To be really excited about going to work tomorrow?!

[DueToBeDecimated]

I'm reaching the end of my mat leave and starting some KIT days to ease me into the saddle. I am so looking forward to it but then I picture my LO with a massive grin and so happy to see me and feel really guilty that I'm so looking forward to not spending all day with him tomorrow. Not to drip feed but I've struggled with the latter part of mat leave (& posted here under a different name) feeling bored, overwhelmed, stifled. I'm actually returning to work a month earlier than planned. Although tomorrows only a KIT & I'm excited to go, theres part of me that's feeling this guilt and even worried I'm going to regret going back early once the mundane day to day kicks in and I hardly see my LO outside nursery hours.

AIBU to be looking forward to work tomorrow?

Some of us just aren’t the right people to spend all of our time with our small children. Don’t get me wrong, I did extended breastfeeding and coslept with my preschoolers (and beyond) but I also had a need to spend some of my time on different challenges. And that’s ok. Best thing is if you can find a balance.

I loved going back to work. No regrets here. I hated maternity leave and found it mind numbing.

@31Stickybeaksid thank you! This has been exactly my problem. Baby groups have been... not what I expected. I was considering going to the weighing in clinic today just for something to do but he thought of baby small talk with the other waiting mums filled me with dread

Yanbu. I adore being a mum. I follow a lot of attachment parenting styles but I also work full time. Working keeps me sane...I need to use my mind and be challenged to stay happy.

I'm fortunate as a teacher that I get long periods of time off with my son. However it reminds me that I enjoy working and it reminds me that I think full time stay at home mums are amazing women!

@pleasedontbreakthechain yeah, I'm planning to return fulltime but my boss is, in principle, open to me doing 4 days/week so i need to bear in mind that's an option open to me if I need to shift the balance when I return

@Pinkflipflop85 yes! I have SO much respect for SAHMs. I genuinely dont think I could ever do it, it's such hard work! I hope the return to work will allow me to relish the time with my LO more

I love my kids, I love spending time with them. I absolutely love being a mum. But, im not just a mum. Im also bloody good at my job and I love doing it. Being a working mum fulfils me. My kids are thriving and happy. Do not waste one second feeling guilty. Have a lovely day.

I was the same OP, I thought I would love being a SAHM but going back to work has been the best thing, for me and for the family. I love him with all of my heart, but I believe that the balance has made me a better mum (this is just how I feel for me, not a comment on anyone else's choices etc). I don't feel guilty as I know that he really enjoys nursery and gets to spend time with other babies rather than just me or half an hour here or there with baby groups- and they do activities and crafts I wouldnt be able to do in the same way. I only work part time at the moment, the days we do get off together (4 a week) im so present and the time we spend together is quality time. Also get to see him in the mornings and for dinner and bedtime routine when I'm working as well, it did take some adjusting but please don't feel guilty. It helps to get a bit of you back.

My first full day back I think I spent the whole time going back and forth to the kettle and the canteen. Uninterrupted meals!! Hot cups of tea!!

@Tippety I think that's what really thrown me. I really expected I would be this Mother Earth figure, loving all the baby groups, out and about all day everyday. I tried to maximise my mat leave as much as i could with annual leave etc before it started. I think that realisation it wasnt what I expected was difficult for me to accept, I'd set these really high expectations for myself and I didn't live up to them. But I think these are other people's/societies expectations. The amount of various tradesman that I saw for various reasons at home that would say "my missus didn't go back to work after our first! [Sly look to husband] Be careful!" Which was a double stereotype as I earn more than my husband and had no intention of being a kept woman!

@JesusInTheCabbageVan hahaha!! YES!!! I might even take my cafetiere in and treat myself

YANBU I love being a parent, but in love being ME too. I love talking about normal, one-child related things. I love being challenged and using my brain. I even love my commute I enjoy the feeling of achievement I get from working, which is totally different to the buzz I get from having a great day with the kids. Dont feel guilty at looking forward to going back to work, and dont let anyone make you feel guilty

Of COURSE YANBU. Being at home all the time with kiddiewinks doesn't make you a better mom. If you like your job that's fab. Some women want to stay at home forever, and some want to return to work, and neither is correct or wrong!

Hope you have a lovely day tomorrow. And work continues to be great!

As well as motherhood!

Actually that should be neither is WRONG!

YANBU!! I loved mat leave and I loved going back to work and having adult conversations and running away from cbeebies!!

I was a SAHM for nearly 2 years. I love my DS, and love spending time with him, but I realised I couldn't be a SAHM. I needed to be mentally challenged and to do something for me.
So when the opportunity came up for my DH and I to swap rolls we both jumped at the chance (DH hated his job).
I love being at work as well, not having to be "on" all the time as a parent. But when I come home from work/ spend one on one time with DS when DH is at work at weekend, I treasure our time together more.
DH also loves being at home with DS (when he's not at nursery 2 days a week), they have a lot more fun together.