To offer a stranger a tissue?

[dudsville]

Honestly, I was waiting to see a thread about this as I saw her typing away afterward! I will presume for now she was not a mner or that she just had better things to communicate about.

I take the same train everyday. I sat next to someone I had seen before but we have never exchanged any pleasantries, it's a commuter train on a busy line. She sneezed and proceeded to seem to struggle with lots of sniffing and nose wipes with furtive clothing touches after.

I've thought about this before. If I was ever in that situation I would be very grateful if someone offered me a tissue.

So, I offered her a tissue.

She did not want it. All fine. But of course I sat there neurotically pretending that what had just happened was perfectly normal. It wasn't normal, was it? I crossed a social barrier that says we must ignore others at times like these???

dudsville I wish you'd been on the tube with me this evening! I had an awful sneezing fit and couldn't find a tissue - I was trying not to sneeze/drip/sniff for ages (with everyone looking at me like I had the plague! 😳)

I was sat in A&E once with my mum, and an older women, I’m assuming was mum, was with her daughter who looked to be her early twenties with special needs. She was sick and was sick over her hands. So I got a packet of wet wipes out of my bag, and walked over and offered them to mum. She took about 6 out, said thank you very much, wiped her OWN hands, then put the wipes in the bin.

Several people then looked at me wtf? And I just shrugged my shoulders. I was just trying to be nice and help out.

I once offered a tissue to a lady on a train.

She took a phone call and it was obvious someone she knew had died. She started crying so I offered a packet of tissues. I felt so sorry for her, finding out something like that in such a public place.

I think you were being very kind OP.

I gave a tissue to the filthy scumbag I saw spitting (as in huge throat hawk and splat) on the floor of a tube train once. I told him he was disgusting and he needed to wipe it up.

He did too!

It was one of my proudest moments.

mind you , there seem to be so many people around these days with hair trigger reactions I would probably just tut loudly and give him a death glare

Yanbu. I suffer from terrible hayfever in the summer and am usually pretty good at having a handy stash of tissues, and it's horrible when you don't. I have been very grateful to strangers who have handed me tissues, and I'm sure they were glad that it stopped me sniffling!

I used to get nosebleeds but they'd come so randomly and so badly that I'd often be caught without enough tissues. I often had strangers offering me tissues and I was extremely grateful for them!
This happened to me not long after i started a new job when i was about 21. I was completely unprepared and a lady offered me some tissues. I was embarrassed but very grateful although still turned up at work with blood over my clothes and bag!

@Skinnychip not from the nose but that happened to me once, was on my way to a job interview and went absolutely flying running for a bus, didn't realise how bad it was too a nice lady sat next to me with a packet of tissues (there they are again!) to help me clean up. Did the interview elbow to toe in blood. Didn't get the job.

I would have asked. I have handed over tissues to a woman who was having a long argument on the phone which descended into her pleasing and sobbing. I had no idea.l what was going on because it wasn’t in English but I suppose you guess a fair amount by tone. I was prepared to have my head bitten off but she seemed grateful then came over as she got off the bus to say thank you. She looked a little happier so I hope it was just a daft boyfriend tiff.

However when I was very very pregnant I had the mother and father of all nosebleeds on the tube (it was fairly empty) and people actually edged away from me as I tried to mop the flow with my (then very) bloody white gloves. It was one of the few times I didn’t have any hankies on me but I found a coffee shop serviette in my pocket and ended up sticking it up my nose to stench the blood.

Always offer. People have their own opinions on these situations, so don’t feel bad if they feel awkward and say no. My dd has regular nosebleeds after a trauma to her nose last year and had a heavy nosebleed on a bus when I was taking her to school when I forgot her tissues. I asked everyone on the bus if they had wipes or tissues and the only person who had any was a lady who had tissues covered in make up. She assured me they weren’t covered in anything nasty and I gratefully accepted 😏 I’d rather mop up blood with make up tissues than my dd’s uniform get covered (it was that heavy I’d tried to mop it up with my coat and both my sleeves where saturated). Like I said, always offer but don’t feel offended if they refuse

I am an incorrigible pack rat. My friends and family know I can usually be counted on for tissues, bandaids, paracetamol and lots more. I even carry around baby aspirin in case someone starts having a heart attack (they can apparently help).

