To not want my children to call this man Grandad.

[KB197]

I have two DC, my son from a previous relationship whom my partner treats as his own and we have DD together.

I’m all for stepparents, grandparents etc. I call my stepdad my dad and the kids call him grandad as he’s been a part of my life since I was small and is pretty much my dad.

However, my mother in laws got a long term partner who she insists my children call him Grandad which I’m not overly comfortable with for a few reasons...

1. My partner doesn’t consider the guy a stepdad. OH was an adult when his mum met the guy.

1. The guy has little to no patience with the children and doesn’t act like any form of grandad.

1. The guy has 3 children of his own in which he hasn’t had any contact with for several years. They also have children so he has biological grandchildren he’s never met.

1. She uses the whole ‘grandad ’ Thing all over Facebook when she knows there’s a chance one is his bio children might see it. Coincidentally I was friends with his daughter at school and I am Facebook friends with her. So she must see it and I feel guilty for it. Knowing my mil she proably does it on purpose for a reaction (that’s another story!)

Aibu?

OH has little contact with his dad so that isn’t really an issue but I’m just confused. Does this man sound like he should be ‘Grandad’ or not?

1 and 2 aren’t relevant, but I can see the issue with 3 and 4. Is it worth falling out with MIL over?

I’m not going to fall out with her but she’s so pushy over the grandad thing. My youngest does call him grandad as she knows no different but my son (not her bio grandson) started off calling him by his first name and prefers calling him that! I don’t want to force him to use ‘grandad’.

YANBU.

Just keep referring to him by his name and your children will probably catch on to it.

What does your partner think about it?