To be annoyed about this?

[Burbarann]

Chatting to someone on OD for about ten days, they live in a city around 2 hours away but say they come to my area frequently. Been chatting a lot most days and they mentioned last week they were trying to come down this week but would confirm days when they knew. All good, chatted a lot of the weekend etc, then radio silence all day yesterday - I restarted the conversation late at night, they replied and chatted a bit then randomly went offline. Nothing since. Aibu to write off and move on?

Yep. Just move on.

(Sorry, been there).

If they are interested, they will restart the chat.

So it’s a no?

Don’t get why he seemed so keen and then suddenly gone

Just take the breezy approach. Let him strike the next conversation up.

Feeling really low about it

@Burbarann, sorry if this seems harsh but you need to question why you feel low. You've never met this person, you don't know him/her and you've been chatting ten days online. This is a stranger.
My advice is to not get so emotionally-invested in online conversations.
Don't waste your time and emotional energy on persons you don't know.

You’re right - just don’t understand why he’s gone so off the radar so randomly

He's probably met someone else nearer, OP.

Just move on. It's not as though you met him and had a relationship.

There will be others. I hope you meet someone soon.

Met someone nearer between Sunday night and yesterday? 😂 I will move on though!

Are you seriously low because someone had a day offline? And then when you initiated conversation yourself it was late at night and you cant work out that he probably fell asleep. Its been 10 days and your this possessive?? Back away. For for you. For his sake.

It is not you , it is the other person .

Give them three days to strike up a conversation, then move on. They may be busy or talking to others.

I listen to a podcast called Why Won’t You Date Me (which is hilarious) and the last guy she interviewed said that he will start chatting to women online when he feels sick (as he feels lonely that he doesn’t have a partner to look after him). As soon as he feels better, he ghosts them.

Not saying this is the case, but just saying that there are a lot of wankers out there, so move on. And good luck OP

But also, it’s not necessarily over. He may be busy. Leave it for a bit and see what happens

I think some people just like chatting to people, they never have any intention of meeting.

For some I guess it’s an ego boost, just to know they could if they wanted

Just meet someone else

Married or in a relationship? Move on.

Oh, there could be loads of reasons. He might just be someone who gets a thrill out of chatting to women and seeing if they like him, but never has any intention of meeting them. He might be someone who likes the idea of dating but then chickens out and has second thoughts when it comes to actually meeting someone. He might have met someone else nearer to where he lives, or been on another date that went really well, or he's talking to several women and feels he has more of a rapport with a different one. He might have got back with an ex. He might have been put off by some minor thing you said. He might be a married man who's realised he just can't go through with cheating. I could go on.

Either way ... it's not that big a deal, I'm afraid. You chatted online for a few days. That's it. He's a complete stranger, and you've invested way too much in a few days of online chat. You weren't in a relationship with him, and you really need to move on. This sort of thing does happen quite a lot in online dating - I don't think you should be getting this upset about something so casual.

Also, I would add that people do have lives beyond dating. Not everyone is available online to chat every single day. If I was chatting to someone who worried about me being offline for 24 hours I'd run a mile - it's a bit clingy and intense.