To be disgusted at a woman regarding child's weight at a play area. And wish I'd said something

[CrispSandwiches19]

At a country park today I was waiting for dh to use the toilet. Outside the toilets is a seating area where I was stood. Adjacent was a small play park..
Playing happily in the park was a young girl, I didn't notice, at first, as why would I? until a woman at the table near where I was stood was very vocal about a child in the park.
Saying to her husband, look at the state of 'it', her parents clearly let her get her own way. How's she ever going to learn food control etc.she obviously eats junk daily etc

I admit I turned around to see what she was on about.
I could then hear her saying to her dd of about 7/8 see that's what you'll look like if you eat macdonalds you'll be grossly obese and no one will be your friend you'll be a slob!
Continued with She needs a bra or are they just fat pads. Bet chubby will want an ice cream after playing for 5 mins.

I noticed then who she was talking about. It was a girl of about 10 happily playing with her mates, who yes of I'm honest was very over weight, but that has nothing to do with anyone. but bloody hell I couldn't believe the woman and how vocal she was.
The poor girl may be the type to have no self control or her parents, she may also have an underlying issue but either way it doesn't matter to anyone other than those close to her

Dh had come out of the toilet and I told him that I was going to tell her I thought she was disgusting but he said to leave it as people like that are narrow minded and would only wind myself up.

How can an adult be like that towards a child. OK they may think it but to be so vocal amazes me. I hope her daughter doesn't grow up to be like her

It is nasty, hopefully the girl didn't overhear what the woman said.

She said it because shes an ignorant spiteful catty show off bully trying to be funny, was she a glamourpuss, just ignore people like this, they are just pathetic and not worthy of your time and energy.

Luckily she was far enough away she wouldn't. As is imagine she gets teased a lot from peers but my god an adult! It's been on my mind since. What is she teaching her dd?

I wish you had said something, yes it’s not healthy but there is no need to be unkind.

No she wasn't a glamour puss. Just what I'd say looked like a normal family enjoying a day out.
But yes spiteful and I regret not saying something but dh prob right and to not bother as would of been a waste of time

What a sad pathetic woman. I think you were right not to say anything though. If you had said something you risked drawing the girl’s attention to the horrible things the woman was saying and embarrassing her.

She has to live in the cesspit that is her mind 24/7. I pity her.

Really mean. What a fucking prick. And what a horrible lesson she’s teaching her DD.

My DM used to go on about weight and how being fat was the worst thing imaginable. She used to adoringly tell me I was only skin and bone. I must have been about 6 because I remember telling my two wee pals about that ‘compliment’ then saying it was a shame they were so fat and tubby. Straight out my fucking mother’s mouth.

I agree with you, I think I’d have wanted to show my own child that this is not ok, and that it is important that people don’t just look the other way when someone behaves so appallingly to another person. Not sure it makes a difference with the stupid cow, but it does to your own child and it possibly does to those you stand up for.

@Agent that's so sad. And shows that things said stick with you.
Just like if that poor girl heard, which she couldn't of as was far enough away. But I'm sure she heard horrid things before

The conversation wasn't for your ears though, was it?
She was telling her own daughter to not get fat.
The ice cream thing and bra thing was unnecessary.
She could've left it at a lecture about nutrition and exercise.
You have no right to interfere with her parenting and her conversations with her own family.

People who talk like that to their children, judging other’s weight so negatively, encourage poor eating habits in their own children and poor body image so she needs to be careful she is not setting her own child up for a life time of misery and yo-yo dieting

Crisp they do indeed. My two wee friends fell out with me and I couldn’t understand why. Me and my DSis both had eating disorders when we were younger, DSis quite severely.

I’m ashamed to say this but I am glad I don’t have a DD because I feel like i’d live in constant fear of being like my mother, that certain things are still ingrained somewhere.

I didn't interfere, yes I wanted to because she was appalling as its scary that she will teach her dd to be like it and so goes on another generation, but I didn't. . I was stood right there. Pretty hard not to hear. Yes she wasn't talking to me but I could hear. As I'm sure so could others.

And her 'lecture about nutricion and exercise wasn't even said in a positive way. It was all the negatives..

It's a sad fact of life.
People don't like fat people.
They are discriminated against and have no protection because it's seen as self afflicted.
The overweight child's parents should do something, for health reasons if nothing else.
The mother was clearly enjoying ridiculing the overweight child with comments like the bra and ice cream.
Most people would have noticed an overweight kid and thought 'fat kid, poor sod'.
My brother was fat at the age of 10, luckily he shot up a foot in height and the weight kind of looked OK. We constant told him that it was cute at this age but it would affect his health and perception of him as he got older.

YANBU
What a nasty spiteful woman. Yes, it is sad when children get that overweight (if it’s avoidable, of course) but there is no need to be so nasty about it.

If she’s that vocal about an innocent child, god help anybody else but then there’s no point of arguing with stupid.
Ignorant stupid woman.
That child is probably very happy, if she’s happy to judge, that will be her problem

A “glamouspuss”? Really?

She was a bitch. I think the problem is even if you had said something she’d have just told everyone about this awful woman in the park. Disgusting way to talk about a child.

I know someone with a daughter who has ROHHAD . Imagine how unkind people are in the world, and there is no cure and a very very short life expectancy. It is awful to assume anything, just because a child is overweight. Her daughter is 11 and they know she won't live long. There are other conditions that children have, like Prader-Willi syndrome. Never assume.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ROHHAD

Speaking as a former fat child this doesn't surprise me at all. I often had adults call me names and make 'jokes' with smirky faces. Fuck knows what they were saying behind my back!

People need someone to judge, to look down on.
Theyre generally not very happy.
As twee as that might sound, its true.

Drift on, leave them to it.

You're far from unreasonable. Some people are just plain nasty! Imagine talking like that about a child and to a child, it's horrible.

I would say this woman was not a good parent at all, talking that way in front of her children is a terrible way to behave.

Yeh I get that her comment was nasty but childhood obesity isn’t something good or should be accepted