Is there any benefit to sending DC(3) to nursery?

[Temphelp]

My child (summer born) just turned 3 and has a place at the local nursery/primary school. I also have a 2 year old and am pregnant with my (final) child, due in Dec.

Up til now, sending DC3 to nursery seemed like a natural transition. It will only be for 3 hours a day, 5 days a week and it’s not going to cost a penny.

My DH suddenly seems to have reservations about sending DC to nursery “so young” and although he hasn’t been explicitly vocal, I get the feeling that he thinks we should keep DC “at home” until Year 1. DH works full time but I’m a SAHM so handle the kids most of the day, but DH is hands-on when he’s at home so he does pull his weight and takes responsibility for his kids too!

I don’t know... should I send DC to nursery? Should I wait a year or two? Technically, DC only just turned 3 so may be “behind” their classmates (which is fine by me). Is there a benefit to sending DC to nursery or should I just give them similar activities to indulge in at home?

I do already try to give them lots to do at home but there’s only so much I can do in a 2 bed flat with minimum space.

My August born just turned 4yo loved her time at school nursery. Best thing was delegating messy stuff like mud and painting to school! She learned loads too and is much more independent as a result. She's looking forward to.srarting reception tomorrow... must sort stuff!!!

DD started nursery, just two mornings a week, when she was 3. To be honest, she didn't love it at first, though she didn't utterly hate it. We'd picked a small setting (private nursery, not pre-school) which helped, but it took her about six months to find her feet. However it was definitely worthwhile because she learnt to be a bit more independent, interact with other children etc. before she went to school - at school she's in a class of 30, which she'd have found incredibly difficult if she'd never been away from me/dh beforehand. So I think it's worthwhile (maybe less than 5 days to start with) even if your DC doesn't enjoy it to start with.

Free childcare! Why would you not?!

Seriously though I do think it's good for them, they get experience of a new environment, new activities, playing with other children, following simple "rules" etc.

I can see the argument that 3 hours a day for 5 days a week means that you never get a full weekday with them. Perhaps 5 hours a day for 3 days a week would be better. But you don't always get the option.

I was going to suggest that you compromise and start DC1 at nursery in January, but I see that DC3 is due in December, so I would avoid the association of new baby's arrival with starting nursery. I think you should stick to your guns and start DC1 in nursery now - or wait until after Easter 2020.

Will they be starting school in September 2020?

I think nursery is great for them (both of mine started at 9 & 11 months). But if you are going to do it, I would do it longer days, not 5 days a week. Save some days for you to all enjoy together and spare yourself running to and from nursery every day with a new baby. The longer days are easier on them and you, and it's really disruptive to not have days with your baby that you aren't rushing everywhere around nursery runs.

Crikey - never mind the DC what about the benefits for you and your other dc? With a 2 bed flat and a new baby wouldn’t it be good to have some time focusing on them in the morning then altogether in the afternoons.
Are you superwoman?!

Nobody can say if it would benefit him without knowing what you do with him every day.

Do you do plenty of phonics? Numbers and counting? Small world play? Different projects like 'people that help us' every few weeks? Make music? Puzzles and sensory play and messy play? Different arts and crafts? Dies he have plenty of opportunities to take turns with other children, learn to share, make friends etc?
With a two year old and newborn siblings, how much do you think he would miss in those three hours if he wasnt at home with you? How will you prepare him for school if not?

It's totally your decision. I'm not sure if you have to do all the 30 hours either. What is your husband worried about? You could always discuss his or your concerns with the pre school?

I wouldn't worry about him being behind though or base your decision on that. They all start the term after they're 3. They all follow a bespoke plan based on their age range in months, not on their year group. It's not like school where you're ranked and compared and grouped.

Only possible consideration development wise is, is he toilet trained

Yes they should go- you don’t want year 1 to be their first experience of a different environment, care givers, different time structures and mixing with their peers! A good nursery is a joy for kids and most thrive!

My DS has been going to nursery for two full days a week since a month before his second birthday. He likes it there - he gets to play with children his age and they do different activities to what he does at home (as well as some similar). I think it helps reinforce what you teach them, like playing nicely with others and practical things like tidying up after they've eaten, hand washing etc.

@ExplodingCarrots I totally agree,in exactly same set up as you ds is going into year 1 tomorrow and is an only child too.He loved nursery and I'm so glad he went.

All the research suggests nursery is great for over 3s. Regular times are best like all mornings or afternoons. Some find it beneficial to do a whole day for a while before school starts to get used to a whole day but this doesn't suit every child/ family.