Ex messaging son

[JungStyx]

Posting for traffic

Background;

I was with sons dad for about 6 months before I got pregnant with him. When son was 1 or almost 1 (he's now almost 19) his dad was arrested. When he was released when son was about 3/4 he was told by ss he can't go near son (for some outing reasons). When he was younger I used to tell him his dad had to to away but when he was 13/14 his cousin told him.

For a few months he's started drinking a lot every night and he doesn't have a job now as he got sacked for never going.

Last night he didn't go out and his girlfriend (pregnant with sons baby) came round and stayed. And he told her that his dad has been messaging him and forcing son to drink with him. And son told me this morning after she persuaded him to. And he showed me the messages

At first when he found son on SM my son was telling him he didn't want to talk to him but he began saying he would hurt me. So my son listened and he wanted him to ruin my life. Last night son told him he wasn't going out and he started threatening him that he would hurt me and him if he reported him or told anyone.

Now I don't know what to do Because son said I can't report him to the police. And I'm not sure if it still counts that he can't go by son as he's now an adult.

Help!!

I agree - report it again.

But on a human level I'm so sorry this is still happening to you. I can't even imagine thinking you've got rid of someone like this and then finding out you haven't

He knows his dad was arrested and in prison and he couldn't see him when he was released. I told him his dad wouldn't hurt us if we reported him. He said he won't give me his phone so I can't (he's got all the messages on his phone).

And he said he might go with him tonight to keep him happy. I've told him not to but he said I can't stop him

Could his girlfriend talk to him about what kind of future could await their child?

He said he won't give me his phone so I can't (he's got all the messages on his phone).

Ouch @JungStyx this is hard on you.
If you can access his phone sneakily & screenshot, so much the better.
If son keeps dancing to dad's tune "to keep him happy" he's soon be dancing to it to "stop him from getting angry".

But you know you don't need your son;s permission to report tis latest bullshit, don't you?
Your ex, with his awful history, has re-inserted himself into your family life, & has issued threats against you & his son.

Seriously - report it.
Even just to get it logged. You may need that log, if ex escalates.

You aren't doing your job as a parent if you don't call the police. You are the adult in this situation.

You can call your local council's adult safeguarding team too, even if you don't/haven't yet called the police. They can help and advise you.

Just report him. Police can access the phone if needed.