AIBU to struggle to declutter teddies despite desperately needing space?

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DS is now 12, he no longer wants or needs most of the teddies and soft toys that he's had over the years.

It's quite a big collection. For a long time he was really keen on soft toys, taking loads to bed, playing with them, lining them up endlessly etc etc..

Most of them hold memories for me- of where we bought them, DS playing with them etc etc. I find the thought of parting with them really really hard, which I know is pathetic!

They are in great condition, most look new and I really need to get rid of them as they are taking up too much space. Does anyone else find this really really hard?

I've had no issues parting with baby clothes, toys etc. but I'm really struggling with the soft toys!

Any advice anyone? Is there a good cause I could donate them to, or maybe I could sell them (cash is tight but I don't have much time).

Would it help you to give them away if they were going to children who would otherwise have no toys to play with?

You'd be sharing your son's happiness with them?

My girls are only 6 & 2 so we still have a large teddy collection but we have a very small house so we have to rotate them up to the attic every now and again.

My husband is completely opposed to ever getting rid of teddies as his mother threw out all of his when he was at school when he was around 9 and he’s still traumatised.

If you really don't want to get rid of them yet you could put them into one of those vacuum storage bags and suck the air out. Unless the quantity of them means you would need more than one bag.

Vacuum pack them and put them in the loft , you can cram loads into a big vac pack that’s what we have done with all the ones with sentimental attachment .

I would first check that your DS would be okay with having them rehomed - my mum used to give our things away, sometimes forcing us to give items up when we really didn't want to. Painfully, I've had to do this myself as DS has tons lots of things and just doesn't bother with them any more and storage space is limited. I've charity-shopped some things and secretly stashed some in the loft.

Maybe your DS would be OK with keeping one or two favourites you could put in his wardrobe. They're still accessible if he wants but hidden away from general view?

We also have a large basket of cuddlies, some from my childhood and some of DS's, at some point I will have to be ruthless and rehome the majority, but I will bag a selection and store them away.

It's very hard when they have faces and look so trusting...

I used to have the same problem - not with teddies, but with other objects connected with happy memories.
Once I realised it was the memory I cherished and not the object, it became much easier to get rid. I take a picture, which is as useful as the actual object to trigger happy memories.

Look at the Marie Kondo method of decluttering.

She recommends picking up the item “thanking” it for all it’s done, and then recognising that it no longer has a use and the memories attached are in your head rather than held by the item itself. Then turf it out.

Sounds massively woo but I’ve found it a great help when doing baby clothes clear outs etc

Thank you for the replies and for not slating me for being such a softie!

DS seems happy for them to be rehomed, but he is in the throes of establishing his independence so I will definitely keep some of them (goodness knows how I will select which).

Yes it would really help if I could give some to children who had very little.

The vacuum storage bag is a great idea, but I can't help feeling that I need to earn u can't hang onto everything!

Get DS to choose which ones he wants to keep and which go to a good cause of his choice?

Alternatively, you could use them to stuff a bean bag case, and they can be sat on if needed!

Just been sorting through my lovely old mas things after her death.

She had kept (I knew she had) some things of mine - teddy baby blanket some early ‘art’ and also of my siblings. She would have said she had kept it for us but I’m not so sure. I found it touching when I opened the box and we sorted through. We got rid of some things (saying ‘thank you ma’ was strangely helpful with some things).

At some point I will get rid of the few baby things I kept which for now are very comforting and I can’t let go.

For all the sorting and decisions-we’re having to do now I wouldn’t wish my ma had thrown it all.

This post goes against my general feeling of ‘stuff isn’t what’s important, let go of it’.

Look up the Teddy Trust on Facebook - you can send them your good condition bears and they’ll send them to war torn areas for children.

I’m on a decluttering thread and also facing this issue. Another poster mentioned “The Teddy Trust” that rehomes them to refugees. That is where ours are going when we get to the sort out

I kept all of mine (and there are a LOT), and now they all belong to DD I'm just pushing the difficult decisions into the future

OP I'm exactly the same. Ds is 15 and I have 2 bin bags of soft toys in the boot of my car. They've been there for about two years (no joke).

It he or you that are struggling? Be sue I know by the time my boys started high school we only had their one baby teddy from when they were little left- and even they ended up under the beds.i remember them both laughing when I asked if they wanted to keep any and I had the ‘why would I want soft toys?’ Comment off them

MIL kept all of DH's toys and he had a lot of them (single mum, dad would lavish expensive presents on him to make up for his absence).

We are having to sort through them gradually (it's taking hours) every time we go to see if anything can be used by our boys, and if not, charity or bin.

The soft toys are my real bugbear. DH can't remember where/when he got 90% of them. He can't remember their names or anything. And they're pretty yucky. but he hates throwing anything out just like his mum

I did a massive sort out at the beginning, based on their condition and meaning.

My DS2 loves soft toys and has loads. I already know which ones will be easy to part with, and which won't.

I recommend taking photos of all of them, and maybe putting them in order of the most precious down to the least.

I kept 5 cuddly toys. 3 are too precious to let DCs have them. 2 I've passed onto them. DH has only declared 1 as too precious for the DC (cuddly toys here got thrown around a lot by DC1)

@HeronLanyon so sorry to hear that you've recently lost your mum 🎉.

It's interesting to hear that you don't wish that she hadn't kept so much- as I do sometimes feel that I shouldn't store difficulties up for DS by keeping too much sentimental stuff that he will eventually become responsible for dealing with. It sounds like it's been a comfort for you though.....

@IsobelRae23 it's definitely me who is struggling. As I said in my OP, DS seems happy for them to be remhomed but I feel I should keep a few back just in case!

I'm so glad to her that it's not just me! @WilburIsSomePig that's so funny that you've had bags in your car for ages- I feel your pain!

The teddy trust sounds absolutely perfect except that I'd have to post them to the pick up location, cash is tight!

My sister gave some of her soft toys to the local women's refuge where a lot of the children had no toys with them.

One toy was a large parrot & this little boy was enthralled by it.

My sister couldn't take them as the address is secret but she has a friend in the police who took them.

@tierraJ that's a brilliant idea. I'd need to find out how to get them to a refuge- I could probably ask for a contact on Facebook.

OP, I'm the same. I recently got an old toy out to get rid of and he looked up at me with his old, soulful eyes and I just couldn't do it. Brings a tear to my eye just thinking about it.

Maybe start with the easy ones, if there are any.

Thank you for the replies and for not slating me for being such a softie!

Tucked away in my wardrobe I have a 30+ year old teddy that I made at school from one of those kits you could get. he is lopsided and badly made, but I simply cannot throw him out. And nobody in their right mind would want him as a "new" toy (he looks his age too).

He'll stay with me forever.

Yes @SandAndSea that's it, it's the cute faces and eyes. Argh! I find it so hard, I think part of me believes get are real. Sigh.

Sorry typo: 'they are real'