraph, although it is clear you feel pressured so should explain that to him and ask he supports you now when you need it.

Argh - your baby, not you’re baby.