Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To leave his dirty shoes on his pillow?

16 replies

BishBashBoshy · 20/09/2019 20:51

He last wore them 3 weeks ago. His response when asked to put them away is "mutter, hmph, they're dirty, it's so unfair, mutter" and to move them 5ft. They have so far been in the hall, living room, dining room and by the back door.

Today our 8 year old tripped up over them (again). Apparently he told her it was her own fault and he moved them behind the sofa.

They are now on his pillow, dirt and all. I was nice, I put a towel under them.

He's not going to be happy come bedtime. I suspect he still won't put them away and will just leave them by the side of his bed but meh. We won't have to see or trip up over them.

The "funny" thing is that earlier this week he was moaning about stuff being everywhere but he doesn't help. Everything will be left on his pillow from now on. Until he starts pulling his weight.

OP posts:
MissConductUS · 20/09/2019 20:53

Where are they supposed to go? Are these joggers he just wears to garden or something?

Soubriquet · 20/09/2019 20:55

How bizarre....

It takes less than 2 mins to put them away and yet he would rather move them everywhere else Confused

Nextphonewontbesamsung · 20/09/2019 20:56

Yadnbu.

Put every single thing he leaves lying around on his pillow every single night of the week.

ShirleyPhallus · 20/09/2019 20:57

What an own goal for you

Absolutely gross to have to get in to bed next to a pair of stinky shoes or where they’ve been

Brandnewshit · 20/09/2019 21:03

Yep and dirty bedding for you to strip and wash too.
I'd have just put them in a bag and thrown in his wardrobe or cupboard under the stairs

flouncyfanny · 20/09/2019 21:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
BishBashBoshy · 20/09/2019 21:37

As I said they are on a towel so no dirty bedding. We go to bed at the same time so I won't be snuggling up to dirty shoes.

We have a shoe cupboard but they don't fit in there apparently. What he means is that he'll have to move a pair of shoes in there so they fit. His dirty shoes sat in FRONT of the cupboard for a week. The only other place is his wardrobe which isn't an issue if he cleaned them first.

I could just put them away for him but I'm his partner, not his cleaner. It isn't a one off. He's just being lazy and inconsiderate.

I asked him to hang the washing out the other day. He threw it on the radiators in a big heap (it had started raining). He said "I put the radiators on" as if to justify why he hadn't even sorted it. The radiators had been on all day the washing was still sosking wet becsuse it was in a heap. We actually have one of those ceiling drier things which works brilliantlywithout heat and isn't exactly hard to master. I dared to ask of he'd put on the pile of pre-sorted washing sitting in front of the washing machine. Apparently I hadn't asked and he'd "done the drying" so what else did I expect?

I'll admit I have enabled him to some degree but it stops now.

OP posts:
Original poster
BishBashBoshy · 20/09/2019 21:40

I've posted before that he is incapable of using the washing basket which is purposely on his side of the bed. He just dumps his clothing on the floor. I can't see it so it doesn't bother me to much and he knows that if it's not in the basket, it doesn't get washed.

The problem is he then runs out of clothes and dumps it all in. I refuse to do it so he does but then we end up with his drying clothes all over the place because there is too to go on the ceiling drier. This Then disrupts my washing cycle.

OP posts:
haflump · 20/09/2019 21:44

Are there even any benefits of living with such a manchild???

If DH left his dirty shoes around for as long as yours has, they’d be in the bloody bin by now. But he won’t because he’s an adult. YANBU

justthecat · 20/09/2019 21:46

Ha you sound like me, boots and all. Mine leaves leaps of worn clothes in the spare bedroom, I put them them back in his drawers ( love the dirtier the better) so when he wants to wear a certain item it’s filthy

KellyHall · 20/09/2019 21:48

Some people are just crap at some things I'm afraid. I have to move my husband's trainers from next to the dinner table in to the hallway (less than two feet!) EVERY DAY to prevent anyone tripping over them. He constantly has a huge pile of clothes on/around a chair which also gets routinely dumped in the wash all at once causing our home to look like a Chinese laundry!

But, he's a wonderful father and a loving husband, he makes lovely food and tastier sauces than anyone else. He does everything when we have a bbq or go camping and will do whatever I ask him, even if I do always have to ask him.

In the grand scheme of things, does a pair of shoes really matter that much?

ShirleyPhallus · 20/09/2019 22:07

Really interesting how much in partnerships the woman tends to be the tidier one and gets het up about this stuff. Who is to say what’s the right way to do something / what level of messiness is acceptable?

DH was in the army for years so I’d fastidious about tidiness in a way I’m not. I can easily miss mess - clothes can sit on the chair next to my bed and I really don’t notice it. I’m not dirty or untidy really, just a bit more relaxed about it and blind to stuff like leaving shoes around.

If he explained to me that it was driving me mad I’d move them, but would be really upset in the PA way of putting them on my pillow. Appreciate the scenarios are different tho

TheFaerieQueene · 20/09/2019 22:12

He must be fantastic in bed.

OnlyLittleMissOrganised · 21/09/2019 14:42

What happened OP? Where did he put his shoes?

Ringdonna · 21/09/2019 14:53

Why don’t you just clean them and put them away?

TheDarkPassenger · 21/09/2019 14:57

Why don’t you just clean them and put them away?

LOL^ Yes op, you naughty naughty wife! Go and clean your husbands shoes immediately!

Ps I’d have binned them ages ago and have for a lot less before

New posts on this thread. Refresh page