To ask you for your drink-driving experiences

[smokeytoby]

Has anyone here been impacted by drink driving?

Lost a loved one to a drink driver? Had someone close to them drive whilst under the influence?

Without going into detail, I need some real accounts of how drink driving impacts lives to show to someone close to myself.

Thank you in advance.

When you say drink and drive, do you mean over-the-limit drinking? Or drinking anything at all, eg, 125ml of 12% wine at 8pm and driving at 11.30pm?

I used to live adjacent to a social club. You got to recognise the cars that parked right outside and nipped in for a 'quick half' after work. They'd still be there at closing and just hop in the car and drive home, judging by the noise they made when leaving i'm certain they had more than a half.

We did report it to the police, several times and even provided them with the license plate numbers. Despite reassurances from them they would follow up on it I don't think they did as the patrons just carried on as they always did.

Drink driving is the epitome of selfishness.

but someone I know considered driving after a drink, they didn't but I need to show them how serious their actions could have been if they chose to do so.

If they're old enough to drive they're old enough to know the consequences. If they're selfish enough to drive when over the limit they'll do it regardless.

Colleague of DHs. Luckily not in an accident, but was caught. Found guilty and got a driving ban.
He was a Warrant Officer in the Army. His Criminal Record then meant he couldn't do his specific job. This meant demotion to a job he could do. This meant his whole family had to move. His wife needed to find a new job, kids new schools. Pay cut. Otherwise promising career ruined.

Wasn't even that much over the limit, but shows how just a little can really change your life.

A guy I was at school with is in a long term hospital/home due to wrapping his car around a tree at 19 several times over the limit - that was 28 years ago. I've not visited him In person but a mutual friend has and she said it is just like in the drink drive advert where the mum is spooning food into the sons mouth, so sad. In this case he was the only person affected but too often drink drivers destroy other people's lives - this week a chap near me was convicted of hit and run whilst twice the legal limit, killing an 18 year old student outside the halls, he's ruined the lives of that family and traumatised the 6 young witnesses for life, 2 had to drop out of university due to ptsd

A distant family member (young adult) was killed by a drunk driver. They were an innocent pedestrian who was hit when the driver lost control on a bend, the car veered and went on to the pavement.

The PP who said it's like a bomb going off in the family is so right. The parents marriage collapsed under the strain of their loss. The Dad went off the rails completely, walked out, left his job, huge mental breakdown. No idea where he has ended up, cut himself off from everyone.
The Mum struggled on for a bit but became severely depressed. Their younger children had to be cared for by other relatives for quite a long time and have issues from this, didn't do as well at school as expected, one now has MH issues including severe agoraphobia/anxiety and disordered eating meaning they have no job or social life.

It's a hideous thing to see what happens to a family devastated by one person's complete and utter selfishness. It's so avoidable, that's the crux, just don't bloody do it and don't wreck innocent lives!!

A friend of my mums was hit by a drunk driver when he was 19 (he's in his 60s now) he was left with serious injuries meaning he can't walk unaided and has lost his sense of taste and smell. I went nc with someone because she nonchalantly told me that she had driven her grandchildren home after spending all drinking double vodka and red bulls. Because she "couldn't be bothered to walk". It's abhorrent behaviour.

My friend's late husband was hit by a car driven by one of a group of pissed up lads. The car mounted the pavement and hit him as he was walking home from a late shift at the hospital where he was a porter. He sustained quite a significant brain injury and he was blind as a result. He also had acquired epilepsy and died a few years later from a heart attack while he was having a seizure.

The police couldn't prosecute because the men in the car all claimed that they weren't driving and that they couldn't remember who was. This made the insurance position hideously complex and she got compensation from the Motor Insurer's Bureau as a result, but it took years and it was far less than the insurers would have had to pay.

DD was a passenger in a car with a drunk driver ten years ago. He forced her in the car, she did not get in voluntarily.

Broke her back, Pelvis and neck, lost her spleen, badly damaged her lungs. I spent three weeks not knowing if she would survive. She apparently made a “full” recovery. This translates as unable to have children as her pelvis would cause her too much pain, the beginnings of arthritis at 35, life long issues with her immune system due to no spleen, and near constant pain in her back.

He bruised his shoulder! and served 9 months of a two year jail sentence.

My sibling drove away from a party and ended up driving head on to a taxi while going round a bend (she drifted). Car was a write off and she lost her licence for 18 months (reduced to 12 after attending a course).

As a result of this, her University course was put on hold as they reassessed her suitability (Social Work). As she had no transport, she had to defer for a year as she couldn't get to placements. A knock-on effect is that while they didn't kick her off the course, they then found it difficult to match her with a placement due to her conviction as places doubted her integrity.

There was also an investigation with her work (works with children) as they also questioned her suitability and judgement.

To date, she has not returned to university to complete her final year and never received her degree.

Step father - hit a trailer reversing out of a drive. Wrote off his car. Police found a half drunk bottle of gin on his passenger seat. Lost his licence, lost his job, triggering a 9 months spiral of alcoholic descent, ending with throwing up blood in A&E, and very ££££ rehab. Relationship with DM irrevocably broken down.

University friend killed by drunk driver in her way back to uni for our final year. She’d been on a field trip with us the previous week, but had gone home for a few days to see her boyfriend. He walked away without a scratch but many demons.

