What on earth is this mealtime snobbery about?

[Diemme]

At 6.45 this evening, DH and I went to sit outside at front of the house to have a coffee and enjoy the last of the sun - we live in a close with benches outside the houses. Almost immediately our neighbours came back from a dog walk. They chatted for a few minutes and then she said she was going in to make dinner. I mentioned just in small talk that we'd already eaten. And I swear she did a head tilt and tinkly laugh as she said gosh that's early. Then she went inside and her husband arranged his face in a sort of patronising / pitiful expression and asked why we'd eaten so early. It's not just them, ive come across it loads of times. It's as if there's a bizarre sense of superiority to eating at 8 rather than say 6.

As a child in the south east, middle class, we ate supper at 7 ish. It's just what it was called. To me the word has a cosy feel, the stress of school is over, nearly time for bed.
My DP, Yorkshire, working class, ate tea at 6 and supper was what you called a late night snack.
Neither is wrong, neither is better. We really have to learn to accept other people's words are just that and stop getting so emphatic about them!
For what it's worth, I've pretty much adopted the Yorkshire usage as that's where I live now.

I only eat one real meal a day, preferably in the Afternoon, and have a banana or something similarly light later.

I would really struggle to concentrate on so little food.

Eating early means you're common. But as you were sitting in your front garden, you must already know that you are common.

Before DD we would eat as soon as we were in from work at 4.45 - so tea would be done with by 5.30 at the latest. Growing up we would have tea straight after school and then supper was toast or weetabix before bed. Obviously as an adult that's a whole extra meal and not needed and I'd be even more overweight - I'm in bed before I have chance to get hungry again.

Now we tend to wait until DD is in bed at 7 just because it's less stressful and we don't have to rush before the bedtime routine starts at 6.. I'm absolutely STARVING by then though.

I couldn't imagine eating at 8/9 - I aim to be in bed by 9!

Can’t say I have ever noticed it. We eat at 7:30 now but not through choice (DDs bed time coincides). Before having DD and days she stays at GP we eat at 6!

@Camomila
10pm?!
What time do they have lunch?

I don't eat my evening meal til 10. I hate going to bed unless I'm feeling full. I find it weird for adults to eat tea before 7. I wouldn't judge them for it though. Not to their faces anyway...

@notsohippychick

When I babysat last night the 3 year old started crying for her mum. I tried to reassure her that mummy was just having her tea, and then she was coming home. Her big sister translated that for her, telling her I meant 'supper'.

Class thang innit?

Working class: brekkie , dinner and then Tea.

Middle diddle class: Breakfast Lunch and Dinner

Fuck knose what the upper class do, don't know any of 'em;!

Elizadee but then you're eating an extra meal!

Of all the petty snobberies, I think this one is the most pointless one I’ve ever heard of.

Supper is a light bite after the theatre, is it not ?

I would really struggle to concentrate on so little food.

It's quite a substantial meal. It works for me, unless I'm on the first few days of my period, then I'm hungrier and eat more. I don't do it every day, but I often have just one meal. It works for me. I couldn't imagine eating in the morning because it makes me feel nauseated, but others couldn't imagine going without breakfast. It's interesting how different we are.

By we, I mean people generally.

Yes, it is definitely a class thing. Traditionally working class families ate earlier because work was physical, and manual labour also started and finished earlier than professional jobs (still true in some trades).
Where I’m from, Yorkshire, there is also the lunch dinner tea confusion. My middle class family had breakfast, lunch and dinner, DH’s and most of my friends in the village had breakfast, dinner and tea. One or two had breakfast, dinner, tea and then supper - before going to bed!
So if you were asked round for tea, you might not be sure whether you were getting a cup of tea and a biscuit or sitting down to dinner. If asked to come round “for your tea” that always meant dinner though, helpfully.

As a child, nobody explains it all to you.

We ate at around 7.00 or 7.30 as dad had a commute from the nearest city, some friends families ate at 5.30 or 6.00.

It’s a legacy thing and nothing to crow about. They are twats.

Rosere Should we all just agree to call the evening mean 'dinner'?

No dinner is at 12pm hence ' dinner ladies ' at school.

Last meal is tea. We also have it at around 5 as not that good to eat late.

Wow, those of you who eat a late evening meal, how do your kids cope with waiting? Presuming you have young children, of course.
Fwiw, I am a foreigner who learnt English abroad before moving here, and we were definitely taught that 'supper' is what you call a lighter meal taken in your own home after 7pm ('dinner' was supposedly the regular evening meal taken between 5-7, or something you go out to of an evening), so I have definitely used the term 'supper' to describe evening munchies cringe I don't have a posh bone in my body.

I try to eat dinner early because I don’t want to get fat 🤷‍♀️

I get indigestion in bed if I eat after about 8. If we eat later than that I usually have to stay up till about 1am

When I moved to the UK I found that eating dinner at 6pm felt really late. We always had dinner at around 5pm when I lived with my parents and even when I lived on my own. Now I try to eat at 6 but I'm rarely at home by 6, and our toddler plays up at his bedtime so we generally don't get to eat until 8pm at the moment which is practically my bedtime!

I thought supper was a post-dinner snack before bed? I have that too. I like my evening eats.

I call it dinner but still eat it early as soon as I get back from work to increase my night fasting time.
I think it's very unhealthy to eat late and then sleep on a full stomach.

@notsohippychick when I was a kid, supper meant a microwaved sarnie with a glass of pink milk. That's all I can think of when someone says it now.

No dinner is at 12pm hence ' dinner ladies ' at school.

Nah, 12pm is lunch.

It’s when they call it “Supper” that really winds me up. It’s Tea, or Dinner. Saying you eat “Supper” means you have ideas of grandeur! Lol!

Yes, this drives me around the twist! It’s one of those words that I really don’t - particularly when it’s used for the main evening meal as opposed to a slice of toast at 10pm. Also trying to pronounce things “properly”, eg “do you want to come round for a bit of supper? I was thinking of doing a pa-YEAH-ya”