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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Weight Loss before & after pictures.

101 replies

FluffyPaws01 · 06/09/2019 09:02

I'm willing to accept IABU but I am not a fan of them in the slightest, if anything I think they are damaging & unessassary. I can't quite work out the need or thought process which leads people to post them.

Help me out do I just need to pipe down hahah!

For context I am a healthy weight size 10 before anyone tries to say I'm envious.

OP posts:
LifeBeginsNow · 06/09/2019 10:16

I love the real life ones. The Body Coach has daily pics of people who have completed his workout programme and the difference is fantastic to see. It's not just about the weight loss, they look toned and fitter too.

When I'm able, I'm going to do it and I will take photos. I think weight loss can be so gradual it's difficult for the person on the journey to notice much difference.

Stop raining on everyone's parade!

ShirleyPhallus · 06/09/2019 10:19

I don’t really understand what you’re trying to say OP. You seem very angry at someone or something but not sure why. There’s a huge disconnect between the topic you’re posting on and your attitude

Hederex · 06/09/2019 10:21

I can see your point actually OP.
I have binge eating disorder and have been size 6, size 26 and everywhere on between several times over.
Luckily after therapy and a lot of hard work I am coming out the other side.
I think it's fine to have pictures, show them and be proud of them, and they are good to inspire, but the reality is that those used in advertising can often be insidious.
My mum's SW magazine, for example. Page after page of unflattering holiday snapshots next to heavily doctored studio pics of radiant afters. 'I used to have three chocolate eclairs for breakfast, now I simply tuck into some overnight oats and the pounds have simply fallen off and my life is unrecognisable'.
It's seductive but for the vast majority it isn't achievable or realistic.
To lose weight long term, you're better of focusing on the reasons you overeat and on day to day lifestyle rather than a specific long term goal.
When you're slimmer, your life isn't magically better. When you're overweight, you're entitled to live, not just wait to be slim.

NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace · 06/09/2019 10:25

I've shared mine many times. And will continue to do so as appropriate.

Sorry, OP but I'm not especially bothered whether you like them or not Blush

PurpleDaisies · 06/09/2019 10:27

This is a really odd thing to get upset about. I don’t understand how those pictures could be damaging.

NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace · 06/09/2019 10:27

Yeah and perhaps I have had my own weight loss journey but haven't felt the need to post these kind of pictures?

Perhaps you have. But always bear in mind that .... I am not you!

MsHopey · 06/09/2019 10:28

Tess Holiday is part of the body positivity movement, she claims before and after pictures make being fat seem worse than being slim because you are celebrating the change of weight loss and making larger ladies feel worse about their weights.
Now, I am obese, I have a lot of weight to lose, I struggle, but I'm glad I won't accept myself the weight i am, because while it is upsetting it means i am still trying to do something about it rather than resigning myself to bad joints, diabetes, heart problems, and increased risk of cancer, etc.

chocorabbit · 06/09/2019 10:30

I have no idea what everybody tries to achieve as it depends on the person, frequency etc. But generally I am happy about people who have lost lots of weight and now feel great. It is also a great motivator for other, overweight people to start their weight loss. I have seen it happen!

MyLucifrr · 06/09/2019 10:31

Because a weight loss journey (a significant one) is very emotional for a multitude of reasons.

People can post significant things in their life.

MagentaRocks · 06/09/2019 10:32

I am proud of my pictures showing my weight loss. They show it isn't just about numbers on the scales but shape change from having a healthier lifestyle. I haven't posted them anywhere - only shared with a select few but when I get to where I am happy I probably will post before and after on Instagram or somewhere. I have worked bloody hard to lose weight and get fit and although I still have a couple of stone to lose I am proud of what I have achieved.

I love seeing before and after pictures as it inspires me to keep going when my binge thoughts try to take over.

ElizaPancakes · 06/09/2019 10:33

You’re entitled to have any opinions you like. You might not like that in other people’s opinions, your opinions are goady and unkind. That’s how opinions work - sometimes people disagree with them.

You haven’t elaborated though on why you think they’re damaging - they’re clearly not unnecessary as lots of people find them inspiring. If you’re fat and seeing another person happy about weight loss makes you feel inadequate or unhappy, then maybe you’re not quite as happy with your weight as you make out?

