AIBU? Upset/nursery/partner

[Maddie2019]

Before I blow my top AIBU.
My partner really upset me this morning, I have been on two mandatory training courses for work 70 miles away the past 2 days meaning I’ve only been able to see my LO for half hour a day max!

I got home yesterday and had him in bed for 1930, but he wanted me to lie down with him and chat, it was obvious how much we both missed each other. Anyway I lost track of time and my partner comes up stairs to have a go, saying it’s now 8pm and he’s going to be tired for nursery (which I understand but it was only 30 mins later!, and he’s 3)

This morning my LO is emotional and doesn’t want me to go to work ( who can blame him, 1 1/2 hours over 2 days is not enough, I feel guilty as it is!) Anyway my partner said this was my fault and I’m selfish for keeping him awake to talk to him, and took my LO in the other room!!!

Am I being unreasonable or was I selfish? I think I’m over emotional at the moment anyway and I don’t know if I’m being silly or not. I’m really upset, I feel so guilty already, and then to be called selfish for trying to spend time with my LO is the icing on the cake :(

I would have had the same response as your OH, yes you wanted to see him but his sleep is needed for the next days behaviour and for nursery. When I was with my ex this was a constant source of bickering between us, I was strict on bedtime and he wasn't but I was a SAHM and had to deal with the fallout the next day and he didn't.

I think you really need to ditch the guilt. Do that and everything else will fall into place.

Of course you wanted to see your LO and they wanted to see you, and personally I don't think cuddling up before bed for an extra 1/2hr is such a big deal.

If your LO has childcare that you trust and he is settled there, then you need to convey that to him. At 3 he could well be picking up on your guilt and playing up to it.

I have worked pretty much full time and have 2 kids. It is what it is. Do you enjoy your job?