I always offer a tissue or even a full pack. I don't remember ever being turned down.

You were much nicer than me. I was waiting for my kids to finish a sports club, and the older club was going in after (18/19 year olds). One sneezed and started to use his sleeve and I said "don't use your sleeve" And handed him a tissue lol.

I offered baby wipes to a couple with a daughter having an ice lolly related disaster at an English Heritage place in summer. Their kid was too old to have wipes still hanging about, but they looked v happy as they were struggling with a half used tissue which the girl was not cool with touching

YANBU, I'd have been so happy to get a tissue if I was having a snot panic...

Once, many years ago, when I was about 20, I was crying on he bus because of my then bf being a bastard. A lady gave me a tissue. This was 17 years ago and I still occasionally remember her and her kindness. :)

If it was crumpled I would have said no but if I watched the person take it out of a packet I’d of accepted lol. My manager once offered me a ‘clean’ tissue she had shoved up the sleeve of her top. Clean or not, no thanks and especially not if it’s been sat snuggled next to a bare arm in a woolly jumper.

My friend does this all the time. She cannot stand anyone sniffing so she always has tissues to offer strangers 😂

I would’ve been very grateful and not at all offended - I hate sniffing too!

My son once did a ridiculous sneeze on the walk to pick his sister up, there was snot everywhere and I was just stood in the middle of the pavement trying not to spread it everywhere. A teenage boy walked past, stopped, and got him a tissue out of his bag. It was a genuinely delightful moment as he was the last person I expected to help me! Such a simple thing but I still remember it.

Even though DS is 7 I always have wipes and tissues in my bag, can't remember how many times I've offered them out. Never had a bad response.
Not long ago at Alton towers I also handed out after bite stuff to two women who'd been stung by wasps.
Maybe I just shove it in their faces so quickly they don't have time to refuse.

I have offered tissues, once on a bus journey, because I had endured the lass sniffing her way through an hour's journey previously. She declined politely but I think she did attempt to sniff slightly less after that.

Offered to a co-worker who sat beside me. He had horrendous hay fever and was very grateful.

Is there not a fear of the likelihood of being smothered for persistent sniffing?

Because I used to be very socially awkward, hated putting other people out, very shy etc if I had been in need of a tissue and you had offered me one I would have said "no, that's ok thanks" then immediately regretted it. I would have then spent the rest of the journey trying to work out how to ask you for the previously offered snot rag and agonising over whether or not it would be ok to ask for it.

With how I have changed recently there is a bigger chance I would accept a proffered hankie, but I can't guarantee I would be brave enough to accept one.

Few years ago, on the top deck of a bus heading away from the centre of Brighton towards Hove (come on lady, let you be on MN) I was sat a few in front of a lady and presumably her boy, not sure what his age was. He was obviously really ill, and very noisily sniff-snorting what sounded like head custard, constantly. I felt so sick. It went on, and on... So I turned and tried to look kind, and offered a pack of tissues for the boy, via his mum. Who politely declined, as her precious little Tarquin continued to produce vom-inducing snorts.

Luckily my stop came.

@managedmis
But I have/had headphones, so my comfort wasn't the driver, not that this was your implication.

^^

What?

She was wearing headphones, couldn't hear so she wasn't offering a tissue for her own benefit

goodness that happened to me once on a plane. nose suddenly started running like a tap and the man next to me wordlessly passed me one of those tiny packets of tissues. I was kind of embarrassed but very grateful.

Maybe the sniffing was nervous tics.

A woman I know vaguely from the school run had her child throw up in the supermarket she caught it 🤢 I put loads of tissues in her hands to help clean it up the checkout lady grabbed the wipes she didn't really have a choice but to be helped