AIBU to remind you to be careful with "first day" photos?

[AChickenCalledDaal]

Just seen a friend's "first day at secondary school" photo online. Two happy children, in recognisable school uniform, next to a clearly readable little sign that displays their very distinctive house name and the street number.

AIBU to remind people that there's little point nagging their teenagers about internet safety, if their parents don't follow simple precautions themselves?

I have a blanket policy of not posting pictures of my dc on social media. A - they're too young to consent, and B - it's showing off.

Realise I'm in the tiny minority there

All i need to do is follow the fb account, wait for the holiday posts, or day out, nip round, be in and out with everything valuable with very little risk. I also now know names, kids ages, grab a couple of documents and a bit of online fraud is an option too...

Very few people have the 'follow' option on FB, usually the person has to accept the request to be friends. Unless the person's account is open you won't be able to see their holiday posts.

I'm also interested to know if there have been any actual cases of paedophiles using back to school photos to somehow access a child?

It's not just about online groomers. I have a job which regularly involves upsetting members of the public who then may seek retribution against me. It does sound a bit melodramatic but it has happened to colleagues who have been targeted at their homes. I do not want these people to be able to find me on line. I don't want them to be able to find my kids online. I don't want them to be able to find out where my kids go to school and are when I'm not with them to protect them.

The worrying thing is that my DC school aren't really on board with this either. They keep moaning at me all the time about why won't I permit their photos going online, it makes it awkward if they're in the background of some other kids photo etc.

YANBU OP.

And I think the generation of DCs being raised with their parents plastering pictures of them all over Facebook and Instagram are going to have a backlash against it when they are older.

I'm guessing the mum thinks her friends already know where she lives and her address.
Plus you're assuming almost open access and you don't know that to be the case.
Someone could look at a photo on my facebook and assume all my facebook friends can see it but they can't. I have different lists so only close friends and family see photos of my DC. And even then there's some pics I'll limit down to one or two people.

It’s the difference between being a hard target or soft target. Putting out all that information on FB where friends of family and the friends of those friends can see it makes your child a soft target.
Like any predator, a peado is more likely to go after a soft target than a hard target. They won’t need to follow your kid from home and risk being spotted by the kid or CCTV because they can already get that information courtesy of a back to school snap online. They can plan their whole groom and kidnap operation from the security of their home.
A little known fact is that paedos will target single mums with children. They will groom and date the mum to get access to the children.

You can’t just follow someone on Facebook. It isn’t Instagram.

Local criminals tend to knock on your door in person to try and scope you out. They won’t bother with Facebook unless it’s vindictive.

It feels like people are worrying about this but missing the much bigger picture.

Oh, yes, the old “I trust FBs privacy settings” when FB was fined for not actually implementing them and also selling information marked private to 3rd parties (Cambridge Analytica scandal).

FB also covers up successful hacks where such information is regularly stolen.....just google “FB hack” and you’ll have a dozen ways to hack anyone’s FB in seconds.

I honestly agree with you OP.

I try to limit the stuff I put out there for a reason.

OP YANBU.

Posters have focused too much on a gremlin climbing through the window to take the child, but the risk is identify fraud and/or general security risks. Just a bit more care needed really.

A little known fact is that paedos will target single mums with children. They will groom and date the mum to get access to the children.

How is this a little known fact?! People don't know this?!

As for FB privacy settings - there are plenty of people I would consider no more than acquaintances that I am friends with on FB and I know how many DCs they have, their full names, exactly what they look like, what school they attend, their house street number and name, etc. A lot of people don't think twice about locking their profile down and post whatever they like about their DCs.

I don't understand why people don't make their accounts private, it's not difficult. I share photos of my kids with family through facebook as we live a long way from them, but my account privacy means that only friends can see it, not friends of friends.

I thought that was a very well known fact.

I agree op. We had a year six girl who was being groomed online using the information she had posted in photos, one of those being her clearly identifiable school uniform. Thankfully nothing came of this as an adult monitoring her account spotted what was happening. But the risk is real and care should be taken.

I’m with you OP. Would I let my 16 year old post a public pic on Instagram with her full address? No way! So why would you do the same as a parent, particularly with young children who might not be aware of the photo and the implications it could have. Possibly it would be fairly easy to find out the children’s names through a root around on social media. Friends of Friends basically means you have no control over who sees your photo
I am shocked daily by parent's lax attitudes to internet safety in this day and age. Child sexual exploitation is on the increase and we all need to be vigilant.

Doomsday were people really so naive that they didn't think FB was selling information? It's the entire business model. If you're not paying for a product then you are the product.
As for hacking, as soon as you opt for digital photos then you're susceptible to hacking.

I agree with OP.

I think everyone is relaxed until something actually happens.

It’s rare but things do happen .

I know a lady who has some absolutely stunning primary school age / younger daughters .

She was contacted by the police because a suspected paedophile somehow had photos of her daughters .

She’s now very careful with who has access to photos of her children.

I dont know a school that doesn't fully engage with social media to the point of Twitter, Facebook, whatsapp groups for parents ipads for pupils and smart phones for copying down H/W from the whiteboard.

@AChickenCalledDaal - *Does the school have parents' permission to pass on this information?8 you seem a little out of the loop - parents have to sign an authority for their childs image to be used. Same way a school will know if a child is part of witness protection or adopted and not use that child in publicity

No one but family give a shit, so just post any pictures to a family whatsapp group

But then Linda that I worked with in Greggs in 2006 won't be able to admire my little angel!!! #mummieslittlegirl #mini-me #bigschool #blessed #isitginoclockyet

I agree OP

Not so much from pov of a paedophile but from identity theft. Anyone can now know those children's names addresses school and if their parents are the type to post, most likely their date of birth as well.

I insist that my son wear an oversized raincoat, trilby hat and stilts until we are clear of our street. Better safe than sorry!

Iggly no, you can't just follow someone, true - but many people make FB friends with people who are passing acquaintances, friends of friends they've met once or twice in the pub. How well do you know that colleague you worked with for 6 months 10 years ago?

When people have 100s of FB 'friends' they need to be more careful.

The issue isn't so much now - but what about a few years down the line - your kid for whatever reason gets a dodgy stalker. It won't take much for them to track down key information from social media that can be used to gain trust/legitimacy.
Similarly how about stealing of identities - it may seem farfetched but kids who have had their whole lives documented on social media will turn 16/18 in a few years and may find that they have been 'stolen' for someone else to get driving licences/passport/bills that then allow them to run up credit debts...
Also its not enough to say my facebook is set to private - how many friends of friends are seeing your information pop up on their news feeds. I've had quite a few unknown children pop up in mine over this week...

The covering up of the school logo that I’m seeing more and more of is all well and good so long as you’re not giving away other identifiable information elsewhere on your profile.

For example, a relative of mine has a public Instagram page and posted the other day about how proud she was of her daughter for getting into Grammar School, complete with a picture of said daughter in her new uniform with the logo blurred out.

Except she’s got her location listed in her profile and given that there are apparently only a handful of Grammar Schools in that area, it would take no more than 5 minutes for someone to identify the school.

@AmIRightOrAMeringue
Exactly, parents who post 1st day of school photos are very likely to do a post “guess who is 8 today?” With happy smiling child #growingup #bigkidtoday #littleprincess

They don’t realise the information all adds up....