Heart valve recovery

[Aybecee]

Apologies in advance for posting here but I need traffic and I’m so worried.

My nearly 80 year old grandmother had a heart replacement on Friday. She is indomitable in spirit and brings us more joy than I could ever put into words. I’ve just had a baby and she is everything to her. I desperately want her to be here for longer to see her grow up for as long as we’re lucky to have her.

She doesn’t have the best mobility (in the sense that she’s generally not super steady on her feet but still drives and is independent, but we wouldn’t trust her mobility if that makes sense),

The op went “to plan” but she’s so unwell, not eating much and looks ill (to be expected, I know). She suddenly fainted today which was so distressing and it was due to her heart missing a beat and the doctor said that she’s had a murmur the last few days.

My mum will be caring for her at her house afterwards and I will help as I’m still on mat leave. We’re well aware that the recovery is long but I’d really appreciate any insight anyone has into the reality - how did a loved one cope after this surgery, were there setbacks, etc. Just whatbto expect really. She doesn’t seem well enough to us to be able to come out of hospital this week. I’m quite terrified that this will happen when she’s home (ie fainting).

Please don’t hold back. For now, I just can’t imagine how she can recover from such an ordeal.

Thank you for reading

When I say she’s strong in spirit I mean that she seems a lot younger. She’s utterly abreast on world affairs and has the same outlook as a 30 year old. She’s kind, compassionate and great fun. Better company than a lot of people my own age. This makes me worry that medical staff will think she’s more capable. She’s very much the type to say she’s fine when she’s not.

Sorry, no advice but these things do take time. Try and focus on yourself and the baby for now. She's in the best place to receive the care she needs.
My Dad had a major OP recently (age 70) and had bad and good days in recovery, lost a lot if weight but now is doing really well 3 months later.

It is a long recovery. MIL had it last October. She was very unwell for quite a while. She developed post operative delerium and was not nice to people for a while. Thankfully it passed and I don’t think she remembers that.

She had no energy for months. Was breathless and in pain. Was very down also. Mainly frustration at not being able to do much and frustration at people thinking she should be doing more!

She gradually improved and is pretty much back to normal although still gets v tired. She has some other issues too though which didn’t help.

Jamhandprints- thank you. You’re right and your comments give me perspective. Glad to hear your dad is doing well.

Peridot - thank you. That’s useful to hear. I think it was a shock to see her so unwell despite expecting her to feel terrible. How did she manage when she got home? Was she in hospital for roughly a week or longer? And importantly, if she could go back would she still have had the surgery?

She was in hospital for about ten days I think. And then went into a nursing home for ten days - self funded. It was a bit of a mess as she seemed to think she would be sent to a respite home but that didn’t happen. We still aren’t sure who got it wrong and it all happened when she had the delerium and was generally angry at everything and everyone.

When she went home she had carers come in during the day to help her get washed etc.

I’m not sure if she would have it again. It’s a really big operation to go through at that age. I do wonder if it’s the best thing really.

Thank you for your response, really helpful to get an insight from experience.

I had a valve replacement and a double by-pass two and a half years ago- I was in my early 50s at the time. In my case I was on bed rest for several days then on brief walks up and down the ward etc. The situation was complicated by fluid on my lungs and I ended up going back into theatre to have chest drains more accurately inserted than was possible without anaesthetic. I ended up staying in hospital nearly 3 weeks and when I was at home I was fairly breathless on any exertion but gradually this improved. Obviously, it is a major procedure and, of course, your DGM is quite elderly which probably makes a differece but you can come through it and with people like you to support her this will all help. Just remember that every day is a day further towards recovery. Hope this helps,

Clarinet, bless you. Thank you for your kind review. You’ve really been through the mill and I hope you’re doing better these days.

We’re with her every step of the way and will be as positive as possible. Thank you for your kind words and advice.

Review?! I mean words! I need to go to bed, clearly!

Bless your heart @Aybecee .

My DM is due one. I really wish you & DGM the very best.

Ifoureyes ❤️ Thank you. It’s tough to see them in the days following the op but the care has been unbelievable. Judging by the responses, these patients need all the encouragement they can get. I hope your mum gets hers soon and it goes as well as possible