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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Well it shows initiative, but...

29 replies

ReanimatedSGB · 11/09/2019 16:05

We could not find DS' school tie this morning (DS has a habit of burying items of clothing). So he had to go in without it. I knew from previous experience that the school keeps a stock of spare ties and, if kids have enough in their dinner money account, they can just buy a new one, and I thought that was what he would do, though I did bollock him about carelessness and unneccessary expense.
He came home tieless and I asked about it.

The little sod had told a teacher that as the school uniform is officially gender neutral and girls didn't wear ties, he wasn't breaking the rules by not wearing one.

I'm actually quite impressed and think he will go far. AIBU to admire the quick-thinking but also to be a tiny bit concerned that they will find some way to pay him back for this?

OP posts:
TheStakeIsNotThePower · 11/09/2019 16:07

I'm impressed. Good on him!

dudsville · 11/09/2019 16:07

Wonderful. I hate ties. Why tie a noose around your neck willingly?

SoupDragon · 11/09/2019 16:07

😂

Di11y · 11/09/2019 16:08

he'll start a revolution! no ties for anyone in 2 weeks mark my words.

chickenyhead · 11/09/2019 16:12

Be proud, very proud

Original poster
ReanimatedSGB · 11/09/2019 16:14

Yes, I think I will maintain a 'that's my boy!' attitude. It certainly wouldn't hurt the school to make ties optional as they are an absolute nuisance, even though they are clip-ons.

OP posts:
Gottobefree · 11/09/2019 16:17

Quick thinker ! he's a smart thinking one. Be impressed and worried

Bobthefishermanswife · 11/09/2019 16:19

I'd be proud and a little afraid, that boys going to go far!!

summersherewishiwasnt · 11/09/2019 16:19

Not sure how I feel about this. Which toilet will want to use? Changing rooms? He has found an important issue and twisted it to suit his predicament.

ButterflyOne1 · 11/09/2019 16:21

I'm totally impressed with him. I'd be lobbying to get all ties removed now. I've never known a school to make only boys wear a tie.

BogglesGoggles · 11/09/2019 16:22

I love that. I should probably send mine to board lest they turn out completely hopeless like me

chickenyhead · 11/09/2019 16:24

Wah...

He has displayed knowledge of equality issues to point out inequality in an archaic requirement.

The fact that he did it on the spot and was confident enough to assert himself respectfully is what many of us want for our children (minus the mess mountain)

hazell42 · 11/09/2019 16:25

@summersherewishiwasnt

He said the uniform was gender neutral. He didnt say he identified as a girl.

This isnt one of those threads. And God knows there are enough of them. This is a thread about a boy who used a bit of initiative and a whole lot of Face to get out of trouble.

Chill

slipperywhensparticus · 11/09/2019 16:27

Well....what can you say to that!

Contraceptionismyfriend · 11/09/2019 17:39

I've only patented up to the age of 5.

But that's something that would get a biscuit in this house! Good thinking!

FourEyesGood · 11/09/2019 18:04

I didn’t realise there were still schools where the boys have to wear ties but the girls don’t - that seems utterly bonkers!

Original poster
ReanimatedSGB · 11/09/2019 18:15

He's very nearly 15, diagnosed as 'high functioning autistic'... and he is on the school's Equalities Committee. So if they find themselves having interesting times with him....

OP posts:
chickenyhead · 11/09/2019 18:59

Well he gets my vote x

TeenPlusTwenties · 11/09/2019 19:05

How can they claim to have a gender neutral uniform, and then say boys have to wear ties but not girls? That's a very clear example of not being gender neutral!

CSIblonde · 11/09/2019 19:05

On the one hand he's smart, but on the other, twisting a controversial issue to meet your own ends is highly manipulative. If its a pattern, I'd be uncomfortable tbh.

CSIblonde · 11/09/2019 19:08

*Sorry, using not twisting. The antiquated uniform policy aside, does he usually do that with other situations where's hes in trouble?

Contraceptionismyfriend · 11/09/2019 19:45

I wouldn't be worried at all. I'd be comforted that he's going to do just fine into adulthood. It's not being manipulative it's using the materials that you've got around you.

Improvise, overcome, adapt. He's basically Bear Grylls.

TraceyHorrobin · 11/09/2019 19:53

I was wondering the same, how is the uniform gender neutral if it's different for boys and girls?

fluffyjumper · 11/09/2019 20:16

Good on him, quick thinking.

Original poster
ReanimatedSGB · 11/09/2019 23:09

I think, myself, that the school may not have thought through the idea that their uniform is 'gender neutral'. But I have bought DS a spare tie, and we have agreed that he will put it in his pocket, if he wishes (he may just decide to wear it tomorrow and nothing more will happen). I have also told him very firmly that, if he chooses to try and pursue the matter, he is to be absolutely polite and calm about it.
(But if he has started a small revolution in the school, I will, equally politely and calmly, have his back.)

OP posts: