AIBU Threads Ending Up in The News Worldwide

[texasgurl]

I'm only starting this thread because I now live abroad. I joined Mumsnet when I still lived in the UK. I've lived in another country for nine years. It hasn't escaped my attention that many of the threads that originate from Mumsnet end up in the news, not only in the UK, but all across the free world. How is this happening? Are there journalists snooping here who are fishing for light entertainment articles? Are there real members here who need to make money and sell the stories on to news outlets? WTH?! I feel like a site that is dedicated to mothers helping mothers should offer them some degree of protection. It's shameful that people don't feel like this is a safe place to reveal who they really are and cultivate real relationships with other members. It's not an authentic safe forum, and that is problematic.

Well it is a public site so anyone can read it.

Plus a lot of it is made up shite

It's the internet OP! It's not a closed club you know....everything on here is fair game. Once you put it out there, it's open to anyone to reprint or use.

YABU. And naive.

IDK. Some places should be closed communities, IMHO. If you are okay with having your personal circumstances spread across the globe and ridiculed, I guess this isn't really the place for any rational person to ask for guidance. I guess that's what you're suggesting, HennyPennyHorror.

I feel weird about this too as a thread I started under a different username became a news story. That’s why I tend to change names every couple of months or so:

YellowArdvsrk, none of us should have to change our names in order to feel safe. This is bullsh*t. This isn't Reddit. It's a community for parents.

Texas no it's not the sort of place to share your deepest private concerns or problems. It really isn't. You can complain all you like but it's a business...if you've been lulled into thinking it's some sort of "safe space" for parents, then more fool you really!

If you want to speak to other parents privately, why not start a support group or something? This kind of place is rife with trolls and idiots...and yes, journalists. I come for the banter and also because there's some excellent information given out here by people who know a thing or two about various subjects.

Op, you really are funny. Mumsnet is free, costs you nothing to use and yet somehow you expect your privacy to be protected.
Free internet sites don't work like that. If you don't want your personal details to become public knowledge don't post on a public site.

Aberhonddu there are many online forums that are free, and 'cost nothing' to members, and yet, there is an understood code for confidentiality. I don't know why Mumsnet has adopted an atmosphere where women have to constantly create new profiles in order to join in discussions or ask basic questions, but that is just insane. This site isn't in the best interests of women or mothers. It's just a sensationalist site. That is what it's turned into.

I agree with you OP.
However you will get multiple posts saying ...it's a free site, ..'the internet', ..that posters are niave to ask for advice on IRL personal issues and 'deserve' what they get it journalists pick up story. Because there have been multiple versions of this thread about privacy concerns/ this issue on MN site purporting to be for advice and support.

Some posters would rather just call you stupid for raising this point than engage in a discussion of trying to find if there is a solution / more protective way that MN, the site, could manage or try to prevent it.

It is lazy journalism, they don't ask & get permission from OP, so its hard to see how it is in public interest to share people's personal stories to a wider public than intended.

MNers join MN as it's a self selected group (usually of parents or those interested) on a website with moderators. Likely a different subset of people to those reading generic news.

I agree with your update too Texasgurl

Why do you think Mumsnet is any different to reddit?

They're both free at the point of use websites. They may have different audiences but both of them rely on people clicking on their page to make money.

Journalists can come on here (the same as they can any other website), lift a thread and post it as an "article". They don't have to ask anyone's permission. They take stuff from reddit, Netmums and all sorts of other Internet forums.

Personally I wouldn't splash my personal life across the Internet for thousands of strangers to read anyway. If I needed help, I would keep it as anonymous as possible and I would definitely name change. Not because I think it'll end up in the papers, but because people I know IRL read this site and I don't want them figuring out who I am and subsequently knowing my business!

It doesn’t really matter how you feel about newspapers lifting threads from MN OP. You can’t prevent it personally and MN have no motivation to even try as it brings in ad revenue for the site via increased visits and is free advertising. People will continue to use the site as it’s free therefore worth the compromise of it not being confidential.

Don’t post here if you’re not happy for whatever you write to be shouted from the rooftops. That’s what posting here is, it’s a free public forum anyone with internet access can use and view.

For confidential support you need to find a therapist as they’re bound by codes of conduct and have strict rules about confidentiality. YABU to expect that same level of confidentiality from a business that exists to generate revenue and whose T&Cs you already agreed to when you made your account.

Some places should be closed communities, IMHO.

So what would this look like in reality? For it to be open to you and I to use it’s also open for a journalist to use. What’s a closed community look like in terms of online forums? Anything that allows joe public like you and I to get involved means being unable to exclude journalists and then you’re back at square one. Even making it a pay site wouldn’t prevent threads being lifted as journalists would subscribe to access stories and nobody would have any way of knowing who was sharing outside of the forum.

I’m genuinely asking, what sort of model do you think would work to make MN a ‘closed community’ and be practicable?

It's an open site. A lot of Reddit threads end up in the MSM too . They all sell on to each other. I can guarantee something I read in Bored Panda or Sifted Sister will be in the DM, then the Independent etc. Ditto stuff that is in my local paper, often makes the national press, with very little in the way of changed words either.

FWIW my local papers no longer have desk based journalists, they all work from home and lift stories from loval gossip pages, be that burst water main at so-and-so or ooh the police are down my road. They also pay for photos.

there is an understood code for confidentiality. Unless your real name is Ms Texas Gurl rather than Annie Oakley I think you're pretty safe.

there are many online forums that are free, and 'cost nothing' to members, and yet, there is an understood code for confidentiality.

Sites like what? I would be interested to know what this looks like in practice.

Sites can promote the idea of confidentiality as much as they want, but unless it's a private forum which you need some kind of administrator approval to join, you can't prevent non-members from viewing it or reproducing stories posted to a public site.

And even if you did try to make mumsnet private by requiring a password to view the forums, how would that stop journalists from signing up and trawling them anyway?

Mumsnet doesn't have the power to invent laws. They can't insist on confidentiality when there is no basis in law for doing so. They offer a platform and it's up to their users to make decisions about how to use it safely.