To think my life is fucked

[timestanp]

Mother to three. Useless Angry absent husband upped and left for another woman by all accounts. One child has snThe other has serious anxiety.Exam year for the eldest teen. Dumped by very close friend for a jealous partner.Looking and feeling every single day of my years. Can’t shift the feeling of doom and dread.What can I do? Awaiting to move into new home with kids.kids very upset over horrible atmosphere and their dads absence in their lives. Worried about kids, loneliness, mental health,money. Is there any silver lining olease?

Anyone?

No advice but just wanted to bump thread and say sorry things are so rubbish for you ATM. I hope you will be happier in your new home and able to make a fresh start there

Thanks

Can you treat the new home as a 'fresh start' in your lives? It doesn't sound like your ex-h is much of a loss to your own mental health at least, if he was angry and absent.

Good luck

A new start. Take it one step at a time, and look forward to getting your life back.
Make plans and just do what you can in order of priority and look after yourself.

So to start with there is going to be this initial period of upheaval where you can't think straight and everything is a massive struggle. But it is going to come together. There is nothing quite like shedding an angry negative person from your life and starting anew, being able to make all your choices for yourself, rediscovering who you are and what you like, the things you like to do, and how you like to spend your time. It sounds like you have spent years carrying the emotional burden of your marriage and the relief you will feel when you only have to suit yourself is incomparable. Your children, although initially resistant to the change will live happier and relaxed lives no longer living under the shadow of an angry parent.

This is the beginning. It will be wonderful.

I got rid of my useless twat of a husband 3 years ago. Life is much better. OK so I've had to seriously downsize 300 miles away but at least my life is my own now.
Yes initially everything is awful and you despair but as time goes by you realise how wonderful life is without a nastypical partner and the children will be more relaxed as well.

It sounds like you are going through a hellish time of things right now

I agree with others that this move to a new home could be a fresh new start for you and your kids, away from bad memories associated with your current home. Your ex sounds like a nasty piece of work, and as horrible as it is you are all better off without him - though I completely appreciate it's easy for me to say that and less easy to feel it in your position. It must be very hard on the kids (his fault, not yours AT ALL) - have you considered counselling for them? My DD is having counselling for anxiety, and though the circumstances are different to yours I can say that it has really helped her - perhaps your DC would benefit? As for your fickle friend, that is very hurtful. Perhaps your new move will bring the opportunity to meet new people and form new friendships? Although things are awful now I have a feeling that in a few years you will look back and see how far you've come, and you will be happier - it's just this horrible bit at the moment must be so hard. Could you plan something to look forward to at the end of your child's exams, as a well done treat, so there is at least something pleasant on the horizon to focus on?

I kow this sounds like soothsaying but it is true life will change, at the moment you need to grieve as do your children. Take care of yourself and dont allow yourself to rant or cry more than once a day. Dont allow that man to have any more impact on your life. It WILL get better

This might not be for you, but I went to the doctor and got some lovely SSRIs to help with the constant feeling of doom and dread you describe. Anxiety is a right wanker. Hope things settle down for you soon, OP.

Thank you all so very much . You’ve made my day.i will look upon our move as a new start and line up something to look forward to