To think a school can change the culture when it comes to anti-redhead bullying?

[Absofruitly]

My son has recently started secondary school (we're in Scotland) and in the small number of days he has been at the school so far, he has on numerous occasions been threatened by other children that it is 'kick a ginger day' (he has red hair) and has also been kicked once by an older child (so much for looking out for the young new starts). This all came out after school today. He has been teased about his hair colour his whole life by ignorant little so-and-sos (while being roundly admired by all the little old ladies), but it seems to have stepped up a notch now he is at secondary school.
Is anti-redhead bullying taken seriously by schools, I wonder? I have told him to speak to his registration teacher (key adult) in the morning, and I will also contact the school separately, but I wonder what can really be done. Anti 'ginger' sentiment seems so ingrained in certain quarters here, and this is a country with the highest number of redheads in the world!
What can I really expect the school to do to deal with this kind of nastiness? I really don't want my son to feel negatively towards his hair. I think it's beautiful!

Get a copy of the school's bullying and equality policies, and have a meeting where you go through exactly how they are going to implement them.

It’s so tiresome. I consider myself lucky as I only ever had very minor comments through school (my hair isn’t even that red and has almost faded now) but I’ve still been shouted at in a shop once as a teen ‘stupid ginger’ and harassed whilst working as a waitress with the whole ginger pubes thing. This was as an adult. I think as a ginge you have to develop a thick skin! It’s wrong but unfortunately it’s the one physical characteristic that it’s still seen as totally ‘fair game’ to bully and harass over. Speak to the school. I would hope it’s a phase and he can’t be the only redhead in the school, there may be others who are suffering this bullying too. On the plus side I think red hair in adults is seen as a little more desirable now, for men too.

Of course it’s nothing like the deeply ingrained racism in our society, I don’t think anyone on this thread has suggested this? I have read though that several possible origins for the distaste for redheads comes from anti Irish/Scots and even Jewish sentiment, so I don’t think it’s just a case of ‘kids pick on things that are different’. Sadly it goes on into adulthood too as it’s very ingrained over much of Europe that’s red hair is undesirable.

I was horrendously bullied through primary and high school for having red hair and glasses, I'd cry to my mum about colouring my hair to 'fit in' and as soon as I was at school I'd take my glasses off.... Now it seems a fashion statement to most of those that teased me for it and I have crappy eyesight.

The school should definitely do something about the bullying, bless your lad.

I was bullied in year 5 (damaged sight in one eye as a result of it) because I was a red head with a Welsh accent. It is so depressing that it still continues. But even Prince William is not beyond making ginger jokes on camera - OK in the context of a close filial relationship and in response to being called baldy by Harry - but that does rather seem to endorse the fact that it is still socially acceptable to mock a redhead.

Dd just finished year 7 at our local comp (just outside greater London) she has red, very curly hair (a lot of the other girls have long straight brown or blonde hair) she never had problems at primary and was happy. I worried about her starting secondary even though older dd said kids with red hair didn't get picked on. It's gone well. She's happy and gets on well with her class. She sometimes makes jokes herself but doesn't get mean comments. I must admit I assumed picking on red heads must have gone out of fashion, but perhaps it's just that her school culture is good. She said a girl in another class with red hair is one of the popular group. I know they come down hard on bullying.

In the context of the school bully shouting across the playground or stealing your stuff in the hall it absolutely is the same as having that done to you because you have dark skin, or any other obvious noticeable difference. The bully does not care for the relative history of racism or anything else, they are just picking on you because you are noticeably different and it is an easy target for them. I'm a redhead and I still remember now the kids who bullied me getting nothing more than the odd detention, but exclusions were given out for the same treatment but to the children who were black. I don't think having your bag taken and thrown around the lunch hall is less humiliating because you are 'only' a ginger, and that has stuck with me for life.

It's not taken seriously in my opinion by schools. Or anyone. People tend to dismiss it with "but your hair is lovely" but that doesn't stop the taunting/ notes/ memes/ violence. It just invalidates the child's feelings

Whilst bullying is prevalent in society as a whole, schools will never be able to stamp it out. They can educate and a good school will deal severely with any bully. My DD was bullied over the colour of her hair and she is not a redhead. Having worked for a long time in schools, I know wife someone wants to bully, they will find even a tiny aspect of appearance and character to use as a weapon.

Hope the school is supportive of your DS.

I wonder if all the redheaded children get this horrible bullying and some are just thick-skinned enough to not let it bother them? My son is a sensitive soul and rightly sees and feels the injustice

No, I don't think it's in any way your son's fault or that it's him that needs to change. I'm very sure my dd would be upset if people were being horrible to her. I think it's the school culture. I hadn't read the whole thread when I posted but I noticed that OtraCosaMariposa posted a very similar post to mine.

