To not want to be ‘that parent’

[Thinkingoutloud13]

So for info I have 3 DS all very different and unique and have there own amazing traits. My middle DS seems to be very bright (7) and after a family bank holiday weekend together at a christening a few people have asked what I am doing to push him and have I looked into the possibility of a scholarship. I know he is bright but don’t want to be that parent that is constantly pushing and trying to force things.
He is the youngest in his year (8 tomorrow) and has taught himself square roots that they don’t cover for another 2 years and the school gave him a year 5 test paper at the end of year 3 to see how he got on and he got 100%.
Last weekend the other children were playing and he decided he wanted to learn algebra which he grasped and is now working through an algebra book for 10-11 year olds I purchased him.
He is good at facts and info such as maths, history, science but not thing like story writing. His teacher mentioned before holidays about pushing him as he had been acting as a peer tutor the last month of term so was to get better plans in place but now people are commenting I am wondering if I should be doing more and pushing for bigger things for him or just leave him to it as he is doing well

What a smart young man!!
I would ask him what he wants to do.
And you won't be "that parent" if he decides he wants to bump up grades etc.Your just a Mama supporting your intelligent kid,no matter what he chooses.💙

He is enjoying learning and self-motivated. I'd buy him those 'work' books if he wants them and let him get on by himself unless he asks for more input.

Carry on as you are and support his passion for learning. If he'd like to take things further then maybe talk to s boil to see what they'd suggest...Congrats, what a smart young man!!

So long as he is happy at school
And you are happy that they are differentiating him, giving him different work and getting him to peer mentor other students, you probably don't need to do anything except to keep encouraging him. The key is to ensure that school are aware and that they extend him and keep him keek and motivated

While I know that his peer tutoring helped other children and he taught others square roots etc I couldn’t help think that’s a month he wasn’t pushed or learning more but thought the lesson in helping others was still a valuable life lesson for him.
He is constantly wanting more from asking me to show him stuff and go over things it’s actually relentless so maybe he does need more. Even to talk to he is like an old head on old shoulders and always has been of that makes sense.
I think maybe a conversation with school is needed to how I can help him as in infant school he didn’t really apply himself then he started juniors and has just excelled and found learning helps him my elder son is 17 and will openly admit he can be out smarted by his brother. It’s that fine line between letting him be a child and pushing him but push to hard and he could lose that passion I suppose

Sounds like you are doing a great job by helping him access his interests. You could definitely talk to the school - that wouldn't make you 'that parent'. I would just ask how they are differentiating to ensure he makes progress.

I wouldn't worry too much at school.
And now the exams are much more about explaining your working, which a child who is naturally mathematical can struggle with (as it's so obvious to them), so peer helping may be beneficial.

I've 3 dc who are mathematical (as me and dh are). My oldest did use to choose to do maths workbooks, the others haven't really. I don't think that makes as much difference as some of the (often silly) conversations we've had at odd moments along the lines of "infinity being a concept".
If he wants maths books, then get them, if he doesn't want them then don't worry.

The best way to stretch is often letting them investigate. Let them spot patterns in say 11 time table (go beyond 10) or work out how they'd count the number of insects in the garden type thing. See if you can find a book with that sort of suggestion.

I would be careful about things your relatives say. He may be absolutely brilliant, but if he starts hearing that he may start reacting accordingly, and that can effect him.

Dh has a relative that is always trying to push how brilliant their dc is. They phone up to tell us that she's just done something they consider amazing. It seems to be a accepted fact among some of his family that everything has to relate back to that this dc is brilliant.

Result of this is that the child in question thinks they are brilliant. They're quite capable (and did last year) on hearing that another relative has A* in further maths A-level and saying "that's nothing, I'll do better". Their identity is totally wrapped up in that they are brilliant.

My dc are way older, and I've helped with maths groups in primary schools of various ages. They haven't yet told me anything that the dc has done that I've thought is anything unusual for the top 10%-25% in a normal class. I've had more than once where they've told me something where I have known that my dc's class did it over a year earlier.

This is going to hit them hard when they finds others that are better because at present they think that the world is in awe.

Exiting op.
I'd go with the flow at this stage keep supplying him with what he wants but I would do research into which schools local to you could support him as he gets older.
You wouldn't want him pushed and into uni by age 10 but equally you wouldn't want him picked on or floundering in crap school

I have an after school church club I leade with year 6's in a grammar school area. The worst thing you can do is let everyone tell him how clever he is constantly. I have had a few that were insufferable (I'm in the top 5% so I am smarter than all of you stuff). O like to remind them that someone who is tangential to the group is absolutely the smartest human I have ever met (multiple PhD's in maths and physics, studies genetics, etc) and he spends his time serving and helping other people and would never once say those things. Teach him to use his cleverness for good but secret, like Superman or Spiderman.