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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To give dog up?

14 replies

kelliparr · 07/09/2019 14:05

I posted a few weeks ago that I had recently got a dog from the kennels.
He had been abused badly.
Anyway he had bit my boyfriend when he tried to wash him and growled at me and showed teeth for no reason.
Anyway today,he was happy wagging his tail etc
Sat on my boyfriends knee and I went over to stroke his head and he lunged at me (no growling or teeth showing ) and bit my leg then bit my arm.
No blood or broken skin as I had my coat on and jeans.
I'm heartbroken
Do I give him another chance or do I give him up?

OP posts:

neversaw · 07/09/2019 14:09

I wouldn’t be comfortable with that at all OP, but I really hate aggressive dogs so that colours my views.

BubblesBuddy · 07/09/2019 14:10

No. Don’t give him another chance. I’m very sorry this has happened and it would appear he has not been rehabilitated. You really cannot trust him and how could you trust him when out walking without a muzzle on. What about his behaviour around children? His behaviour would make me think he’s not a suitable pet.,

I’m not sure if you are an experienced dog owner. If not, this dog should not have been given to you. Talk to the kennels immediately. Are they a dog rescue? Tell them what has happened. His biting would worry me a great deal.

SconeofDestiny · 07/09/2019 14:13

You already knew he had been ill treated so would need a lot of care and attention to get re-settled.
Presumably, you had a plan to help him settle including taking advice from a behavioural specialist?
What has the behaviourist advised?

Nancyjuice7 · 07/09/2019 14:14

He didn't bite you for no reason - he bit you because he didn't like being washed.
It takes months for a dog to adjust and become part of the family. You've only had him a short time and he needs time. There is a group on fb that has good advice : www.facebook.com/groups/374160792599484/

Stompythedinosaur · 07/09/2019 14:24

I would say that washing the dog so early in your relationship was probably not a great move.

This dog sounds like they need quite careful handling, so I wouldn't judge you if you didn't feel you could offer it.

Original poster

kelliparr · 07/09/2019 14:24

Today he bit me for no reason.
He was sitting on my boyfriends knee and I went over and started stroking his head (which he loves and always wants me to do )
He didn't growl or show teeth,he just dove for me and attached himself.

OP posts:

Original poster

kelliparr · 07/09/2019 14:24

We haven't attempted washing him for a month now and that's the last thing on our minds.

OP posts:

thirdfiddle · 07/09/2019 14:30

Hmm, could it have been that he didn't see you coming so was taken by surprise? He hasn't developed any sores or anything that you might have hurt? There usually is a reason if only you can figure it out.
But no YWNBU to say you can't do it if you feel out of your depths.

Aprillygirl · 07/09/2019 14:32

If the dog was lying peacefully half snoozing, I suspect you made him jump when you reached out to stroke his head. He has been abused and will be a lot more on edge than other dogs so you have to go very carefully with him for a good long while yet.

Stompythedinosaur · 07/09/2019 14:34

I would say that if the dog bit it definitely doesn't always want you to do that! I also wonder whether you made him jump.

It sounds like a complex dog to look after.

DontForgetToDeadhead · 07/09/2019 14:35

Where did you get him from? You should be able to call the kennels and discuss this with them. At the minimum it sounds like he needs some sessions with a professional trainer but it might be that he would be better in an experienced home. Good luck.

TruthOnTrial · 07/09/2019 14:44

You've got trouble there, and I'm disappointed, yet again, about his being unsuitably rehomed.

Noone wins here. You need to take him back before he causes serious harm, and in the meantime keep him off your laps, or sofa, etc where he is guarding and get him a comfy bed to settle in. Don't take him out without a muzzle on.

WeAreStardustWeAreGolden · 07/09/2019 21:14

When we adopted our extremely nervous dog, I didn't attempt to bathe her for a few years or indeed brush her as she was that damaged. I found other ways of keeping her tidy and as groomed as I could. It was terribly hard and I despaired I would ever be able to handle her properly. But we persevered and it has taken the best part of eight years to get her to a point where I can handle her properly. Slow steps. Some steps back and then forward again. I would not be without her now. She is the most loving animal I have ever had. You need to look for small subtle signs which if you are not an experienced dog owner can be missed.

Sparrowlegs248 · 07/09/2019 21:16

He didn't bite for no reason. You just didn't see a reason. He sounds very protective. And difficult. You certainly wouldn't be unreasonable to take him back. Always such a shame when this happens.

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