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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Rich people getting sponsored to do fun stuff

178 replies

SmuggleStudies · 23/09/2019 18:17

Fucking hell, another extremely wealthy acquaintance has just done this. It makes no sense. You like running half marathons, so do it. If you want to donate, then great - you could give thousands and it would be like one of us dropping a tenner. Why ask your colleagues, who are on average considerably less well off, to give so you can further feed your ego?

AIBU to think most charity sponsorship bis bullshit?

OP posts:
Youseethethingis · 23/09/2019 19:55

Maybe the value is in raising awareness of a charity, rather than funds? Hmm
Whatever, you can skydive on your own time and your own coin, I won’t be paying for it. Glad I’ve found my people, thought I was just a misery guts getting all irritated by the virtue signalling shenanigans these days.

LittleLostThing · 23/09/2019 19:56

Yanbu at all. A few months before my wedding a guy from work was doing the rounds to raise money to do the exact trip that I was doing for my honeymoon. All for charity of course (after he’d raised 3k, the extra £50 or so would go to charity). I told him that I was going there for my honeymoon and he asked me which charity I was doing it through. He seemed completely baffled that I wasn’t doing for charity and that I wouldn’t sponsor him. He didn’t even get to the top of the mountain, I’m guessing he didn’t give anyone their money back.

LittleLostThing · 23/09/2019 19:58

thehonest no issue with people donating to charity. Big issue with paying for someone to go to the pub, them putting any change from the pub into the charity tin and then acting like Mother Teresa for their selflessness.

Peanutbutterforever · 23/09/2019 20:00

I don't mind being (gently) asked for sponsorship as I can say no, but only as long as the person has paid all their expenses. I don't mind giving a donation, but I don't want to subsides their holiday.

SalrycLuxx · 23/09/2019 20:00

I’d sponsor someone if they were going to do something utterly terrifying to them. So an arachnophobic living in a spider filled room for a week, or someone with a terror of heights doing skydiving.

If they’re out for ‘the experience’ then they can pay themselves.

TheHonestTruth100 · 23/09/2019 20:02

@LittleLostThing maybe I'm naive but I'm sure the majority of people going round asking for donations are not spending it all on themselves and putting £5 into a charity box.

OP specifically mentioned You like running half marathons, so do it. Since when is running a marathon a barrel full of fun? They get a buzz out of pushing themselves and they're raising money for a charity at the same time, people are getting annoyed at that?

Baguetteaboutit · 23/09/2019 20:03

Woah, woah, when did this take such a dark turn? It's Tarquin and Jocasta or Xanthe, let's leave Helena our of it.

Original poster
SmuggleStudies · 23/09/2019 20:05

@MadameButterface that's a cause I can get behind. Put me down for a tenner.

OP posts:
NewarkShark · 23/09/2019 20:06

Surely it depends on the event and how people go about it.

Asking people to donate to an event where the donation funds the experience is cheeky. I’ve never come across that and am stunned anyone would ask that.

Last year, a friend and I did a skydive for charity. It was to raise money in memory of a good friend who had recently died (very young) for a charity which had helped him. His parents were touched and loads of his friends and family donated.

We paid all costs and expenses ourselves and 100% of donations went to the charity.

I completely get why people wouldn’t want to donate to it, money is tight and people get a lot of requests. But I don’t think it was cheeky and I don’t think it was “bullshit”.

Looobyloo · 23/09/2019 20:11

I hate this. One of our neighbours is always going away on sponsored treks through the Amazon or South America, his family make out he's some sort of hero. I'd love to do those treks but if I did I'd bloody pay for them myself. Why do these sponsored treks abroad anyway? Hike for miles In your own town, save the thousands it cost to fund these trips and give the money to charity.

Cloudyyy · 23/09/2019 20:12

What I don’t understand is.. if you’re covering your costs, why not just gift that money to the charity yourself? Particularly when it’s an expensive activity. Stop making out that the charity is helped by you climbing Kilimanjaro or jumping out of a plane. Donate the money you would’ve spent on the activity and stop making it all about you. If you want to do these things, just do them without all the glory hunting and pestering others for donations so you can donate their money on their behalf.