ShirleyPhallus · 06/09/2019 10:35

Tess Holiday is part of the body positivity movement, she claims before and after pictures make being fat seem worse than being slim because you are celebrating the change of weight loss and making larger ladies feel worse about their weights.

Tess Holiday is obese and I’m afraid I don’t think that should be celebrated

MythicalBiologicalFennel · 06/09/2019 10:35

YABU they are powerful, motivational and positive.

I cannot relate to any of your posts TBH

P1nkHeartLovesCake · 06/09/2019 10:40

Maybe they lost weight and are proud of themselves and after years of not liking the body they had they now want to show it off.

It’s a personal achievement, it took some work. Why shouldn’t they be proud?

They aren’t hurting anyone by posting the pictures. Good on them I say, doesn’t matter what you do in life there is always someone miserable sod like op 🤷🏻‍♀️

colourlessgreenidea · 06/09/2019 10:40

Well clearly you were not willing to accept you're being unreasonable.

Brand new MN-er (‘healthy size 10’, of course, with the added drip-feed of having had their own weight-loss journey) starts goady thread about other people’s weight loss.

I’m not sure a discussion of whether they are or are not being in reasonable is what they were looking for from this thread Wink

Belfield · 06/09/2019 10:42

Its to help with weightloss for others. The before and after show the journey visually. If you just say I lost 2stone then people would say great but if you actually see how different people can look it can be motivating. I don't see how this could bother you tbh. I am not overweight myself but think it is great when someone has the courage to tackle their weight. YABU

frumpety · 06/09/2019 10:42

I prefer looking at weight loss before and after pictures than hearing the phrase 'weight loss journey' , can't help it , it makes me squirm. Sorry.

Fatted · 06/09/2019 10:42

OP, your original post does read as pretty goady. You don't mention the reasons why you don't like them or find them damaging. You don't mention your own story other than you're thin. So it's quite hard to understand why you don't like them other than you don't. Which makes it difficult to have a decent discussion. Perhaps if you had written more of your subsequent posts in your original post, there would be a different tone to this thread.

I am pretty on the fence about them. I understand why people do them and how others find them useful. It's motivational and inspiring to others. It's a celebration of someone's success after a lot of hard work.

But I can also understand that perhaps they can be damaging. Like after photos with someone who is clearly underweight. I also think it's more helpful to have the 'full picture' or story on someone's weight loss. I hate it when I see amazing before and after pictures only to find out that the person achieved their weight loss by living off nothing but fresh air and coffee for six months.

WorraLiberty · 06/09/2019 10:48

but yes I do think that for some people seeing these images is damaging to their self worth & self esteem.

And for some it's motivational

Different strokes and all that.

MyAuntyBadger · 06/09/2019 10:50

My dd lost five stone over two years and looks fantastic, but we saw her fairly regularly over the two years and I don't think it's possible to fully appreciate the difference when you see it as another few pounds every couple of weeks. A before and after pic really shows the stark contrast.

hsegfiugseskufh · 06/09/2019 10:50

YABU I think they're helpful actually, you can see your progress, its motivational! Much more motivational than the number on the scales IMO.

you almost seem bitter about people succeeding?

ChippingInLowCarbing · 06/09/2019 10:51

The before photo stigmatized as bad and the after good for dropping weight? This isn't sending the wrong message to people?

IF your motivation is ‘sending the wrong message’ then can I suggest there are far more damaging issues you can direct your anger at than people posting their genuine ‘before’ And ‘after’ photos.

You could maybe start with people posting about their ‘not me, I’m a size 10’ stealth boasts.

ISmellBabies · 06/09/2019 10:54

I love before and after photos, they're motivating and celebrate getting healthy through effort and hard work.
Yabu and come across as a bit of a nasty thick knob tbh. Maybe stick your worthless opinion up your perfectly healthy size 10 arse.

frumpety · 06/09/2019 11:00

Peoples self worth/self esteem are not necessarily linked to their weight though. I know a lot of people believe they are or should be, but that doesn't make it true.

IAmALazyArse · 06/09/2019 11:00

YABU massively.

I can't wait to post mine once I lose because it's bloody hard work! Same way like I will happily post my degree once I get it. Because it too is bloody hard work.
People are allowed to show fruits of their hard labour.

I have no idea though hmm but yes I do think that for some people seeing these images is damaging to their self worth & self esteem.

Literally ANYTHING can be that to some people. 🤷