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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Maternity Leave on Probation

7 replies

CloudyVanilla · 13/09/2019 13:36

Hi,

I’m unexpectedly pregnant wit DC3 and found out the same week I handed in my notice at previous job and accepted new one, so had to go into new job telling them I was already pregnant.

Things had been going great but I’ve had a few major upheavals that I’ve had to deal with in my personal life, plus SPD and fatigue already from pregnancy.

I want to request to start my maternity leave ASAP at 29 weeks to help me cope with everything that’s going on, as my manager has started to be a bit funny with me and that is only adding to my stress.

Does anyone know where I stand with regards to taking mat leave fairly early on probation? I am on a 6 month one so if I left in early November I would be finishing work several weeks before the end of my probation. Can they refuse this or is entirely up to me regardless of my job status?

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 13/09/2019 13:42

You'll be entitled to leave but not maternity pay. You could claim maternity allowance instead. They cant refuse your leave as its you who chooses the start date.

leghairdontcare · 13/09/2019 13:45

That's fine, you just have to give correct notice.

"At least 15 weeks before your due date, tell your employer when the baby is due and when you want to start your maternity leave. Your employer can ask for this in writing.

Your employer must write to you within 28 days confirming your start and end dates."

Gov website - www.gov.uk/maternity-pay-leave/eligibility

CloudyVanilla · 13/09/2019 13:45

Thank you that’s what I wanted to hear :) I’m aware of the pay but I asked if I could take annual leave before my maternity start date and no one has got back to me but since explaining to my managing all the stuff going on instead of being sympathetic and understanding why I would want to start leave and get it out of the way, my manager seems to have become a bit snippy with me and suddenly lots of things I’m apparently doing wrong are being brought up Confused

OP posts:
GeekyDory · 14/09/2019 07:23

Ok what I'm about to say is hopefully over-reacting as I'm feeling triggered by your story. But not to tell you I feel would be irresponsible, if I'm right, as not telling you early enough could be detrimental to you. I've been reading posts on Mumsnet for a while but have joined in order to reply to you.

It's sounding suspicious. Join a union. Then make it known to them that you've joined one. If you can't join one, casually drop into conversation you have a friend with a legal or union rep connection (hopefully you have one, but if not think of me instead ;-) )

Keep a diary of what you told them when, and what they're telling you when. Be REALLY factual, but include how you felt afterwards. Print out/forward to home all emails that are in any way related to your employment status, pregnancy and performance. Look up and print off/email to yourself at home the disciplinary procedure, the pregnancy policy, and disability policy. These might be kept in an "employee handbook".

If there are any meetings, especially last minute ones or "can I just grab you a minute in private?" Type stuff, TAKE SOMEONE WITH YOU, even if it's someone from their HR dept (request if HR can be involved). Keep your own notes in the meeting, even if they're making their own, even if you feel they trust you. Send a follow up email to them summarising the meeting. If they refuse to let you bring someone with you, ask if you can record the meeting AS A REASONABLE ACCOMODATION for your pregnancy-brain. Link below contains useful information in any case...

www.dma-law.co.uk/is-it-illegal-to-record-conversations/amp/

Remember that HR are there for the company's benefit, not yours. But they will inform your boss if they're breaking any rules. But meet with HR anyway.

These mistakes you're making - send an email specifying which ones you made and what you're going to do to avoid doing them in the future.

I have an invisible disability and this is sounding familiar.... I have been sacked in the last year, from a medical establishment, during my probationary period. I believe in an underhanded way after I had a report back from Access To Work that suggested accomodations that were going to cost them £500, plus extra time for certain tasks that were written in might have to be permanent adjustments. I happened to make a mistake at the time that with anyone else they would have supported and trained, but they pinned it on that. In the "can you just pop upstairs for a minute, boss and boss' boss just wanna see you?" was my notice meeting. They said verbally that the amount of support they were giving me for the disability was unsustainable long term, then told me about the mistake I'd done and why (it is a fireable offense to be fair, but often taken with understanding). I wasn't given any disciplinary meetings beforehand or any warnings. In the letter afterwards it only stated the issues with the mistake. In probationary meetings, the minutes afterwards never specifically mentioned my disability, or any emotional struggles I was having, even though I talked about it and how I was working towards meeting my needs. My Union couldn't take on the discrimination case because there was a less than 50% chance of winning, because there was no direct written evidence of discrimination, and I did make that mistake after all and they made it all about that in official documents. In my new job (and on new medication) I'm doing much better.

geekone · 14/09/2019 08:06

@GeekyDory fellow geek that sucks and I am sitting here livid for you 🤬

Glad you have a new job and have moved on.

CloudyVanilla · 14/09/2019 10:48

@GeekyDory thank you so much for this. I actually have had a “meeting” which was just me and LM to suddenly point out lots of things I’d been doing wrong, I had hoped I was being paranoid in thinking there was a correlation between my request for early mat leave and this quite sudden change of attitude.

I totally agree with you and while I’ve decided against my original, somewhat reactionary plan of writing down everything LM says to me, I’m going to make a meticulous log of all I’ve done.

I hope this is just a misunderstanding/personality issue but I am in a precarious position and I don’t want to take any chances!

OP posts:
GeekyDory · 14/09/2019 12:33

I don't think you're overreacting by keeping that log. It's a very good idea in fact.

Make notes of that meeting now, and send a copy to your manager and HR. Perhaps your manager's manager as well. But only if you feel that's appropriate. Include something about how surprised you were and how (s)he didn't seem to voice any problems before you said about mat leave (with time and date if possible). Something like that. Only state facts, and let them speak for themselves. Otherwise you're making accusations they can deny. Request that for any further meetings, that HR is involved. Refuse to go to any meetings or chats without their involvement.

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