To bleach my mouth?

[AnnonniMoose]

I took a sip of my lovely hot coffee. Felt a lump under my lip - on the inside of my lip! Realised it was the fucking bluebottle that had been buzzing around the room . It had settled on the rim of my cup and I hadn't noticed. Spat the mouthful of coffee all over my keyboard and desk and I've been furiously wiping my lip with a towel.

I had a fucking bluebottle touch the inside of my lip! AIBU to want to bleach my mouth, my face, my whole body and the whole bloody house?

I’ve also eaten half a maggot inside a strawberry. Always cut them in half now.

I did once lick and suck a dead wasp. I took a drink of coke and noticed that one of the ice cubes felt kind of furry and warm. You know that thing where you’re trying to find something and you know you’re using an inefficient method but convinced that you’ll have it any second now so the time changing to a different tactic would be wasted and you just keep going? I did that. So I ran my lips over it, my tongue, kind of sucked it into my mouth slightly. Finally realised I was getting nowhere with that method of investigation so I pulled the glass away to use my eyes and there it was.

I jumped up, spat everywhere and frantically scraped at my mouth for a good few minutes. My family were pretty embarrassed but I had basically just been engaging in foreplay with a wasp so I think it was justified

Erggggghhhh I took a swig of daddy long legs water once.... bleach wasn't enough.... blerggghhhh

I also took a sip of water from the glass on my bedside table last week and felt something furry. Switched the light on to find a huge moth floating in the water. Yuck!

Sorry guys, I win...

A NEWT in my KETTLE!! It took a long time to fancy hot chocolate again.

I ate a slug in a potato as a kid it put me off for well over ten years.i can still feel it now this baked slug 😫😫

My kitten woke me up patting my nose and cheeks the other morning - was totally adorable til I realised he had shit on his paws 🤮

OP you clearly don't have enough spiders in your house.

I can't decide what is the worst - a fly/bluebottle, a slug or a maggot. Or a boiled newt in the kettle. Ugh.

@GladAllOver - I have a shitload of spiders - I live in the middle of forest! And they all seem to be pregnant. I also have those sunflower stickers on my windows that kill dozens of flies every day. I don't know where they're all coming from - perhaps the pig farm at the edge of the forest?

@Spinzy 😂😂😂

a fly/bluebottle, a slug or a maggot. Or a boiled newt in the kettle

That sounds like a quote from a Roald Dahl book!

@Spinzy I did once lick and suck a dead wasp

Is this one of these pervert threads I was warned about on the internet?

For the record, bluebottles and greenbottles are blowflies.
They don't sit/ feed on shit- they feed on cadavers (the females need the protein for their eggs).
Not sure but think that's probably worse

Uh...thanks for that @throwinshapes goes in search of the extra strength bleach.