I just made a report to NSPCC

[Spanckd]

And in scared. I'm scared of my ex, but I'm concerned about his child. I have a child with him, and I witnessed for years the way he treated his other child. I was always there to protect her, and I feel extreme guilt for letting it go on. I was being abused too and now I worry about her every day. It was emotional abuse, and she made disclosures to me about some physical abuse such as punching and banging her head off a wall. I reported this immediately to SS but they didn't even want to speak to her. I was advised to call the NSPCC and I have. In waiting for a practitioner to call me back. I have witnessed this abuse, and I know that she is emotionally not safe around her father. She is only 6. I am so scared that her mother is going to be angry, and that her dad is also going to go mad. I am so scared I am creating a bigger mess for myself but I couldn't just let it go unnoticed. Please tell me I've done the right thing?

Can you get in contact with her school without putting yourself at risk? It seems that schools are best placed these days to actually do anything constructive. You’ve absolutely done the right thing. You care about that little girl.

It’s shocking how children are failed over and over again by agencies that are meant to help them. How many more fucking “serious case reviews” will it take before child services in this country actually come together to perform the job they are supposed to.

Oh, love, that must have been so hard.

You've done the right thing and you've been incredibly brave. Well done.

sadly (& as there are so many cases) I cant remember the child name _ but the childminders reported a concern about a child - but social worker etc ignored them - eventually the child died under horrible circumstances & there was a big court case. I suspect the ss are so over stretched which is why they referred you to the Charity - I seem to remember being told that the RSPCC have more rights of entry than sw (on some training course about abuse years ago)?

You absolutely did the right thing. I don’t see why the child’s mum would be angry at you it’s not her you are complaining about. She needs to know if her child is being abused to protect her.

Can you and the mother team up for moral support against this monster? Can you reach out to her? In a way of ‘let’s get through this together’?

Contact the school too. Anonymously if you wish.

Call SS again. Report it again. Pretend to be a neighbour if you have to.

You are doing the right thing.

You are absolutely doing the right thing plus you have the courts on your side.

Here's a link which maybe useful,call all the numbers and agencies on the list even if you've contacted them previously.
www.gov.uk/report-child-abuse

Get support for yourself and disclose all details,all counsellors have a duty to safeguard. Victim support have some good advice and links too
www.victimsupport.org.uk/crime-info/types-crime/childhood-abuse.

Good luck, I'll be thinking of you and urging you on.

OP - as others have said, you are extremely courageous and have done the right thing. I hope that the NSPCC take action very soon. They are a wonderful organisation who work with families - they don't blame or judge unless there is blame and judgement to be laid at a particlar door. They will help this poor little soul's mother (who is doubtless also abused) to get out of the awful situation they are in.

I'm quite shocked at SS not bothering - but perhaps they think you are just being vindictive ("a woman scorned" and similar bollox). If the NSPCC get involved nd contact them, then they will have to take action.

This poor child must be so frightened and unhappy. You have done everything you can to help her. It is out of your hands now, except when she and your DS visit each other - then you can do your best to make things lovely for her, even if just for a few ours.

Unfortunately much of SS's time is being taken up because of erronepus reports made by A&E departments every time a young person harms when usually they end up in A&E because CAMHS has failed to provide an iota of support. So really it should be CAMHS reported for neglect and/or incompetence.

Would save SS so much time if other services got their act together.

You have done the right thing but you now must prioritise your safety and your own child's safety - hopefully that's what the little girls mother is doing too.

i know your scared op.of course you are.it must be a shiver down your spine every dam day.have you had help.
the fact youve reported this shows how far youve come though.you must see this.so yes,you might have been hurt and brainwashed.but youve recognised and sought help for someone else.to save them now,that is amazing.and shows your taken your own strength back from him,taking his power away.
it will get better,in fits and starts and waves and forwards and fearful backsteps but it will get better.
keep yourself safe.emotionally too.
keep breathing,and try and let all the emotions like clouds, all come and then go.because your safe now.you got away.you fought a brave. fight and are now free.

Thank you

Please put down this guilt you're carrying around, it is part of the abuse and it belongs to him, not you.

What you did was so brave. Many many people don't have the courage (not bad people, just terrified and beaten down by abuse) but you did.

I hope somebody acts now to get that little girl away from him.

Absolutely you did the right thing. Good for you.x

They haven't called me back yet. meant to be calling me before 5. Hoping they're not going to fob me off :(

Of course you've done the right thing. Well done, that can't have been easy. I'm glad the wee girl has someone looking out for her.

They never phoned me back

Would they have knowledge about this kind of thing? I'll definitely try them though it seems thryre not open until tomorrow. Thank you.

Go straight to SS and also phone the designated safeguarding lead at her school-they will have to act on your information

You have done the right thing but do you have some support?

I have lots of support from women's aid and my family. Thankfully.

Good for you. You did the right thing. If you’re that worried, flag this with the police so if you call they may prioritise you.

Just spoken to them. They're calling me back tomorrow.