To not be sure why this doesn’t sit right with me?

[MaxAndBillie]

I met up with a friend today and she mentioned about looking up someone on Facebook (who’s partner had been murdered) and leaving them a comment on their page of condolences.

They didn’t know this person. Neither did the other 200+ people who left a message. The person is also just a regular person and hasn’t put themselves out publicly.

I don’t know why it sits uneasy with me. I just hope this person finds some form of comfort in those messages.

@ParkheadParadise Bloody hell, how awful and I'm so sorry for your loss I can't imagine

I know someone who does this and I call her a grief thief. She finds a reason every awful story is tentatively related to her and then makes it all about her upset.

I've shed quite a few tears the last few days over news stories when alone but think actively looking individuals up is macabre and unless it's on an official remembrance page set up by their loved ones it seems attention seeking.

I wouldn't do it but I wouldn't criticise someone that did. I think it comes from a good place and I know when I lost a close relative, I did take comfort from the messages and cards I received. It definitely didn't make me feel worse. Nothing could have done that.

A few years ago I had a string of fb messages from people saying 'RIP sweet angel' and the like.

At first I was really unsettled as it felt like a threat or some kind of hoax that lots of people were in on, it was spooky because although the people were 200 miles away they were actually from very near the town where all my family live.

It turned out someone with the same name as me had died young of cancer. And people were messaging her (or thought they were) to tell her they were sorry she'd died and to RIP.

Mindboggling.

One nut job on a public FB page, kept commenting as if she personally knew me, telling all the other's how I was dealing with it. My sister contacted the page and got it taken down.
It's really weird how some people think it ok to do this.
There was also people who thought it was ok to say very hurtful comments.
It didn't help that reporters and the local news were asking for stories, and some were very happy to talk.

Sorry @ParkheadParadise . You must be a strong person to have managed that (and by strong, I mean amazing to have coped with something so awful).

So sorry for your loss @parkheadparadise.

@ParkheadParadise that's awful! I had about a hundred friend requests on FB after my brother died from alcohol abuse - but that was different, I'd actually asked for his friends to get in touch and pass the word around so we could let everyone know the plan for his funeral.