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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want my neighbours friends kids to fuck off

52 replies

Inferiorbeing · 17/08/2019 18:16

My neighbour has made a new friend. This friend brings her children over but they aren't allowed in my neighbours house (make of that what you will) so they always talk outside. The friends kids are horrible. Rude and poorly behaved. They constantly run around my drive, hide behind and touch my car. Even sometimes throwing gravel around. I've tried speaking to them, standing outside while they are there and telling the kids off myself but their mum just seems to think they should be allowed to do these things. It's a brand new car which I bought as a treat for getting a promotion, it's just so disrespectful.

I love my house and loved my neighbours but these kids are driving me mad Angry any idea what I can do?

OP posts:
Crunchymum · 17/08/2019 20:08

You are young 20's and teach teenagers?

Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 17/08/2019 20:16

Ooh I'll have to look at the cat one!
Yeah I'm a maths teacher at 22, but honestly I have no experience with small kids so I always double guess myself Hmm if it was teenagers I would way more confidence than with rude 8 years olds Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 17/08/2019 20:16

*confident

OP posts:
tierraJ · 17/08/2019 20:16

Annoy them by going out & talking to them non stop in a really patronising way as if they were much younger than they are - they will either a) think you are strange & avoid you or b) feel embarrassed and avoid you.

I once called these really thuggish local boys 'so sweet' & they actually never bothered me again haha!

Or... get a scary male involved.
An elderly neighbour had trouble with lads playing football in his garden. So my sister got her scary bodybuilder boyfriend of the time to literally just say Fuck. Off.

The lads parents weren't looking for trouble so didn't get involved & the elderly neighbour was left alone from that day on.

Or make your drive an uninviting place to be.
As pp said, lots of large heavy (hard to move) pots with spiky plants that need watering each time the brats turn up, needing to wash your car on the drive with unfashionable music blasting at top volume, borrow a dog that barks at children for a week. Etc

Also the sonic scarer sounds like a good idea.

ScaryBunnyPainting · 17/08/2019 20:19

You are young 20's and teach teenagers?

I don’t see what’s so unusual about that?

OP this would drive me mad. I’d tell your neighbour that you can’t wait for September for the situation to end and she needs to make her friend aware that the children are misbehaving on your property.

I would also take photos of your house, garden and car incase there is any damage.

Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 17/08/2019 20:19

@tierraJ I did send DP out there once who is a semi pro boxer so can look quite intimidating. They ran off quite quickly, but they still return whenever he isn't here. I like the idea of making them feel awkward and my drive somewhere to avoid!

OP posts:
VenusTiger · 17/08/2019 20:20

@MoreSlidingDoors I heard one of those on tinternet the other day and it was absolutely horrid 😖 it screeches like a tv!
I’m 38!

Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 17/08/2019 20:21

@ScaryBunnyPainting everytime I see them now i go out to double check the car, I'm quite lucky because my living room has large windows onto the drive so I can keep an eye on damage. But then also unlucky because I can see them whenever they show up!

OP posts:
daisyboocantoo · 17/08/2019 20:31

A metro station in Gateshead dealt with a similar issue by playing classical music loudly over the speakers.

Might that work?

OnlyaMan · 17/08/2019 20:32

They are not your friend's children? They are the children of your neighbour? Who does not allow them in her house?
"Touching your car" does not sound a big deal, but the children are basically strangers to you!
Just tell their mother (whoever she is) that they are not welcome. What do you care? Your neighbour will have to suffer the "Flak".

Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 17/08/2019 20:41

@OnlyaMan They are my neighbours friends children..
No i do think its a bit petty about the car but the kids aren't anything to do with me and I paid a lot for it (not a lot in car terms but a lot to me) and i want to be able to at least prevent damage. And also i think the kids should have some respect :(
Yeah i think i will have to because its really winding me up now!

OP posts:
Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 17/08/2019 20:41

@daisyboocantoo Love that idea!

OP posts:
Elenorrigbywoes · 18/08/2019 08:56

Your next door neighbour needs to be blunt and say that daily visits don't suit. I'm not sure there is anyone and their kids that I would want to visit daily.

MissCharleyP · 18/08/2019 09:09

I used to have this with one gf flat I lived in. The path and step to the communal front door were right outside my living room window and kids used to sit and congregate on it. None of them lived there, it was just a convenient spot for a chat. I put a stop to it by blasting ‘Do the Conga’ and ‘I am the Music Man’ by Black Lace through my open window!

YouTheCat · 18/08/2019 09:53

Beware sonic anything. The sound is awful. I'm nearly 50 and can still hear the damn things. Sound makes me feel sick every time. If you're in your 20s, the chances are you'll find it more irritating than the kids.

I recommend playing Wagner, loudly. Engage the little monsters in chats about maths and school. Give them some maths problems. They'll not want to go round anymore.

CrotchetyQuaver · 18/08/2019 10:08

Sounds like you'd be doing your NDN a favour if you went round every single time and got their mother to actually parent her children. They might be much nicer kids if she paid them some positive attention. Alternatively she'll stop going round because of your hassling. Win, win?

cricketmum84 · 18/08/2019 10:31

@YouTheCat same here. My ndn has one to keep cats away but I've struggled to even sit out in the garden this year because the sound drives me mad, I'm 35! It's awful! DH says I'm imagining it though.

ColdAndSad · 18/08/2019 10:35

I think you said the children were about 4 and 8, OP. I'd wonder if a 4 year old should be left to run around out on the roads like that, and if not, who you could report that to.

whattodowith · 18/08/2019 10:37

Sprinkler system sounds good but you shouldn’t really have to spend money on deterring young children from your garden. It’s so bizarre they’re not allowed in the house... Every time they misbehave I would be knocking on the neighbours door tbh.

Gamble66 · 18/08/2019 10:42

Cheap camera to record any damage - make neighbor aware !

katewhinesalot · 18/08/2019 10:48

Does the cat scarer affect rabbits, guinea pigs etc? If it does check there aren't any around in nearby houses. They can exactly escape the noise.

Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 18/08/2019 10:50

Thank you all! Yeah the 4 year old sometimes runs around the road, and has very nearly been hit by DP coming onto the drive. I think constantly speaking to the kids and their mum will help, luckily I'm at home a lot as it's the school holidays so plenty of time to annoy them Grin
I think people are right and they just want some positive attention from their mum, it's sad but I do have limited sympathy for them now!

OP posts:
Original poster
Inferiorbeing · 18/08/2019 10:52

@katewhinesalot oh good point! I have house rabbits and the neighbour on the other side has some too. Definitely need to look into it.

OP posts:
greenwaterbottle · 18/08/2019 10:53

Just treat them like short teenagers. They have much of the same traits.

Missingstreetlife · 18/08/2019 11:01

Report as antisocial behaviour. Council and neighbourhood police. Your neighbour needs to tell her friend the kids aren't welcome.
Go batshit crazy, scream and shout whenever you see them. Run out of the house yelling and swearing. Make them proper scared