Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To take a break from potty training after 6 weeks! Or persevere? Please help

41 replies

Napqueen1234 · 15/09/2019 19:17

Potty training DD2.4 for the last 6-7 weeks. Using sticker charts and treats as incentive. It was going ok but just hasn’t improved. She’s always used the potty, known what it was for and been proud about wees in it but she hasn’t progressed from going when reminded/prompted to asking for the toilet and as such still has multiple accidents at home and nursery (2-3 a day). She also will not categorically poo in it and sneaks off to poo every single day. Today it was twice with one on our nice rug 🤦🏼‍♀️

Part of me thinks we have done it for a while, she does wee on the potty and when at home and I watch her like a hawk and remind hourly or so we get no wee accidents just the daily poo which from what I understand is quite normal. However I do feel on tenterhooks and like I’m constantly mithering her. When asked she knows she’s mean to do poos and wees on the potty. We never tell her off just ‘oh dear an accident next time tell us/use potty’ etc.

Or do we have a break (for all of us!) and try again in a while when she may have more understanding and ability to identify the feeling of needing a wee. Will going back to nappies confuse her and end up taking longer? Nursery have a ‘three week programme’ they mirror at home but she just doesn’t seem to have got to the asking for the potty/toilet bit.

Please let me know what you think and if you’ve experienced an extended attempt at potty training then had a break and how it went. Thank you 😊

OP posts:
Napqueen1234 · 15/09/2019 20:06

Sorry for the long post please don’t get put off answering 😂

OP posts:
RolyPolyUpUpUp · 15/09/2019 20:08

Oh dear, this sounds so stressful for everyone. I would definitely just wait a little while and start again. It seems far too difficult and it does not seem like she might be ready?

Jeezoh · 15/09/2019 20:10

Leave it and try again in a few months. I didn’t attempt any of mine til they were nearer to 3, she doesn’t sound like she’s ready yet.

Hoppinggreen · 15/09/2019 20:11

If it’s not worked after 6 weeks she’s not ready
Give it a break for a couple of weeks and try again, if she’s ready it will be relatively easy

Mabelface · 15/09/2019 20:11

Yeah, take a break for a while.

Bringonspring · 15/09/2019 20:14

Take a break! Each child is different but both of mine got it within a week (not trying to be smug) but they were both fully ready.

Jent13c · 15/09/2019 20:16

I started potty training my son this morning and after his lunchtime nap he started asking to go and can control it until he gets on the toilet. Hes 2 yr 9m so s bit older than your DD. I think your daughter is not quite ready and if I was me I would stick to nappies for a little longer. It will just click for her but I dont think I could cope with the stress of watching her like a hawk until it does.

Have you tried the poo goes to poo poo land app? My little boy loves it and regularly tells me 'Poos are very shy'.

PourMeAGlassOfMilk · 15/09/2019 20:17

I'd take a break and go back to it. In a couple of months. Sounds like she's not quite ready if she's having multiple accidents a day. I have 3 sons and each of them has got the hang of potty training within a week when they were ready. When we tried earlier there were accidents left right and centre. Good luck.

Cantsleeppast3am · 15/09/2019 20:17

I'd wait. Potty training takes less than a week when the time is right.

Confrontayshunme · 15/09/2019 20:17

We tried at the same age and took a break with my eldest due to a tummy bug. At 2.8, she told us she was ready and did it in 3 days. However, second is 3 in a few weeks and is terrified of the potty, so I may not be the best guide! Wink

Pinkypurple35 · 15/09/2019 20:19

Yes I’d give it a break, mine took a couple of days to get the hang of it when they were ready.

DustOffYourHighestHopes · 15/09/2019 20:20

One month break then try again.

