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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask how you felt buying your first house?

13 replies

UsernameUnavaliable · 11/09/2019 12:43

So DH and I are seeing the bank next week to enquire about a home loan. We are living in DH's house which he bought before we were together but it's too small now for us. We are looking at buying a house and offering £167,000. I have never had a loan that big and I get quite nervous. One minute I'm very excited and the next I feel like vomiting. Is this normal?

I must add, about 4 years ago our main employer of the town we live in went into administration. The company was bought out and although thinks are still a little shaky, things seem to be improving slowly. This house for what it is, is really cheap. We could raise a family in it and never move. What do you think?

OP posts:
MediocreOmens · 11/09/2019 12:47

I think what you are feeling is perfectly normal. I am very nervy about money and credit and I felt the same buying all the properties we've lived in as the mortgage got bigger each time. After a while you don't even think about it, it's just a bill like any other (although the one I always pay first). It just becomes part of life and I don't think about it really.

BrightYellowDaffodil · 11/09/2019 12:48

Totally normal. I was hugely relieved to finally be buying but I was absolutely terrified at the responsibility I was taking on!

UsernameUnavaliable · 11/09/2019 12:49

I am a very nervy person. I truly believe after my employer was put into administration, it scarred me a bit. I used to be more easy going. DH and I tossed around the possibility of moving but we want to have children soon and we want to have our family nearby. There are a lot of "glass half empty" people here who keep saying that the company may shut down. It keeps making me feel uncertain I suppose

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Neptunesgiraffe · 11/09/2019 12:49

I was euphoric up until about 10 minutes after I bought my first house, then I felt sick with worry. I felt like this for the next few weeks. I used to wake up in the night worrying that my house had dry rot, or a hole in the roof, or the structure wasnt sound. But I am a worrier. I also bought the house on my own and I was fairly young. I also stopped feeling like that in time and enjoyed the house.
I bought a house a few years back with my OH and felt absolutely fine about it. :)

HotChocolateLover · 11/09/2019 12:51

Are you sure you want to do it through the bank? I would seriously recommend a mortgage broker. Ours was fab and found a great deal. They often have access to mortgages that us mere mortals can’t find online/at the bank.

Spam88 · 11/09/2019 12:53

When we reserved our house (new build) we drove home in silence, then opened and drank wine also in silence. The sales woman remarked several times throughout the process that we didn't seem very excited. We do love our house though!

Sparklesocks · 11/09/2019 12:55

We are looking to buy for the first time too OP, I feel overwhelmed and anxious with the whole process so you’re not alone!

MorrisZapp · 11/09/2019 12:55

I was thrilled and excited! Hello Northern Rock! I must admit I didn't consider any possible downsides. And there have been none, I'm paying my mortgage off in two months time. Home ownership has given me so much security, I'm just gutted for today's generation who can't bloody afford it.

Ofalltheginjoints · 11/09/2019 12:57

DP and I are currently in the process of buying our first home.
I feel utterly sick with worry about the whole process, we have our decision in principle and our offer has been accepted, we’ve submitted all documents and the mortgage survey is going ahead this week but I’m really worried something will go wrong.

I’m trying not to get ahead of the process and thinking about the new house and decorating etc but there is some excitement there, DP is relaxed about the whole process!

I’m not worried about my job it’s stable (as much as any job can be) and DP is self employed it’s just the waiting until the mortgage is confirmed bit!

We used a broker recommended to us via building society and they’ve been excellent definitely look at that as an option too and good luck!

OhMyGodTheyKilledKenny · 11/09/2019 13:00

I was excited but scared at the same time.

Although I was buying with DP he had only recently become self-employed which meant his earnings couldn't be taken into consideration for the mortgage so it was all in my name.

I was petrified that if he upped and left me then I would be up to my eyeballs with a massive debt (I didn't actually think he would leave me but worrying about it was all part of the nerves of buying a first house).

Thankfully he didn't leave me Grin and we're still together over 20 years later

UsernameUnavaliable · 11/09/2019 13:06

Sounds like these feelings are pretty common then! I keep thinking about hosting Christmas in our new house, haven't even made a bloody offer yet!!

@sparklesocls good luck in the process to buy :D it's a stressful/exciting time!

OP posts:
HappyParent2000 · 11/09/2019 13:08

Not much different to moving into a rent when it’s a new build...

UsernameUnavaliable · 11/09/2019 13:11

That's true. Plus, my dad just told me on the phone that there are always people in more debt than me Grin

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