To think most parents don't know that rearfacing DCs is safer?

[mumaw]

I'm in Facebook groups that specialise in advice for mainly extended rear facing car seats. It's proven that rear facing your child is much, much safer (in fact 500% safer) than front facing.

But I never see anybody RF'ing their child and don't know anybody that does either.

Is it just a case of parents not knowing that its safer?

@mumaw I have no idea. She just said "I've been meaning to talk to you. My daughter said she's really concerned that the boys aren't FF yet. I just wanted to check whether everything is ok"

@MumApr18 That is such awful advice. They shouldn't be allowed to get away with it.

Eldest was RF until 3.5 years. She was too heavy /long for her seat, so got a HBB and moved her sib from the infant seat to the RF one.

Not being rude but is it any of your business? Every parent is different and there could be various genuine reasons why people dont rear face for very long like car sickness, screaming dangerously and other things like being able to remove arms from harnesses etc. Do they need to be judged? We rear faced til 18 months and then our DD was uncomfortable and had legs that were too long - my opinion of people who rear face til age 3 or 4 is that there is no way it's safe and comfortable for a child to travel long journeys with legs crossed/scrunched up - I know I wouldn't like to travel like that therefore changed to forward facing.

With my first son we FF him at 9 months and I treated like it was some kind of milestone, like he was such a big boy because he now he was allowed to face forwards etc. It’s quite embarrassing really.

It wasn’t until I had my second son that I started looking into car seats and that’s when I started to realise what a risk I had taken with my first son and felt pretty horrified about the ‘quality’ of the seat he’d been in when he was FF (Mothercare own brand).

He’s 5 now so is FF in a high backed booster but once I researched into all the safety testing I went replaced the seat he was using and bought a better branded seat that has undergone extensive testing in collisions.

I have since told my parents, and FIL, that I’m not happy for them to use the booster seat they’ve been using for him and me and DH bought them the same kind of seat we use in our cars.

My second son is now two and he is an expressed rear facing seat which we will probably keep him in until 5 years old. We also only let friends/family transport him in their cars if they use the car seat we have bought.

I think my parents and FIL think I’m being precious about what car seats we use but car safety is so, so, important that it’s not something I compromise on.

With my first son I had absolutely no knowledge about the different qualities of car seats, the ways in which they’re tested and the importance of rear facing etc which is why he was FF from a young age and in what I now know to be a crap seat.

I’m very glad my knowledge around the subject was much better by the time my second son came along.

Mine will be rear facing until she outgrows her size 0 car seat. I want it to be longer but DH disagrees. I’ll put pressure on him again when the time comes.

In my experience, reasons for turning round include

1. Kid hates RF and screams all the time
2. Carsickness
3. FF means you can use an impact shield which is a godsend if your child is Houdini
4. If you have a small 3 door car, it can be really hard to get them in and out of RF seat (We had a Ford KA and had to take DS out through the boot!
5. FF seats are often lighter and easier to transfer if Dc travels in more than one vehicle
6. High cost of extended RF carseats are prohibitive for some families.

I don't think there is a culture of "I know what is best for my child" or people being anti RF. I just think that often these factors outweigh the motiviation to keep RF.

@InterestingView I don't know why you have to get defensive. I didn't say it was any of my business, I was curious as to whether or not it was simply a case of parents not knowing, rather than just being ignorant about it.

There are 5/6/7 year olds that are still rearfacing and comfortable.

@InterestingView and yes it is safe. There are crash test videos to prove it

@MaximusHeadroom I have a 3 door car and will be getting a spin seat to make it easier

How old is your child, OP? When I had a tiny baby I didn't know why anyone forward faced and thought they wouldn't know any difference. Now that I have a 14 month old who spends the whole journey trying to twist to look around to the front I understand why people turn them round! He is still rear facing and I'd like to keep him that way but my target is getting lower and lower - I thought he'd be rearfacing to 4, now I'll be pleased if we get to 18 months...

@NewAccount270219 He is still young yet. But even if I do have problems with him rear facing, there are car seat safety centres that can offer advice and help. I'll be removing the back seat head rest too so he's got a wider view out of the back window

I think most people do know these days definitely moreso than 10 years ago. I hear it talked about a lot more and you do see lots more toddlers and preschoolers continuing to rear face. My nearly 3 year old is in rearfacong whereas with her older brothers that was not really on my radar at this age

ERF is pretty much impossible if you have multiple children under four and tall parents. Even in our large family sedan a RF seat could not be behind the driver as both of us need to drive with the seat fully back. The front passenger could do a hip and legs twisting move to manage with one RF seat across the back. Other two had to be FF.

@NewAccount270219 my son was similar until I put a mirror on the back of the seat he faces! Have you tried this? He can see me in my mirror and I feel more comfortable that can see him too.

Sigh. We know. My very tall 3 year old forward faces because I kept banging her head every time I put her in the car. That particular Facebook page is as sanctimonious as they come. The car seat fanatics make the militant breastfeeders look uncommitted. My favourites.comment was "no ff seat can protect against decapitation." (I bf and ff car seat until LO was 3 btw)..

There is risk, and we all make judgements. The ff risk for older toddlers is over stated.

Mumaw
May be some 5/6/7 year olds are comfortable. Not everyone gets motion sickness! I'm aware that it's safer to sit rear facing on a train, but as an adult, I choose not to as it makes me very nauseous.

Just to give some context here, please do provide some statistics on the number of serious & fatal road traffic accidents there are in the uk involving car seats.

The crazy thing is people who obsess about car seat safety but:

• don't vaccinate
• drive in excess of speed limits
• choose not to breastfeed, or to wean very early
• feed children appalling diets
• keep dog breeds which can be aggressive to young children

There are risks everywhere, these are all things where you can find "evidence" of better/worse outcomes etc or safety issues. We all make our own judgements.

MumApr we have a mirror and it helped a bit, but not a lot - in some ways it makes it worse because I can see just how upset he's getting back there

Ah so, as I thought, you're the new mother of a tiny immobile baby who's come to lecture everyone else on what they're doing wrong...

I can't get too worried about it, unless we're talking babies.

Now the people who put their toddlers in the front seat ... that I do judge. Especially the woman from DD's nursery who audibly commented to her daughter 'look, that poor little girl is still in a baby seat' about DD, while her two-year-old strapped herself in to the front seat. No booster, even!

Still, I suppose we were all crammed seatbeltless into the boot of a Cortina and we all survived, etc. etc.

With my youngest I was fully onboard with RF and bought extended rear facing seat. But he hated being in the car. He cried on every car journey. Every single one. Til he was sick a few times. It had a massive impact on us and I hated being in the car with him and found it dangerous driving.
I lasted til he was 12 months then turned him round. The difference was amazing. Life changing.
I know it is safer but sometimes it's not!!
As an aside he has been in an accident forward facing - bus hit the car and pushed it into a lorry.
He had a small bruise on his head but was otherwise fine.
The paramedics that attended and the police checked the car seats and noted that they were appropriate.

Actually the mirror does help quite a bit if there's someone in the front seat who is willing to play peekaboo with him for the entire journey. It's no use when it's just him and the driver, which is most of the time he's in the car

@NewAccount270219 Not lecturing anybody, just wanted to know the reason why people don't rearface. Like I said, there are solutions to problems with rearfacing

I can’t imagine how I’d get my DCs in a rear facing seat now. They’re 4 and 2 but both really tall for their age (thanks to their giant father). Where do their legs go? We do a lot of long car journeys and they’d be so uncomfortable.

Forward facing would be an absolute last resort for me.