We both wrote that our children didn't have problems at school and it wasn't a thing and then both wrote that the school comes down very hard on bullying. So i think it's that which makes kids not bother to pick on red heads. As they know they won't get away with it. It isn't that dd goes to a "naice" school either. Just the local comp with a full range of kids.

DS has only ever had positive comments about his hair. When he was tiny and I was pushing him round supermarkets in the trolley we'd get old ladies stopping all the time to comment on his red hair and massive blue eyes. Children have never commented in a positive or negative way, as I said upthread he's one of many with red hair in the school and it's not really a difference.

In Portugal as a baby he was like a movie star, all the locals wanted a look at this baby with the red hair, super pale skin and bright blue eyes.

Agree that it does very much boil down to prejudice against Irish or Scots genes. DH and I both have lots of Irish and Scottish ancestry and you need both parents to be carriers of the red gene to have a red haired child.

Also, the vile, vile Katie Hopkins tweeted that ginger babies are "harder to love" and that there's nothing worse than a ginger baby.

But that's OK because it's not illegal to be vile.

Agree that it does very much boil down to prejudice against Irish or Scots genes
So perhaps anti Irish sentiment in the OP's son's case then as he's in Edinburgh

Katie Hopkins is vile and really ugly inside and out. Wonder if that’s harder to love?

DS has only ever had positive comments about his hair. When he was tiny and I was pushing him round supermarkets in the trolley we'd get old ladies stopping all the time to comment on his red hair and massive blue eyes. Children have never commented in a positive or negative way, as I said upthread he's one of many with red hair in the school and it's not really a difference
Yes, we've had the same experience, although dd's the only one in her class with red hair

Its a culture of bullying that needs to be addressed by the school prompto. Demand that they have a strategy in place with timelines, demand to see their complaints and escalation procedure and their plans to deal with the bullies. Come down strong, get it logged, and demand to speak to the head. In my experience, they will take it seriously if you complain hard.

I have a redhead who also has aspergers. He didn't stand a chance at secondary school and had to leave due to bullying. He used to be called "a fucking ginger faggot" and wasn't rough enough to stand up for himself so we pulled him out when he started talking about 'not wanting to be here anymore' ifyswim.

People are evil, they really are.

As much as I love my DC’s red hair, I won’t lie, this is something that makes me worry. DD’s hair is strawberry blonde but DS is much more auburn (and curly, and bloody gorgeous) but shit like this make me white hot with rage. I’m hoping that there will be a mix of different appearances and ethnic backgrounds in DS’s class when he starts school, and that his hair won’t be commented on, but who knows. Some kids will always find something to bully others about I suppose.

I don't understand why this seems to be so prevalent in some areas and not others. I've been ginger (that's the word I prefer) for 53 years and nobody has ever said anything uncomplimentary about it. Like @Rubyupbeat I hate it most when people say I'm not ginger - I can assure you I most definitely am, and it is something I like about myself and you don't get to take that way from me! I do know of one ginger boy who was sometimes teased at primary school but it was obvious this was mainly because he wasn't liked anyway (he was arrogant and bossy) and he reacted in an entertaining way when people mentioned his hair colour. But if he hadn't been ginger, they would have found something else to criticise about him, because he was just so annoying.

(I am not suggesting that the OP's son is annoying. I'm just puzzled that there are these pockets of anti-gingerism in places and in other places it doesn't seem to be so much of a problem. Does it have something to do with sectarianism in Scotland, I wonder?)

How awful. I love red hair. I've been a teacher for over 20 years and I've never been aware of any anti-red hair bullying in any of the schools I've worked in. I wonder if it's a regional thing. Anyway, definitely push the school to deal with it harshly.

@Absofruitly I sadly don’t think it’s his hair colour that will be the issue- kids can be cruel and if they want to pick on someone, will find an excuse, hair/skin colour, weight, height, clothes, glasses etc are all easy options. The only kids that escape bullying completely are the very lucky ones. It would be better to focus on who is doing the bullying if it is repetitive and get the school to look into that and address their culture in general. Good luck (and I’m a ginger by choice!)

I suppose it doesn’t matter what type of bullying it is. Bullying in any form is horrible and the school should take it very seriously. Talk to his Form tutor and head of year. They should deal with it, try and get as much information from your son as possible so it will be for the teachers to identify who is doing it. So sorry your son is going through this, really hope the school is hot on this and it gets better for him.