Colleague - permanently disabled by a drunk driver, who came off the road and ran colleague over. He is “fortunate” that he can still walk, albeit with a stick, and drive a Motability car, but has had to change from a very physical job to a desk based job, which is different to what he really trained for.

Different colleague in a different job. Early 20s, very into the club scene. Her best friend killed by a drunk driver, her boyfriend lost his licence through drunk driving and she had limited movement in one hand from cutting nerves after falling down stairs when drunk and smashing into a stack of bottles and glasses.

Me personally, nothing. But I can’t forgive my stepfather for leaving my twice-widowed mum for Jack Daniels after 15 years sobriety.

Whoever asked journalist?

In this instance, so what if it was.

(I am not accusing OP of that by the way.)

It would make a more worthy news article than whether a frock is ugly or not as it might make someone think twice about driving under the influence and save a life.

18 year old friend killed by travelling in a car with a drunk driver. He was flung out of the back windscreen and died when his family switched off his life support once his sister got back from Australia. Such a waste.

Just thought of a 3rd person banned, he’d been doing it for years and my impression is that most of them have done it loads of times before they are caught. I also refused to get in a car with a friend many many years ago who was wasted and insisted on driving. IMO it’s definitely coupled with alcohol problems in general and they always seem to be a bit of a dickhead.

A relative suffered life changing injuries - became paraplegic and had a massive stroke, losing her ability to speak - as a result of a drink driver ramming her through a window.

FIL put his car on its roof on the dual carriageway. Thought he was ok to drive but still over from the night before. Lost license and Job.

BIL lost license for doing similar after not realising he was still over the limit next morning.

SIL's 17yo brother drove his car into a wall and died.

How much had they drank when they were considering driving OP?

A very close member of my family was drunk behind the wheel and she was killed. I really wish the police had spotted her driving sooner! Luckily no-one else was involved or goodness knows what might have happened. I was very close to getting in the car as well.

My dad wrote off his brand new £120k car whilst shit faced and lost his licence, no insurance for the car and had to pay a charge as he crashed into a railway bridge. Not his finest hour. He rang me from cells as he was scared to call his wife (I was an adult and told him to call his wife. He did and she left him there to sober up good on her).

My friend hit a family the day after the night before, he killed all but the mother who had life changing injuries. He lost his reputation and most of his career (time limited career), went to jail, has to live with the fact he killed a father and two under 10s. He did very hard time as he was a minor celeb at the time in the area he was convicted and was not popular in prison.

Warning, graphic. Close relative was first on the scene of a car on fire, crashed on a bend. Later revealed driver and passenger had been drink driving. He went to pull the driver out of the burning vehicle, only to pull out just his upper body. It was severed from his legs. Passenger burned to death from what I remember. Two families lives ruined, not to mention their friends and girlfriends. It affected my relative deeply.

They had not drank too much to be absolutely hammered, from what I can figure it was around 3 or 4 pints, but more than enough to be well over the limit and to impair their reaction time and driving ability significantly. I have shown the person in question these responses which had them in tears, the message hit hard. Thank you all, and my sincere and absolute condolences to those who have lost loved ones due to drink-drivers.

I hope we have helped prevent one more tragic statistic OP.

Two friends from college dead on the way to celebrate the second's 17th birthday. The driver had been drinking to celebrate his 18th the day before. 17 year old was found half inside and half outside the vehicle - over a distance of roughly twice his height.

Best friend from year 7 killed whilst I was in hospital giving birth by a motorcyclist trying to avoid a drunk driver at 11am on a Friday morning on the wrong side of the road.

Ex threw a temper tantrum and threw the car around to scare me because I'd pointed out he was doing 60 in a 20 zone, missed a 84 year old man crossing the road by centimetres, old man nearly bled out in front of me where he cut his wrist open. Found out ex was drunk when I told the police I wasn't a pedestrian, the driver had left and they went searching for him. Dumped him - so he lost his licence, paid a hefty fine, lost his meal ticket and as he'd apparently just given up his tenancy in the hope I'd let him move in, ended up homeless.

Same person claimed previously when drunk that he'd helped his brother in law to dump and burn a car when BIL had driven into a 16 year old on a crossing after his usual 5 cans of Stella by 3pm. 16 year old never walked again. (no idea whether my call to the police was taken seriously or not).

DP - little sister of someone in his class killed when her brother rolled their mum's car down a valley into a river when drunk. Killed himself six months later.

His father rolled DP's car when insisting he drove back from a meal and hit a flock of sheep on the Moors whilst looking out of the side window, waffling about stars. DP had inherited the car a week before from his grandfather. Lost his job because he couldn't drive to work.

Your 'friend' is a fucking dick for even thinking about it. Don't bother showing them these, as they won't care. Just call 999 the next time they have been in the same room as alcohol and are driving back. Even if they aren't drinking, getting them stopped and breathalysed frequently enough will either catch them or they'll decide its not worth the risk.

My stepbrother. Stepped out of a pub on NYE saw a car screeching toward a lady crossing a road, and in true heroic style shoved her out of the way. She broke her arm as she fell. He never came home - although his organs did go on to save six lives. There is never any excuse in my mind for someone to get behind a wheel even if they've had one drink. I know many don't agree with me but that's my personal belief.

DHs dad was killed in a car accident by a drunk driver who pulled out of a junction without looking, when DH was still a kid