My partner and I split 4 months ago. I found out he had been using drugs, and stealing from me. He cleared out our savings and "borrowed" quite a bit from my personal savings (never paid back) He's also left me in a fair bit of dept. Since the split hes given me bits and bats, nowhere near enough to cover maintenance, let alone what he owes me.
I've just been on the csa calculation site. According to that, he should pay £49 a week in maintenance. He lives with his mum and doesn't pay any rent or anything! He has no other children and no other outgoings. Paying me £49 a week would leave him with £350 a week to himself. How is that fair?
I have 2 DC's my eldest is biologically his, but he gave me the usual guff about how, he'll take her on as his own and always look after her, no matter what.
I work 35 hours a week in shifts. I dont earn a lot little over min wage. I pay £98 a month in childcare (just for our dd) because I also work evenings and weekends I also relied on him and his mum for childcare, which they haven't been doing, so I've had to miss a fair bit of work, which obviously I cant afford.
The last few months have been really difficult, keeping my head above water with bills and his depts, school uniforms, we had to cancel our caravan holiday, I've had to sell my car. My work is about a 15 drive away, but takes 2 buses and nearly and hour plus a good 15 minute walk in total one way. School is a good 15 minute walk. I know it isn't too far, but I only have a very small window between school school run and starting work. God knows how I'm going to work this next week. He doesn't even have any travel expenses. His work, is 5 minute walk, and its 10 minute walk to come see his dd.
I've applied for UC, I'm still waiting for a response but I don't think I'll get anything tbh. Even if I did. Why should the state pay for his dd, when he is more than capable.
Why does csa not take any of this in to account? Childcare, extracurricular activities (shes had to give up swimming and gymnastics) the fact that I have another child, (it would be taken into account if he had another child), how much I earn, how much he pays out, how much I pay out surely that a fairer way. All they asked is how much he earns, does he have any other children, how often does she stay over. Is that really a fair calculation?
AMBU? am I just being a bitter ex?
I was always let to believe that the csa was ridiculously unfair on fathers.