to ask for your positive stories of meeting someone after 50?

[Really222]

That’s all 😊.

I am 50 and the notion of meeting someone seems impossible. Aibu to sometimes think that (new) love is for young people?

I understand but my work colleague did OLD, is now married to a lovely DP she met at 49, married 2 years later.

My mother had 35 years with my father before he passed away, then a year later aged 58 she met her partner and they were very happy together for six years before she passed away. They also met when she was already fighting cancer.
Oh and my father was 49 when he met my mother and had three children with her and 35 years together before he passed away.

My mother met her partner aged 59, they are still crazy about each other 25 years later. It isn't an ideal relationship but it is very loving and makes them both happy.

I'm 50 myself and at the moment only want mostly sexual connections - those are very easy to come by if you ever feel like doing that.

Friend's neighbour, 63, white haired and a bit unsteady on feet, going gently into older age, liked to go once a week to golf club where late husband had been member. Met a man there, a couple of years older, who was 'very wealthy, just back in UK to visit children, lives in large house in Channel Isles, has a yacht he spends lots of time on, we've really hit it off together'. Oh dear. How likely is that? Cue concern about her, her house, her savings etc. . Everything was true, they married soon afterwards and last I heard of her she was drinking gin and tonic on the deck while admiring the sunset. Lovely. It can happen and she wasn't looking for it.

I'm 50 myself and at the moment only want mostly sexual connections - those are very easy to come by if you ever feel like doing that.

How @TemporaryPermanent - is that from OLD?

I tried that for two seconds twice, or even three times, but it was so depressing I deleted my accounts.

Plus I don’t know what I have to offer? Once people got to know me they might like me I guess, or elements of my personality, but on the surface it’s pretty “blah” IMO. Now out of a difficult marriage and horrible divorce, it’s me in my admin job that exhausts me, and the rest of the time I am with three challenging teenage dc.

Plus, I have lost all joie de vivre somehow. And that’s when you don’t consider the fact that there are lots of younger women who are probably more attractive propositions.

Not desperate to meet anyone by a long stretch, but just wondering if it’s time to not even think about romance. Ever.

My old Clinical Leader was unhappily single & childless at age 50... tried OLD and met an attractive divorcee in his 50s with grown up children.... got married quickly...
from having a grey curly perm (seriously!) & looking miserable she dyed her hair blonde & had a permanent smile on her face!!

Also know 2 other woman recently got married in early 50s for the 2nd & 3rd times respectively.

And know several divorced women in their 50s & older who have boyfriends/ partners they've met recently.

Gives me hope as I'm going through a very single patch at 43 :(

My father in law was widowed before 50, he met a lovely woman on a walking holiday and married again in his 60s

My mother was widowed at 52, she met her current partner at 57, so far they've had 23 years together. He's 12 years older than she is and now in a nursing home, palliative care only sadly, but she has over two decades of wonderful memories.

Met my current partner at 49 and been together 6 years now. He's a bit older than me which I reckon makes him keen! I'm his younger woman! Ha!!
I was at the end of a very long relationship and totally get the feeling of 'what have I got to offer?' but the energy and freedom of breaking out of that relationship really gave me the a lot of oomph.
Go for it!

Oh and I have three teens too.

Kind of OLD - on hookup sites. Tbh sex only connections are easy to find for straight women on any site. I just wanted it to be absolutely clear that I was not looking for a dating type relationship.

I was convinced that i wouldnt get any interesting responses and when I started sending my picture out I would get lots of rejections. I didn't. It perhaps helps that I'd lost some weight and had a new haircut, not that the details matter but I was feeling more confident. I've met some genuinely nice men, three or four of whom I still have pleasant message exchanges with quite often. You can set your own boundaries - some will always push at them but you don't have to give in.

Thanks for the messages. I don’t know, it’s so easy to fall into a kind of depressed mindset. I can look nice, but I can also catch sight of myself when I don’t expect it and think WTAF - of course your days of attracting the opposite sex are over,

I am quite shy really so I don’t think I could cope with hook ups - and in any case don’t find people attractive that often really.

It doesn’t help that I have a house full of teenagers telling me how old I am.

My dad met my stepmom in his fifties through online dating. They’re now married and have been for several years and are by far the happiest couple I’ve ever met! They’re perfect for each other and laugh constantly and have so much fun together! All my friends are jealous of them!

My mum met her now husband through online dating. She was in her 50s. She almost didn't keep up the conversation as he talked a lot about what he was having for his tea which made me think he sounded very normal and down to earth! They are very very happy now

I met my dh at 54.

"And that’s when you don’t consider the fact that there are lots of younger women who are probably more attractive propositions."

But are they wanting run of the mill 50+ men?

This is a, lie, we are sold. That men can pull any Woman of any age group, when in reality most 50+ women are in better shape, keeping themselves more current and in touch with modern life, than most men. I'm not saying it's easy to find someone. A lot of 50+ year olds are discovering that they lije being single. It wasn't an option that was sold to our generation like it is now. As wasn't being childfree.

OP it sounds as though you are in a rut. The teenage years are hard. I don't know were you are Menopause wise but peri Menopause can be tough, especially the mental side.

Work on getting your joie de vivre back. Get tougher on your teens. Your reproductive life is over, you've had your children. The downside to being young is they don't know how their life will pan out. Youth is wasted on the young.

So, why are you exhausted, has the peri Menopause started? Sort that out/ride it out.

I've got health problems and four false teeth, that's preventing me from dating. The teeth are fixable. But life is a lot less complicated off the dating scene and I'm enjoying concentrating on me. It's liberting. I'm not trying to hook a man, chase a serious qualification (i do Adult ed courses though), chase a career, or trying to/or avoid getting pregnant. It really is all about me (and my Grandchildren admittedly).

So I'm thinking of all the other things i always wanted to do. I've just given up processed carbs and want to get into power lifting. I'm on HRT and I'm feeling a lot better.

I know i want to start walking in beautiful places. I have trips planned every year just for me.

I keep picking up leaflets for meditation courses.

Don't fixate for the time being on dating. Take a couple of years for you. Then you'll get back what you've got to give.

Read older women positivity articles and blogs etc. Realise this is your time. Men don't like older women for lits of reasons, but one is we scare them because we've suddenly got everything figured out.

I have friends who've found a partner in tbeir 50's, but only after valuing this next life stage.

I second the HRT.

Place marking.

Hi op,you have a lot to offer that younger women may not have.
Value yourself and all of your skills and accomplishments.If you wrote down all your pluses I bet there are so many you'll be suprised!😀.
Love is everywhere and when you're ready the right one will come along,just when you're not expecting it!🌷🌷

I'm a 57 year old male who just despite decent photos and a well written profile doesnt get any interest.

Once you're over 55 Tinder just lumps everyone in a group of 55+ - so conceivably you're dealing with a 45 year age range!

KarmaStar That's not helpful. There's other threads going about being single, and it is patently bollocks about the right one coming along, love is everywhere cliche

Slightly younger but mum was 48 when she met her second husband. Just get yourself out and about, meeting as many people as poss I'd say!

As previous posters said, it's not as easy when you're older, but I don't think it's impossible either.

My stepmum was 55 when she met my dad (OLD). They were the most ridiculously in love, romantic couple you have ever met. Just completely meant to be together. I doubt she'd see herself as being able to compete with 'younger propositions' either, but she was the most beautiful woman in the world to him.

An uncle of mine took up online dating after his wife died, when he was in his mid-70s. They had been together nearly 50 years. He has just remarried, to a woman a similar age.