...to want DP to agree to trade in our motorhome?

[Zoidbergonthehalfshell]

And if I'm not, please, oh wise women of Mumsnet, give me some ideas of ways to reason with him!
Our van is old. Not classic old, just old. It was the best we could afford when we bought it, nearly 10 years ago, and we have had some wonderful holidays in it. But now it's becoming increasingly knackered and unreliable; we like staying on the Scottish islands, but this year we had to come back to the mainland early because it was playing up and DH didn't want to be stuck on the island in case it broke down completely (it did - we had to be bought home on the back of a recovery truck).

We've just had the brakes play up on the way home from a few days break. His reaction was to pat the steering wheel saying, "Aww, you nearly made it home without going wrong this time, didn't you?"

I know he loves the van. I do too. I'll be sad to part with it too. But it seems a bit daft to hang onto it when we can't go to the places we want to in case it breaks down!

A relative (who's worried about the safety aspect) has offered to loan us the money to upgrade, and I've even suggested we ask if we could use the loan to get our own van fixed properly once and for all, but he just mumbles and changes the subject.

I am sympathetic, but aibu? Help!

Nothing worse than an unreliable vehicle. If it breaks down in the wrong spot it could kill you. He's being unreasonable.

You need to refuse to go anywhere in it. Otherwise he will think you don’t really mean it.

Wait until he's planning the next trip and then strike while the iron is heating up.

And, as a PP said, refuse to go anywhere.

Refuse to go.

I don't have a motorhome but until recently I had an elderly car (16 years old!) I liked it. It had started to have a few things go wrong and was costing a bit to keep on the road so I knew I would have to do something eventually but I kept putting it off.

Then it broke down in spectacular fashion (wishbone snapped and wheel came off.) Luckily I was not driving fast at the time and was on a wide road where I wasn't obstructing anyone. If it had happened when I was driving fast or in the middle of a junction or something it could have been awful.

It has now gone to the great scrap yard in the sky and I will certainly not hang on to a car as long as that again

Thankyou all for your replies - I'm very grateful. I was expecting at least one or two people to tell me I'm being cruel wanting him to give up his pride and joy, but you're right, it is becoming dangerous.

I've taken on board the advice about refusing to go anywhere in it again, or saying I will follow in the car (that will go down like a lead duck because it will cost money!! )

@5foot5, your reply was a bit of a wake up call. If something like that was to happen pootling around one of the islands it would be bloody inconvenient - if it was to happen at 70 - 80 mph on the motorway on the way there, well...

Food for thought indeed. Thankyou again.

Oh god trade it in, he will love the new more after your first trip and everything runs like clockwork

YANBU, I'd do some research and shortlist a few potential replacements within your budget, see if they have any added features/gadgets that might tempt him.

A couple of years ago the suspension collapsed on a 10-year-old car that I loved. Fixed that at considerable expense, then within a couple of weeks the engine management light came on and I booked it in to a garage to get it diagnosed. Before it even got there the gearbox decided that it didn't like using 5th or 6th any more.

There comes a time when you just have to cut your losses. And it turns out that WeBuyAnyCar really do buy any car.

Can you get it permanently sited somewhere?

We have broken down on a Scottish island with a transit van. Total faff because there was no commercial vehicle garage on the island.

I’d be tempted to take him shopping to have a look at what newer vans offer..... just window shopping.

How many of us go window shopping and end up seduced by the shiny lovely things......