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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want DH going through my stuff?

39 replies

Drinkandknowthings · 18/09/2019 18:10

I lost a purse today (well I noticed it missing today). There’s nothing hugely important in it, it’s just inconvenient.

I mentioned it to DH and he’s started going through my stuff to help me find it but I don’t want him to. I have nothing to hide but it’s making me uncomfortable.

But I asked him to stop and he got all offended and accused me of having something to hide.

AIBU?

OP posts:
LochJessMonster · 18/09/2019 19:03

YABU he was trying to help.

WonderWomansSpin · 18/09/2019 19:06

If you're annoyed because he's making a mess that's different from being annoyed about him going through your stuff.

TheWernethWife · 18/09/2019 19:11

My DP won't even look in my bag or purse even when I've asked them to (see if I have change etc), brings it over to me. Says it doesn't feel right going through a lady's bag.

Myriade · 18/09/2019 19:43

I would t want my DH to go through my stuff either tbh.
Not my handbag certainly or the drawer in my bedside table.

Just as I don’t though his pa jets in his coat etc... either.

Vulpine · 18/09/2019 19:46

That would annoy me too

littleorangecat22 · 18/09/2019 19:54

I don't like it either and also don't have anything to hide.

brighteyeowl17 · 18/09/2019 20:21

Thus bugs me when my hubby does it and says the same thing what are you hiding. Think it bothers me as I think by saying it he has a guilty conscience. I have nothing to hide that don’t like mess

misspiggy19 · 18/09/2019 20:27

Makes you uncomfortable? You sound quite bizarre

LemonPrism · 18/09/2019 20:34

Yes that's weird, he was helping you look because you just said you couldn't find something. That's a normal thing to do.

LemonPrism · 18/09/2019 20:35

Making a mess of it - that is unacceptable.

Monty27 · 19/09/2019 03:58
Confused Did either of you find the purse? I don't know that I understand the tone of this thread
Katzia · 19/09/2019 04:16

I was brought up not to go into other people's personal space( drawers, bags etc). So was hubby. He never goes in my handbag, even if I say" its in my bag", he'll bring bag to me to give it to me. He was brought up never to go into a lady's bag. Basic courtesy.

blackcat86 · 19/09/2019 04:43

We have this regularly in our house where DH loses something and stomps about dramatically because its 'lost forever' only for me to have a quick rummage where he's already looked and find whatever it is. He objects to me looking because I'm moving things and he's already checked but I get sick of the drama if I can find it in seconds. Last time I stopped and refused to help if he didnt want me to look. 10 mins later and he came back and thought it might be a good idea if I checked after all.....

meccacos2 · 19/09/2019 04:55

I wouldn’t like that....

I know the cleaner goes through our cupboards, I feel weird about my partner unpacking my things that I’ve shoved in boxes for some reason 📦

More of the “why have you kept this?” And any possible judgements.

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