Is he maudlin ?

[Yorkshiregail]

Partner got too close to his
Colleague for my liking. He was too flirty, beaming like a maniac and mentioning her name all Day long.
They were texting on and off all evening long. I put my foot down. Told him
To get rid and stop the disrespect to me .he did. He told her he was stopping contact outside of work . She thought it was a good idea too.
So we went on holiday for two weeks. Both went back to work and saw her for first time since cutting contact, last Monday and he is like depressed at home in the evenings. Hasn’t mentioned her name but thinking this is why. Does he miss her or is he sad to back at work after the holiday. He says work is fine

You need to have a calm quiet talk. No accusations. Tell him you feel as if he is infatuated with her, it seems that way. It may be that she also felt it was getting out of hand. Have you asked him if he is missing her?

I have not Mentioned her name . When I asked him About work his face expression was a mix of awkwardness and deflation .

Ya she agreed and said those words to him..’ it’s getting out of hamd’

Anyone? Am I being paranoid

Yes - he's missing whatever they had. But I don't think you being indignant and giving him a hard time about it is going to help.

It happens. Relationships get stale and old. As pp said, you need to sit down and work out what you can do together, some new joint project to vary the usual routine.

It could have happened to you. Perhaps you've both been taking each other for granted.

No you are not being paranoid. Sorry you are going through this. Sorry to say maybe you only know half of the story. If I was you I wouldn't ask any questions I would watch and listen and try not to get paranoid in the process.

Hormones can make us feel extraordinary and to behave foolishly - if you let them. I think you've been very sensible so far- as long as he doesnt feel too ashamed to hide any simple/work type contact (for fear of your reaction). Only you know how heated it got when you set out expectations.. He maybe misses the highs from the flirting if she is reigning things in. He may have post holiday blues. He may feel low as he's fed up with his routine. The only way to find out is to talk.

I think we're attracted to people on many levels - heart, body, soul, mind. Maybe this was more of a physical/body attraction that made him feel young/giddy/excited/whatever. If he's being respectful of you to stop it then all signs are positive so far. It takes more than a bodily attraction to make a relationship work. That's the bit I'd focus on and then figure out together if anything needs tweaking at home.

You are not being paranoid. Talk to him. It's easy to get involved at work.

Sorry about this OP.

I think it would be a good idea if you just ask him directly. You may not like the answer but you need to know one way or the other.

I think it was a mind / personality attraction. He was always smiling and laughing and texting furiously on his phone each night as I sat across from him on the settee . Now he is sat there motionless and looks miserable . I don’t think his ego can take it speecially when she agrees with him and told him to reel their friendship back in work , too as she said they were excluding the others and it was noticed .I read their texts, don’t shoot me.
He likes to be cherished . He sees her most working days but now I wonder if he expected them to go back to how things were in person once he sorted the phone situation but she’s trie to her word .Or maybe I’m overthinking it .

She sounds sensible it's sometimes sad when you realise your partner in life is a child. Cos he's acting like someone who had their PlayStation taken away. Hope you can movr on