Hoppinggreen · 15/09/2019 20:21

confront ditch the potty and use a toilet seat ( you can get a travel one to take out with you). My DS never did a wee or poo on a potty and refused to even be in the same room as one. Once we just popped him on the toilet he was out of nappies during the day within a week

Jamhandprints · 15/09/2019 20:23

Have a break, she's really young. Maybe let her have a pants hour (after the daily poo) so she doesn't feel like you've given up.

whatthewhatthewhat · 15/09/2019 20:23

Stop.
Wait.
Buy a toilet seat with steps.
Forget the potty or pull up.

Try again at three.

Breathe. Drink. Relax. 😀

cformiaowy · 15/09/2019 20:25

Definitely take a break and start again in a few months. Honestly there's no rush and you don't want to make a big deal of it. It sounds stressful Thanks

Is she in pants? We found it made a massive difference when we just let ds go without pants/trousers at home with the potty in the room and he picked it up immediately once we removed the pants/pull ups. I think the snugness felt like he was wearing a nappy and confused him. We then introduced pants once he'd grasped it.

RainbowMum11 · 15/09/2019 20:27

Yes I'd def leave it a while, it will come naturally when she's ready.

Monsterpage · 15/09/2019 20:28

Tried it with my boy when he was 2.5 yrs and it coincided with the day the health visitor came. She told us if you have 2 accidents before lunch time and that continues for 3 days stop, give it 6 weeks and try again. We tried, he had the accidents and we left it 2 months before we tried it again - he asked. He had one accident in the first 2 weeks and he’s now nearly 7 and he has had about 4 accidents in his life.
I am of the opinion when they’re ready they’ll do it, weeks of misery for everyone is no good at all,

Napqueen1234 · 15/09/2019 20:30

Thank you all so much. I think we will have a 1 month break and then ask her how she feels about trying the potty again (she’s v vocal!). We do have a toilet with step we also use which she likes but have a potty downstairs as we only have an upstairs loo. Just used pull ups at night otherwise we have been using knickers (or more recently training pants to try and contain the 💩). Thanks for all your support. As with all parenting I feel this is a ‘failure’ (on me NOT DD) but actually it’s just part of the process!

OP posts:
MabelMoo23 · 15/09/2019 20:54

If you are wondering if you need to take a break then you most definitely do.

Forget about it for a few weeks. Honestly, when they are ready, it literally takes a couple of days. They just get it.

Bringonspring · 15/09/2019 21:38

Good point on potty bs toilet. We actually got one of those potty’s that look like toilets-very overpriced but did the trick!!

CecilyP · 15/09/2019 21:58

I started about the same time as you but gave up after a week or two- just too stressful. Put DS back in nappies for a month and tried again and he just got it straight away - total non-event!

richteasandcheese · 16/09/2019 07:04

If they are ready, they'll have it nailed in days. Stop and don't attempt it till she tells you otherwise

MissPepper8 · 16/09/2019 10:45

Yeah I think leave it for a few months, we tried DS as he showed an interest and wanted to sit on it nakey. He did 3 wees on it and the last wee he got a bit upset so we dropped it.

Have you tried books? I was given second hand Pirate Petes potty which we read every day and I leave potty in my livingroom so he sees it and still touches it and we talk about if he needs poos (he tells me now) ect.

So i guess what I'm trying to say is if you do break, make sure to try and keep it a conversation with her and keep her interested and talking about it.

Napqueen1234 · 16/09/2019 17:36

Thought I’d update how today went. DD not keen to wear nappy initially and asking to wear knickers so I put her in knickers but said if there’s lots of accidents we would have to go to nappies. Did wees on potty but then massive poo in knickers and asked herself to put a nappy on (think she was sad/embarrassed- obviously just reassured and cuddled her but gave her nappy and said no rush etc). Later she ASKED to use the toilet 3 times!! (One time false alarm) for the first time. still damp nappies throughout the day but asked to wear knickers after tea as I stripped her down as covered in food and was about to put new nappy and she said knickers please. Currently watching tv in knickers will potty next door.

Do you think this approach is ok? Going with what she wants, offering both and still encouraging potty? I must say it’s been a far more relaxed day for us both!

OP posts: