To be upset at this photo send by friend

[Timbuktwo]

We used to be close friends 20 years ago. Now in our early 40s, living in 2 different continents. We occasionally exchange b'day texts and do not have much in common.

I know his family for 20 years. So meet them once a year or so, when I visit my home country. He never married and lives with his parents. He is become more traditional with time and I have become more open minded. He is usually very preachy and has an air of moral superiority.

Last time, we met he lectured me on taking care of my dm and as I tried to respond. (I really try to do whatever I can for dm, I think he secretly judges me for living abroad or travelling occasionally). He cut me off and gave further lecture. He then sent me texts every day about wanting to meet. That his family wanted to meet me too.

I finally texted him that I didn't like him lecturing me and not listening at all. I also mentioned I have been struggling with depression lately. He didn't respond. 6 months later, he started sending me texts again, never mentioned my last text. Now he has been texting at least once a week with random happy Monday or how was your weekend texts.

I don't like last this text as on many occasions he was rude and I let that go. I am a bit upset but I can't completely let go off our friendship as I am close to his family too and his parents are really old.

They have all become a bit judgemental, but I still want to maintain some contact as I know them for a long time and they are very old now. Plus I do not have many friends as I have lived in 4 different countries in past 15 years.
He say he considers me like his younger sister. We are same age. He was always a bit annoying and but had many good qualities. I find him too difficult to be around now.

Any suggestions about how to develop some boundaries with this friend? Thank you.

Mute the conversation and don't open any further messages on whatsapp from him. He'll see they are not being read so might give up. Or better still just block him. I wouldn't give a shit about trying to maintain some sort of relationship with this patronising git.

Just don't text back/reply. It was ok for him to ignore you for 6 months, so do the same to him

Thanks everyone. I have blocked him and will unblock him to give a reply he deserves and then block him again.

@Palaver1 he doesn't keep in contact with my dm. He never visited dm.
It's only me who has been visiting him and his parents as they always lived together.

I feel living with his parents and never having any relationship has made him so judgemental. He used to like a girl in college and weirdly still has her photo on his mobile home screen, she is married and has kids.

He comments on people moving on with new relationships, e.g. candidate has been changed. He never commented on my personal life but I never liked him talking about others in this way.

I think he the reason he lectured me about dm because he lives with his old parents and do a lot for them compared to any other son in his 40s and feel a bit morally superior for living with ageing parents.
Reality is he never moved out, has 3 servants to help with everything in house including shopping. His parents are in good health. His sister lives next door with her family. But he has made a lot of smug comments about him carryout responsibility towards his parents.

@OutwiththeOutCrowd, I am not trying to hold on to any old version of friendship. I am okay to not be friends with him. In fact, each time I met him in last many years, I felt very dissatisfied and disrespected.

He has been rude to me many times in the past and I tried to maintain a distance. I have been made to feel ungrateful for not keeping in touch. One time I accidentally met his family in a local market.
They have helped me in past and his family is genuinely warm towards me. I just don't want to be an ungrateful friend. In my culture people going NC is considered unkind even when you have valid reasons. Sadly, I still care about others opinion of me. I wish I could change it.

Thanks for listening everyone :) I won't let him get away with this time.

How unpleasant of him his a bully.

I hope you make other friends who are worthwhile, BLOCK and ignore.

Let him come begging