Dealing with a self centred friend when you’re ill

[Debra0001]

I’m now have physical issues and my friend I’m travelling with is fully aware. She’s a really good friend except a bit of a hypochondriac and liking the better share of attention. My issue is when we’re away I normally let her have the better bed/bedroom as she’s older but I can not do that this time and suggested we take equal turns on the sofabed but she looked horrified and didn’t comment. I’m worried she’ll come up with excuse after excuse and I’ll be on the sofabed again whilst she’s in a large comfy double room. As this is the norm. I’d be so resentful this time I don’t think our friendship would survive it. I have EDS and chronic pain. But she still talks like she’s the one who is poorly if it comes up. I’ve known her 20 Years and never known any doctors diagnosis, hospital treatment, medication etc. Her partner even says she dramatises ailments. Help! What can I say to her that won’t ruin our trip? Thanks

You have EDS and she makes you sleep on a sofa bed??? She's not a friend OP...she's a habit.

Since you've planned it already...I would speak to her before you go...make it very plain indeed that the sofa bed is not ok for you every night.

Say "I'm sleeping in the bed on the first night and then we'll take turns"

If she doesn't comment, press her...say "So that's the plan...I can't and won't sleep on the sofa bed nightly...not happening"

And wait. Then when you get there, put your things immediately on the bed...if she tries to complain or get there before you say "Did you forget? I said that I'm having first turn because of my EDS..." and move her things.

Some people need to be TOLD properly.

Fuck that I'd be cancelling or booking another room.

Make sure you stick to your guns as outlined above and next time book two bed accommodation.

If she tries to make excuses just firmly say 'nope, my turn tonight'. You must put your foot down, you shouldn't be on a sofabed every night with EDS

Why can’t you stay somewhere with two equal rooms with proper beds?

As someone with EDS, None of my friends would even consider me taking the least comfortable option.
This woman does not sound like a friend at all.

Frangible if that wasn't an issue I'm sure they'd do it! Not everyone has the bloody budget for separate rooms!