To want to hear some success stories of DC with ASD/C in mainstream school please

[Knoxinbox]

My DD has recently started reception in local mainstream school. No formal diagnoses but HV agrees with me there are enough concerns re: high functioning ASD that she has referred DD for assessment, currently awaiting initial appointment (and waiting and waiting and waiting....!)

Anyway, negotiated gradual start of 3 mornings a week and start building up from there... DD is struggling even with this. Having almost daily meltdowns at home now, not sleeping well, says she’s worried about school, refuses to eat or drink there (one reason she doesn’t stay for lunch)

I joined the Facebook group Not fine in school and now I feel utterly horrified and down about all the awful stories on there about how schools have failed to support their children with SEN

Anyone out there with a success story of a child with ASD attending mainstream school? What do you think has helped? Any advice to give a newbie just starting down this journey?

Should I push for an EHCP before diagnosis for example? Try and involve Senco from the beginning? Try and negotiate a continuation of the flexischooling arrangement we have pre-CSA?

Thanks in advance

is there a reason why you want success stories from mainstream only?

not all children with ASD are cut out for mainstream. DD spent the whole primary years in mainstream with support but that was for lack of SS places, not what we wanted. She is now in a SS secondary and so much more happy.

have a look at special schools and be open. mainstream is failing an awful lot of kids with ASD. if it's not working, I wouldn't want that for my child.

I would agree that mainstream not for all children.
However, can work well for others.
I have known success stories in both.
With a child I know now in specialist provision , he is now thriving, where just surviving in mainstream.

Good point!

I see what you mean, I guess I was asking for mainstream because my DD has just started in mainstream and I was feeling a bit overwhelmed about settling her in and worrying that she wouldn’t and looking for reassurance. It’s our local catchment rural village school and has lots of positives and we’ve met some lovely local families I was just hoping she would settle well and thrive...

But maybe she won’t, I don’t know I guess every parent just wants their child to be happy.

Its just hard sometimes when you look around and see other children her age making friends, being socialable easily and enjoying school and your own DC is having meltdowns, waking up constantly worrying about school, refusing to eat or drink etc

I guess I just wish it wasn’t that way for both of us. Obviously I never communicate that to my beautiful DD, she is wonderful and special just as she is

Sorry rambling now

Not rambling at all. Starting school is a concern for all parents and much more so for a child with extra support needs.
Make sure she is on radar for assessment and support.
Very best of luck for both of you on her educational journey.

Knox, I guess I know what you mean. esp when you are just starting out on this SN journey, you have hope that you child will be, despite disability, somewhat 'normal' - go to a school where the locals go, do things other children do. just fitting in.

we are a few years further down the road and I think I had probably similar feelings initially. But with a almost teen, I figured, it wouldn't work for us this way and I let it all go and now fully embrace that we have to do things differently but I admit it took years for me to get to this point.

I’m absolutely an advocate of special schools, but my concern is kids are going to special school because they get a plan too late or have too little support. My plan will be a non-statutory Plan, school will believe it’s the step before EHCP, because that’s probably LA policy, but it’s not the law (nor are they necessarily acting illegally, but it’s a way that’s developed to save money. An EHCP is a legal document). Ipsea is a really good place to start www.ipsea.org.uk/news/non-statutory-ehc-plans

Special needs jungle also. If you like these groups on FB, you’ll see the articles as they come out.