are you 'closer' to one child more than another?

[OkMaybeNot]

I have three children. 9yo DS, 6yo DD and 3yo DD. Goes without saying that I love them all with all my being.

But I find myself feeling really guilty that DS and I have always had a different bond to the bonds I share with the girls. Not greater, not better, but different.

Maybe because he was my first? Maybe because we have similar personalities?

I don't know but it makes me feel really guilty that I can notice a difference in the way me and DS understand eachother, and the way I understand the girls. It's almost like I know what he's feeling and thinking in a way I don't with them - I have to work at it a little more.

I grew up in a house with 5 kids where there was a clear favourite - and it definitely wasn't me. So I'm super paranoid about turning into my mum and having a special favourite child.

Wanted to see if anyone else felt the same.

I have two of each and find my son’s easier to deal with than my daughter’s. I try my hardest to be the best for them all but my DD’s are naturally more ‘highly strung’ if you like. They’re louder and more inclined to kick up a fuss than my DS’s ever have. My DS’s are calm, quiet, gentle and you can take them anywhere without worrying about them throwing a hissy fit. DD’s kick off sometimes for no reason at all.

Sounds like my DS’s are the golden children but it’s really not that, they just genuinely are easier to handle.

I love both of mine equally but in a different way. Difficult to explain, no favouritism(I hope) but both are different people and personalities. DC2 has ASD so it impacts all of us.
We all make allowances for DC2 but DC1 gets taken out separately so he doesn’t miss out on the things his peers do (swimming pool, bike trip, fishing)

I worry about this too. I have one of each and it is just like @Whattodoabout said my DS is just so much easier to handle than my DD. Until I read what she put, I wasn't sure if it was just because she is older than he is, if it is because he is a boy or because my DD is more like me personality wise and my DS is more like my DH, but he is just so much easier. My DS is really cuddly whereas my DD never was, if I tell my DS to do something he does it, even if he doesn't want to do it, he will still do it just winge a little, whereas my DD would just refuse and now starts an argument about it.
I adore my DD with all my being, but she is just so much more difficult.

Your kids are just people with different personalities, of course your relationship with each will be a bit different, that's perfectly normal, that doesn't mean you love any of them less