In asking for your 'self care'/coping strategies?

[tvdinnertracks]

I know self care is a little bit of a wanky expression but it was the best way of putting it.

I've had a few knocks and big life changes recently. I'm feeling like I'm just about holding it together but my anxiety and depression is threatening to kick in. I'm teary and exhausted.

At the moment I don't want to talk to a doctor, although I will if I don't get a handle on things soon.

I'd like to know how others pick themselves up when they're struggling.

I'm trying to get outside and exercise but I'm struggling with the motivation.

I have been drinking herbal teas and trying essential oils (Dh is a little ).

I don't live near any of my friends and they're all too busy to chat very much.

What things do other people do (little or big, although funds are extremely limited) to kick their mindset up a notch?

I'm massively overweight which is part of the mental health issues and hindering sorting them out! It's seems so much harder to bounce back physically and mentally once you get over 40!

Do you work? Just wondering how much structure your day has?

I find it easiest to motivate myself if I have a diary for the day - shower, 15 mins yoga, cup of tea.. etc

So, my afternoon diary (in my head) is - home from work, cup if tea, put dinner on, go to gym for 30 mins, pick up DS from rugby...

Meal plan, no unhealthy snacks in house.

And, although it sounds completely crazy and my DH laughs at me, where possible, I imagine that I'm an A List celebrity when I'm doing these things. It somehow helps with my motivation...

I suffer from anxiety on occasion. What I find helpful is to make sure I drink enough water, eat fairly healthily, go for a shortish walk outside every day, (say 20 - 30 minutes), have some time on my own each day, and do something distracting such as a crossword, jigsaw, or recently I’ve started to knit. I’m not good at knitting, but it’s somehow relaxing.

@Cuddlysnowleopard we do very occasional part time work. There just isn't any work around at the moment. I do have some writing jobs but am finding I hard to motivate myself to do them!

I do usually do so much better with a scheduled day.

I tried to knit and it frustrated the crap out of me! I have really shitty motor skills. Jigsaws could work though. When I'm really anxious I play a phone game but that's probably making it worse.

I learn something new. I meditate. I vegetate. I binge watch. I stretch, as in very light exercises. I bake. I try new teas. I research things of interest. I actually work with Angels and have found this very good for managing my anxiety and depression.
Essentially, anything that brings you joy and gives you that feeling that resting and 'doing you' is not a waste of time. At least that is what works for me.
Ooh, and looking up books that I read years ago (if I can remember the title - if i can't, it falls under the research category :-) )
Enjoy yourself!!!

Drink at least 2 litres of waterca day, eat little and often - having stable blood sugar really does helps keep me on an even keel. Go for a walk, play music really loudly, have early nights - lots of little things do add up to improving your mental health

I try to carve time out during each day to do something for me. Go for a walk at lunch time instead of eating a sandwich while working; stop for dinner in my way home from work when someone else is collecting the kids; stop rushing everywhere!

My anxiety and depression is caused by me squeezing every last minute out of every day for someone else (work / kids mostly). I need to break that habit and make it normal to do things for me again :)

Ah it’s tough. I have suffered from depression and anxiety for years.

General self care-little or no booze, healthy food (not a strict diet but plenty of veg, fruit and not too much sugary or really fatty stuff), exercise (even nice brisk walks in the park will do, don’t need to be in the gym), spending time with good friends, limit social media/screen time.

One off stuff-nice bath with nice bath stuff/face pack, nice movie, early night.

Gardening in any form. Even if it's just bunch of planters inside the house

Get a lovely planner and some planner stickers and pretty pens and start to take control of your life. It's very soothing. Even just watching the planner videos on YouTube is very soothing, tbh.

Gardening!

Can you do some voluntary work? Or start a hobby.
Gives you a knew goal, an opportunity to meet poeple less time to wallow in self pity. May help you become more active?

Hi OP
Sorry you are feeling so down right now. I have a lot of practise in keeping it together to ward off depression. Ime, these are the thinsg that work best:

1. Sunshine and daylight. A walk or run or cycle is good but if you don;t feel up to it just take a cup of tea into the garden or park and sit watching nature unfold: leaves trembling, rippling water, bees collecting pollen, birds arcing overhead.
2. Small routines for physical care: daily shower or bath, face cleanse, teeth and hair and a bit of make up if you usually wear it.
3. Journalling. Especially: write down three things you are glad of each day. Anything from 'had a nice cuddle with the cat/chat with my sister online' to bigger stuff like 'booked a holiday/applied for a new job.' And make an 'At Least I list every day. Even if you spend most of the day in bed, write down what else you managed It will surprise you. At least I hung out the washing, fed DC and the cat, emailed my friend, had a shower (etc). This reminds your brain that you are still active, even when you feel stuck.

4.) IMO, the most hekpful of all: Do something new every day that you have never done before. It can be tiny: try a new coffee/tea flavour; walk a new road to work or school; look around a new shop. Build up to things you've always wanted to do or been curious about but never got round to and some things you are a little bit scared of (anything from small stuff like new tech or getting your eyebrows threded to more ambitious stuff like Go Ape. You can listen to new bands on you tube, new radio stations, try new scents of bubble bath, new recipes, sign up for free online courses, read a new blog or newspaper etc. I don't know why, but of all the things I did, this was the best. Keep note in your journal what new thing you tried and how it felt. You can download lists of stuff to try to get out of your cofort zone. There's loads online.

And all the obvious stuff, like drink water, eat at least five a day, go easy on sugar, coffee and alcohol, exercise, wear clothes you feel good in, watch comedies etc.

Hi OP - so, I like making things - 'crafting', if you will. I've made some brilliant things and some fairly crap things and have plenty of Phd's on the go (projects half done!). But it makes me feel better and happier generally. It can be difficult to set aside the time to have a go at something, but I find if I don't make the effort my mood is lower.

I can't do anything tricky or skilled like knitting or crochet, but I like wreath making, felt working and needle felting, hand sewing and pompoms and will glue gun pretty much anything to anything else for a decorative effect! New project is felt garlands and wreaths for Halloween. They don't have to be any good, just the making is what helps.

I visited a new craft shop last week - was lovely and has a tea shop, so I was in heaven - and while I was there another customer described it as 'her hospital' re: her mental health, so it's not just me!

Also, medication......

Hope you feel better soon x

Sorry for so many typos. Hope it's legible!

For MH, doing one new thing every day is a very good thing. It could be something as simple as taking a new route to go to work or the supermarket or a new herbal tea.

Otherwise, I always plan my evenings. I might do a few yoga stretches, take a bath, read a book, do some cross stitch etc.... something I enjoy doing just for myself rather than for other people iyswim.

Here are some of mine to help with anxiety, crocheting, spinning, EFT tapping, puzzle books, aromatherapy oils, reading, gardening. TRE exercises, lots of examples on YouTube. Relaxation and meditation videos, again thousands of these on YouTube, walking, tai chi, Dr Claire weekes audiobooks, counselling. Other things that distract are cleaning and baking. I will give most things a try to see what helps.

Hi OP, I have to recommend Yoga with Adriene on YouTube. I'm currently following the September calender and feel so much better.