To ask how the hell I can get my toddler to sleep?

[Namedilema123]

Posting for traffic. My 14 month old has been fed or rocked to sleep for every nap and sleep shea ever had. And is settled the same way when she wakes at night.

I'm quite clearly crap at getting children to sleep (shes my third failure in the sleep department), so my question is....how would YOU go from feeding and rocking a 14 month old to sleep, to being able to put them in their cot awake, and leave without utter hysteria????

Sorry I have no words of advice butt watching with interest as I have a six month old who is the same... always rocked to sleep and he is getting quite heavy!

You are a bit late to the party! You have to start them off very young putting them down awake, from birth. Changing this habit after so long would take an awful lot of hard work and controlled crying and, if this is what you’ve done so far with 3 kids, I’m guessing it won’t suit you.

If your query is genuine then google controlled crying or similar. It works. But you have to be strong and consistent.

Is there a reason why you can't just let her grow out of it? Try moving on to firm back rubs instead of rocking, then light back rubs, then a light hug.... gradual withdrawal.

What did you do for the other two? Presumably you don't still rock or feed them to sleep?

Do you mean boob?
I BFd DD to sleep up to 18m or so. At 16m I went back to working shifts and the 4-6 wake ups a night killed me.
It was surprisingly easy to go cold turkey - DH or his mum had started doing bedtime with me out of the house and she adapted.
I just said no more boob and cuddled instead.
Going to nursery can help them be tired
She was dreadful at naps - I never mastered naps boob or no boob

I have a 14 month old who is the same. She is a rubbish sleeper. It’s not true what pp said about having to start them young and having to do controlled crying etc. My son used to be fed to sleep at bedtime but could eventually be laid down awake for naps and would go to sleep. He only started doing that of his own accord around 11m/1y. He was then an amazing sleeper until 18 month regression and it went downhill from there. We have had various ups and downs ever since but he is currently at almost 3 sleeping pretty well (touch wood).
My daughter is a different kettle of fish. Slept much better as a newborn/young baby and now is rubbish.
I honestly believe it’s mostly luck of the draw and you get what you’re given. Some babies sleep and others don’t. The smug mother’s with fantastic sleepers didn’t just do everything right from day one anymore than the desperate mother’s whose children would rather party all night than sleep did everything wrong. Hang in there, you’re not alone. This too shall pass.

White noise videos on YouTube is what I used 😂 now she's a bit older she like Disney lullabies. Means I don't have to stay in ruin whilst she gets her self to sleep.

Room not ruin

At 14 months I was in the exact same position as you... one night I put ds in his cot and went to put some washing on/turn the hob off etc. I was downstairs less than 5 minutes. Ds was crying and I came up to get him. By the time I'd got up he was fast asleep.i felt a bit guilty but it worked. At 19 months he has a long nap in his cot between 10 and 12 and goes to sleep for bed ar 6.30. No tears, no drama. He wakes around 6am which is fine as fits with us getting up for work.

I never normally drink coke but it's well used in ultra distances. You shake it to flatten it first believe me 20 miles Into a run on a hot morning, it was divine!

I know my diet is bad and yesterday it was even worse. As I said I don't normally eat that much stodge but I finished Sundays leftovers and we were invited out to tea.

Generally I feel fine and I do feel my clothes are a little looser. I only have one ovary do could be premenopausal or it could be my thyroid (I do go a little dizzy sometimes too)
Or I'm just eating way too much!

Sorry wrong post. No idea how that happened!

At about this age my husband took over bedtimes and read to them until they fell asleep. Worked well, no controlled crying needed.

Then eventually you can leave them awake

At 11 months I did gradual retreat sleep training with my DD; I wasn’t up for leaving her to cry so I combined it a bit with the pick up put down method when she really cried.
It took a couple of weeks of losing my evenings but a year on and she goes to bed after a story and falls asleep by herself. She’s not a perfect sleeper but far far better than before.

This is what I did with my 14months old.

I first night weaned him off milk so would rock, shush etc him back to sleep.
I then made the rule that once they were in the cot they were not allowed out until morning. I would sit next to the cot, sing, rub his back etc. If he got really upset I would pick him
Up until he calmed down and then he would go back in.
First night it took a while and there was a lot of tears. However after that there was less and he no longer needed to be rubbed or sang to. Now he goes in and I just leave him to it but he is 2 now x