Mothership4two · 23/09/2019 20:13

YANBU but I'm happy to do it for kids/young people - not for jollies though.

I feel a bit meh when wealthy celebrities come on tv asking the public for money for charities. My thinking is "stick your hand in your pocket and pull out a substantial amount first" ie £1M. But maybe I'm just being a bit bah humbug

swingofthings · 23/09/2019 20:14

Totally agree. I like doing events that are part of a fundraising event, but I don't ask people for money. I find it very condescending to expect people to pay me to do something that isn't that much of a challenge anyway, to sponsor a cause they might not mean that much to them in the first place.

I give the money myself and I'm sure my colleague donate to the charities of their choices. I only sponsor people who either do a challenge that I know will mean a massive training preparation to accomplish and who do it because it means a lot to them, or those who support a charity I support to.

TabbyMumz · 23/09/2019 20:16

"I gave up sponsoring people for 2019, also adding money in collections for birthdays, weddings, leaving do etc. It is very liberating."
Love this. After giving to works collections for years, I realised I was being a bit of a mug. And I stopped doing it. ...its great. I sign the card, tick my name, shake the envelope of money, and pass it on.

m0therofdragons · 23/09/2019 20:16

Meh, holidays annoy me but we've just done a fun run as a family and quite a few family, friends and colleagues sponsored us. It was a good cause and we put some effort in raising awareness re the charity. I paid for the entrance fee and all sponsorship money went 100% to the charity.

duvetaddict · 23/09/2019 20:18

Yanbu

m0therofdragons · 23/09/2019 20:21

We did a skydive years ago but again, we paid to do it so nobody was subsidising our activity. We raised 3k.

My uncle still won't speak to my mum or I because we refused to sponsor my cousin to go on a holiday thing. I had just had a baby and couldn't afford a holiday myself and dm refused as cousin had been to Borneo, Peru and the school ski trip that year.

TheHonestTruth100 · 23/09/2019 20:22

Does everyone around know you make direct debit contributions to charities? I assume not.

So why assume that these people aren't making private contributions to charities also?

I've never met anyone who's done something like "go for a trek abroad" or "go skydiving" and not covered all the costs for themselves with 100% donations going to charity.

A lot of the time these sponsorships are not just about raising money but also raising awareness. You don't raise awareness by donating privately. I'm not saying it's a bad thing to do that, but having sponsored activities is also an important part for charities so their message and cause gets shared.

m0therofdragons · 23/09/2019 20:24

What I don’t understand is.. if you’re covering your costs, why not just gift that money to the charity yourself?

Because you want to take part in the activity while also raising awareness. We give to a charity each Christmas but it's a bit crass to post about it on FB however you can say you're doing an event for x charity and people get on board. Our weekend fun run raised £20k in one morning which the charity would never see in donations without such events!

NewarkShark · 23/09/2019 20:25

Donate the money you would’ve spent on the activity and stop making it all about you

Lovely attitude. It cost us about £750 for both of us to do the skydive. We raised near to £10k.

WhereTheWildFlowersAre · 23/09/2019 20:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Baguetteaboutit · 23/09/2019 20:29

You don't raise awareness by donating privately.

There's also the radical approach - talking to people about the charities you think are important.

scattercushion17 · 23/09/2019 20:31

I volunteer for a charity and I also help my work's chosen charity. I try to give my time as well as a couple of direct debits.

I'm really hoping that no one objects to a charity cake sale as at least you get cake for your buck! Vital fundraiser for us!

Sweetpea55 · 23/09/2019 20:32

Is this a bit like crowd funding?

Userzzzzz · 23/09/2019 20:35

I have to admit I haven’t seen any requests for sponsored holidays or sky dives for years. I wonder if they’ve gone out of fashion as so many people think they’re taking the piss. I used to hate them especially as I was a low paid grad compared to the well paid management types that were doing the fun activity . The marathon i think fair enough- most people have to train a lot and do give up a big portion of their life to running.