Children’s Birthday parties - Money as a present

[DustyLoveday]

I am probably going to get shot down for this but I hate it when parents give money as a present.
I think it’s fine from family members but not at parties where your child has invited school friends.
It just seems a bit lazy. Like the parent couldn’t be arsed to look for a present and wrap it up.
My 7 year old just had a party and had loads of cards with people just saying ‘I stuck a bit of money in there’. Obviously grateful for the money etc but it is nice to see the joy on a child’s face when they open a present that someone has taken the time to make an effort for them.

Money is loads better, you don't end up with 30 new toys that the child may not even like and nowhere to put them then. I'm always delighted when people at my kids parties give cash instead. Less tat in my house!

Also, I hate to break it to you OP, but when people bring a present to your child's birthday, that in no way means any effort has been put into the choice. It's just as likely to mean the harassed parent grabbed the first vaguely suitable thing they saw when they remembered the party two hours ago and did a panicky shop run. Or, whisper it, a regift.

We all do money in card in DS group of friends. He can then buy something decent like a bike - much better than a load of Lego sets. He never plays with toys. Some do Vbucks for Fortnite. Kids love shopping for themselves.

I like giving money as the birthday child can choose something they want.
I prefer my children to receive money from school friends as then they can choose something or save the money if they want. That what no one has endless tat which clutters up the house

It’s a lot better than some £10 shite I’ll get otherwise. My rule is generally- infant age gets a present, junior and above her cash.

If your kid is in a firm group of friends,it's quite nice to club together with the other parents in the "Brat Pack" and buy something a bit bigger. Perhaps an accompaniment to a present the parents have got.

*that way

I agree OP. Money always seems a bit soulless and unimaginative. At least a book token or a voucher for a specific shop shows a bit of effort! I’d also hate to live somewhere where money was the norm as sometimes I have more money than other times & have been known to buy VERY cheap presents when desperate! That said, I’m obviously grateful when someone gives my child anything at all. I just wouldn’t ever give money as a gift myself.

At 7, I was still buying presents but this year now my youngest is ten, money in the card is much more frequent. Some of DD2's friends are boys and I have really no idea what ten year old boys like. Though they do all seem to like getting money.

I even gave my DN money for his birthday and knowing he was about to go on holiday, he can take it with him.

Book tokens and vouchers for specific shops are quite often a pain in the arse ime. And seem like the worst of both worlds. It still doesn't involve any 'imagination', not that buying a physical gift necessarily does either, but for those who think it does and value this you're not offering them that. And it's still not giving them the free choice that cash does.

My dc prefer money now. At 7 you’re on the borderline but tbh it’s going to get more and more that people give money instead of gifts from now on, with the older kids it is normally just a better choice all round. The children normally prefer it and less hassle for the parents... win win. I don’t give money normally in infants, it’s nice to choose a gift for the little ones but as kids get older their likes are more specific and they may be saving up for more expensive things and not as interested in the generic gifts. If people can get a really well thought out gift then great, otherwise £10 preferable to random item from the gift cupboard or Argos

@Fucket
I am grateful as said in my original post.

I've always done it. It's what most kids prefer.

I LOVE it when my dc receive money as presents at birthday parties & so do they!

Family buy gifts suited to the dc interests, hobbies or with ideas from me which is lovely.

Ds had his party recently & he's into Harry Potter & received 3 sets of HP Top Trumps & a cheap HP swim bag. He said thank you to everyone & was grateful but he has a good swimming bag already & has played with 1 pack of top trumps & I managed to return the 2 others & gave him the money.

Money just cuts out the hassle & the dc can choose something they would like.

Obviously grateful for the money etc

Not really coming across tbh. You sound unbelievable ungrateful if anything - by all means send all the money back to those lazy can’t be arsed parents if your so unhappy with it.

I used to buy gifts and when I RSVP I ask if the child is particularly into something/wants something but generally get the response 'anything is fine!' which is not helpful!

Its easier and cheaper to put money in a card, and although I think they like unwrapping stuff when they are very little, after a certain age they prefer the cash so they can buy something bigger that they really want.

When I had my first child, some years ago, I would have agreed with you. Now my last child is still tiny, and I'm of the opinion that money is the better option. Better to buy one good quality gift the child really wants, than to get them heaps of crap.