If I'm not BU, how can I word it so that I domt necessarily hurt anyone or cause drama.
I have an aunty, and her 4 girls. One of her girls is my age, the middle one is my sister age and then two youngers ones (one newborn).
The older we have gotten, the more competitive my aunty has made things.
For example, she will not, and cannot buy her children a single thing without it being s designer brand. They have designer everything. They had Ted bakers bags bought for Christmas when they younger girls were 7&9..
We've always had nice things, the occasion expensive or designer gift, but we wasnt bought up to think everything had to be designer.. and I bloody love a bargain!
But aunty would comment on our clothes not being designer ect. I then got a really good professional apprenticeship, I was given alot of praise by other family but NY aunty didnt say a word, then my cpsuom failed her a levels, got an apprenticeship and was given tonnes of praise by everyone.. but she quit and never finished it and has never stayed in a job longer than a year.
I worked really hard to save up for a nice little car.. and when I mentioned proudly that I'd bought a car, she bought cousin A a much newer and very trendy car literally a week after. Everything has been trying to one up anything I do and it makes me feel like shite.
My sister feels the same way as shes started with her and cousin B now. My mum sees it, but days never to call her out because she wants to keep the peace and not upset my grandma with any falling outs.
For context, she told her daughter to stay with her drug boyfriend because he comes from a very weathly family and if she sticks with him she wont need to work..
By now on 20 weeks pregnant. She so far asked so many questions about names, clothes, brand of pram ect and I know it's so she can be nosey and then slag it off.
I feel like:
A: I've always felt like she is toxic, I dont want to feel like when babys here she will judge everything about her and slag off every detail.
B: Because she has a newborn they will be similar ages growing up. I felt the competition between me and my cousin, my sister feels the competition between her and other cousin. I really dont want my little one to grow up thinking everything she does isn't good enough for those family members. I dont want them to laugh of shes wearing a primark or asda coat. I just dont want my child feeling anything like shes not good enough for them.
So I want to cut them off. My sister agrees, but I know that my mum will want me to just smile and keep the peace.
I dont talk to aunty often as we clash, my tolerance for her is becoming so low that I've started to say enough is enough, but then my mum gets upset. But shes very into newborn babies and gets broody easily. So I know when I've given britney she will suddenly be my best friend and want to come around and cuddle her all the time.
But i just want her our of my life without upsetting anybody else.
How can I do it?