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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

AIBU to ask for the collective advice from MN and not LTB

22 replies

blowjobsbitontheside · 20/08/2019 16:24

Ok I know it’s not going to last : after all he doesn’t have a good history on that score but still , I am quite enjoying some of the perks of my new role as his other half , so I am not going to LTB (yet) and just want some survival tips for now.
His new job came with a tied house, well more of a small flat really but we do get to use the back garden. Whilst it’s small I have found a little niche for my laptop all for me. He is so huge and pretty thoughtless , I need some space where it will be safe.

What’s wrong with him? well where do I start?

Everything is always about him and him first. He doesn’t really care about anything else. I am tolerated probably because I look good on his arm and sometimes he needs a partner if only to pair up with someone else at posh dinners.

He has a temper of course but if I just say “yes if you say so” and stoke his messy hair it seems to calm him most of the time
Trouble is , he’s not that bright and sometimes discussions and arguments just go round in circles. It’s like dealing with a toddler. Take last night. We had ice cream after dinner. It melted before he had finished it. “I don’t want this melting ice cream!” he screams, “ I want non melting ice cream!”
Is there such a thing? I asked.
“Stop being so negative! “ was his reply , slamming his hand down on the sofa. The sofa is now covered with melted cream , still it matched the old wine stains , I suppose.

So lovely people of MN I would love some advice from you lot on how to survive, how to endure him whilst enjoying my new perks.

OP posts:
Rubbinghimsweetly2 · 20/08/2019 16:26

Are you batshit dear.

sweetsaltypopcorn · 20/08/2019 16:30

WTAF.

MildDrPepperAddiction · 20/08/2019 16:31

Is this real?

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 20/08/2019 16:33

Yes but you have a great new address and someone to open the door for you.

writersbeenblocked · 20/08/2019 16:33

Reported.

Gracie300 · 20/08/2019 16:33

😂

blowjobsbitontheside · 20/08/2019 16:34

Chaz you are right , the address is one of the best perks. Thinking of getting new letter headed paper just so I can use it.

OP posts:
ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 20/08/2019 16:35

Have you made friends with Larry?

blowjobsbitontheside · 20/08/2019 16:37

I think Larry preferred the previous tenants.

OP posts:
Beebeezed · 20/08/2019 16:41
Hmm
Namenic · 20/08/2019 16:42

Haha! Well enjoy the perks! Hope his job isn’t affected by the Brexit mess.

FatherBuzzCagney · 20/08/2019 16:42

Is this real?

Obviously not.

Owlypants · 20/08/2019 16:52

Maybe keep him happy and distracted with a weekly game of whiff whaff

LilyMumsnet · 20/08/2019 20:33

Hi folks,

We're reinstating this thread now - we missed the joke... Blush

FinnBalorsAbs · 20/08/2019 20:36

You’re getting to meet the Queen. Maybe ask her for how she copes with Phil’s verbal gaffes?

blowjobsbitontheside · 20/08/2019 20:56

Lily at MN HQ , I am surprised that you didn’t spot my new name!

OP posts:
EggysMom · 20/08/2019 21:01

Think of the perks. Unlimited media exposure. Guaranteed at least a million for your stories after you split up. Probably get a television gig, everybody else seems to.

donquixotedelamancha · 20/08/2019 21:04

The sofa is now covered with melted cream

Nonsense, there are no stains, that's just civil service propoganda. Project fear.

“I don’t want this melting ice cream!” he screams, “ I want non melting ice cream!”
Is there such a thing? I asked.

I believe in this country. I'm patriotic enough to think that ice cream will never melt in the UK.

Anyway, we endured the blitz, so what's a little melted ice cream? Which won't happen anyway.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 20/08/2019 21:16

Didn’t you have a backstop pudding at the ready?

CmdrCressidaDuck · 20/08/2019 21:19

Oh dear. All the best m'dear, and the next time a bottle of wine gets knocked over, may I suggest you "accidentally" use that hideous flannel shirt to mop it up. Grin

2beesornot2beesthatisthehoney · 21/08/2019 13:24

He has a stunning unicorn at the end of the bed. I am pretty sure I saw him humping it when I was asleep!

I am the OP by the way

CmdrCressidaDuck · 21/08/2019 16:36

Saw the papers today OP. Looked like a bit of a complication to your holiday? :)

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